Sunday, April 29, 2007

Beauty Pageant: Most Alluring Arse

Note: Scroll down to see new pics of Infomaniac Bitches' arses as they come in. Don’t be shy. Send us a photo of your glorious arse.

Infomaniac is taking a few days off. And yes, part of the time off will involve writing the “Definitive History of the Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts” which will be followed up a.s.a.p. by the actual Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts Caption Competition.

But now on to a competition of a different sort…

Below are pics of three Infomaniac readers’ arses. Tell us which one you think is the most alluring arse. There’s no prize in this except the thrill of ogling their beauteous buttocks. And perhaps they’ll let you fondle their delightful derrieres if you ask nicely.

Piggy’s arse…

Old Knudsen’s arse…

Tickers’ arse…

If you think your arse is more appealing than the selection here, please email a pic and I’ll include it.

Bye bye, bitches. I’ll be back on Thursday or Friday.

UPDATE: The competition stiffens as our Alasdair from Canada's Northwest Territories contributes this pic of his arse for the “Alluring Arse” competition…

UPDATE: The Canucks are quickly gaining in the competition as they wipe up the rear. Here’s Winnipeg’s WW strutting his stuff…

UPDATE: The Canucks catch up to the Brits (3 and 3) with this pic of our Spikey from Toronto. Spikey’s too shy to bare all but we’ve caught him spending a penny so points for that, at least…

UPDATE: It’s a tiebreaker as British ex-pat in Los Angeles, Eddie Waring, bares his hairy arse…

UPDATE: The Brits take the lead as Tony burns up the rear with his beautiful blushing arse. Mmm .. peachy…

UPDATE (Oct.07): Tazzy’s beautiful botty...

Let's have a rimshot for Rimshot!...

UPDATE (Jan.08): Mutley's arse...

UPDATE (Feb.08): Manuel's heroic arse. The arse that saved Infomaniac!...

UPDATE (Feb.08): Old Knudsen's arse post liver spot bleaching...

Beast's Arse (with trousers)...

Beast's bare botty...

UPDATE (Nov.08): Donn’s delightful derriere…

UPDATE (Nov.08): The famtastic FamulARSE of Famulus…

UPDATE: (Dec. ’08): Another beautiful British arse from Hardhouse…

UPDATE: (April 2009): The bouncy British bottom of Dr. Maroon…

UPDATE: (April 2009): Proof that it’s hot hot hot in Florida!

Mean Dirty Pirate’s arse of perfection…

UPDATE: (May 2009) Why are Canadian men so shy about taking their pants off?

Here’s Kevin, a picture of modesty in Manties from Toronto, Ontario, Canada…

UPDATE: (May 2009) Due to peer pressure, Kevin succumbed and submitted a photo of his bare bottom…

UPDATE: (May 2009) All the way from New Zealand, it’s Damien’s arse!...

UPDATE: (May 2009) From Fresno, California, the sun shines out of Mikey’s arse!...

UPDATE: (August 2009): The bewitching buttchops of San Francisco’s Mr. Peenee

The only picture I can find of my ass has a portion of it concealed (barely) in a Merry Widow, but there is at least a glimpse of buttchop. For those interested in fashion details, the seat was covered in black marabou.

UPDATE: (January 2010): The heavenly heiny of Kabuki Zero

UPDATE: (June 2010): The beauteous glutes of Chicago’s Michael Guy

UPDATE: (November 2011): Montreal's DEEP BLUE JON shows off his leather-clad derrière...

UPDATE: (January 2012): Topher’s tush in Naples, Florida…

UPDATE: (January 2012): An Aussie bum! ... Princess’s posterior…

UPDATE: (January 2012): DRUM ROLL, PLEASE!

Announcing Infomaniac’s FIRST female bare bottom…NURSEMYRA!...

UPDATE: (June 2013): HAYWARD and his "Snackable" arse from Illinois!...


  1. Yay! First!

    Mine is the most alluring, obviously.

    Old Knudsey's is spoily by that collection of liver spots.

    And Ticker's is only half an arse.

  2. Liver spots are the new pimples.
    It was vert uncomfortable folding my giant penis in 3 so I could lie doon like that.

    Oh 3 'big' pieces.

