Monday, July 31, 2006

Over-Excited? Too Turned On?

Horny Remover from Japan.

We are thinking much about human body.
Enjoy promoting your health with our healthy goods.

The UK’s ‘Most Annoying’ List

James Blunt

“Singer James Blunt is more irritating than traffic wardens, noisy neighbours and estate agents, according to a poll ranking the UK's most annoying things.”

The top ten most annoying things are:

1. Cold callers
2. Caravans
3. Queue jumpers
4. James Blunt
5. Traffic wardens
6. Tailgaters
7. Brown nosers
8. Chantelle and Preston
9. Ex-smokers
10. Noisy neighbours
11. Tazzy and Piggy

Read the complete list of the top 100 most annoying things in The Mirror.

Did they miss anything?

A Tale of Two Bogs

An American cranberry drink company has launched a new advertising campaign as illustrated in the photo above.

The ad shows a couple of farmers standing knee-deep in a cranberry bog, i.e. a wetland area where cranberries are cultivated.

I’m not sure this same campaign slogan would be successful in the UK where “bog” has an entirely different meaning...

British “bog”

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Cattle Shed Striptease

Prince Charles, patron of the Welsh Black Cattle Society, not available for comment

The Welsh Black Cattle Society found itself at the centre of controversy after reports of a striptease in a cattle shed. A woman got on a table and stripped naked in front of 150 people.

Witnesses said the woman was hosed down during the performance with water normally used to wash and feed the cattle.

One witness, who did not want to be named, said security guards rushed to the scene late on Tuesday, but had difficulty grabbing the woman because the water had made her skin slippery.

Another said the woman's thong, discarded during the act, was returned to her on the end of a pitchfork used to muck out the cattle lines.

The Mitchell Brothers

Grant and Phil Mitchell from the BBC TV show EastEnders

Frobi: the photo above has been posted just for you and Miles.

TAZ & PIG RADIO: Your Ears Will Bleed

Announcing the launch of Taz & Pig Web Radio at Tazzy and Piggy Dot Com

If you haven’t already been over there, you’ll find a link to Taz Radio on the right hand side of their page. Although being typical poofs, they’ve probably rearranged the furniture on their website yet again and who knows where the radio link will be by the time you read this.

In any case, you can make requests and dedications. Although all I’ve done so far is ask DJ Taz to talk dirty to me.

There’s a Playlist option so you can browse the huge selection of tunes available.

If you’re lucky, DJ Taz will be spinning the tunes live while you’re there. If not, the music is on a 24-hour loop so you can tune in anytime. (Note to SID: I checked. It’s really 24/7.)

Occasionally a drunken Piggy gets hold of the controls when DJ Taz is out of the room and all hell breaks lose with farting sound effects and such. DJ Taz can’t turn his back without that wee Piggy running amok.

So give Taz & Pig Radio a listen and tell ‘em MJ sent you.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Is It Happy Hour Yet?

Micky Yanai: Japanese Porn Star / Inventor

He is the inventer of Helicopter fuck. and he is the most famous Japanese porn star. and he is not so famous in Japan. This is the proof that he is great.

He have hair on his head. but He has no hair on his penis and nats' sack. because he pull out hair of penis by tweezer. Not cutting, but pulling out it.

Micky Yanai is a trained professional. Don’t try this at home. (opens to NSFW QuickTime video clip)

Positive Proof of Global Warming

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Keep Your Shirt On

British men may be barred from baring their chests - and stomachs - in public under new local laws being considered by town halls.

Tranny Cam

Frankie the Tranny has returned from a trip to the seaside.

Join her as she shows off her new eyelashes and models her new nightie and glam bling. Watch for the nine-inch nails and sexy cigarette smoking. Try not to get too turned on.

(