  3. Well, I'm going to have to go with my old pal Ticker's arse, even though it is only half an arse.

    Piggy's looks like a Jim Henson creation - A Muppet arse, if you will. It looks like it might start singing or something.
    As for Old Knudsen's, I'm not quite seeing Liver Spots as the new Pimples. Not until Autumn, anyway.

  4. Tickerrrrrrrrrrrrrs arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrse.

    I have soiled myself.

    Please add my vote for Ticker's arse and if he wins, perhaps you can get him to bend over for us all??

  5. Well Knudsen used to have the best Bum in Scotland.But Thats All behind Him Now.
    Piggy's got a bit of a cheek i would say............
    Tickers would never be bottom of his class i would think......
    Ive never seen mine so i dont know if i should be jealous or not.

  6. Tickers! Tickers! Tickers! You've got my vote, bum boy...

  7. Is Piggy saying I've exposed my self in a half arsed fashion?

  8. What a fuckin liberty...

  9. Tickers gets my vote - although congrats to all participation in this intriguing contest.

  10. I can't be arsed to vote.

  11. I've come to know and love intimately that pic of Piggy's arse.
    So that's the one for me.

    Just going to read a week of Infomaniac that I missed (rubs hands in anticipation..)

  12. Lending my support to all things half arsed...Tickers it is!

  13. What's all this then? Where do you think you're off to?
    Well good riddance to you and all of the other Irish Travellers.

    What the bloody hell are you Pikeys up to now?
    Off to defraud a new neighbourhood eh? Get evicted again? See you on 60 Minutes..and don't forget yer Degs!

  14. what, they only come in vanilla??

  15. I vote for none. None as nice as mine that is!!! I prefer the female version, not old man....

  16. no, i'm just getting snowblind here.
    obviously this blog does not do it's part in encouraging multicultural heinie participation.

  17. It helps catch the fish.. better than worms!

  18. Oooo Spikey has very nice legs!

  19. I am certain that Tickers has had arse implants. No-one can be that pert naturally...

  20. I feel like I'm getting the Bum's Rush here.

    I'm disappointed that there aren't more of the 'couldn't leave his friend's behind' comments.

  21. Personalized, signed prints are available. Glossy 5x7 photo paper. Money orders, cash or bankers checks only. Email me for details.

  22. I recognise that last one I'd know those tats anywhere.

  23. Knudsen - You mean that was you in the Snow White costume? I thought your hands were rather calloused for a lady.

  24. Where are the weemen's arses?

  25. Tony's arse looks like it's been freshly spanked.

    The pervy cunt.

    *wonders if Old Knudsey was the one that spanked it*

    Oh and we have a new URL, by the way. You've noticed already, probably.

  26. And post something new, for fuck's sake.

  27. Well?

    We're waiting.

  28. do u know i coudnt find a single pic of my arse?

    still, im well up for the knob shots

  29. MARTIN & JOHN: What have you done with Tazzy & Piggy? I want them back. And quit using m&j. It looks too much like mj. Fucking annoying Yorkshire poofs.

    FROBI: Knob shots? THAT brought me out of my long sleep. Send them. Now.

    ALL OF YOU BITCHES: I'll be back soon. I'm expecting another arse photo and then I'll be back to regular posting.

  30. Why is it when I see Piggy's/John's arse I can only think of two words.

    Gluteous Maximus?

    Did you get my pic yet?

    Oh that's don't like posting your favourites.

    Do you?

    And shorts now bitch!

  31. M&J aka PIGGY: *seethes*

    TICKERS: See what you’ve done, Piggy?

    SID: I am honouring our agreement not to post those “artistic photos” you keep sending to me.

    Shorts? Hmmm. Stay tuned.

  32. To all you bitches who submitted photos of your glorious arses...

    Bravo! Good sports. Big balls. All of you. At least I think you have big balls. Maybe you'd better send me some pics of those too.

  33. What a glorious birthday tribute for me from Dr Maroon! And how nice that it can be seen in a wider arena, so to speak. How many other women of a certain age have been honoured by a poorly-lettered greeting on the back of a cut-price vest worn by a philandering old inebriate? I was born lucky.

  34. MRS. P: We're considering having Hallmark greeting cards of his arse created for broader distribution.

    Perhaps it's not too soon to consider the movie rights either.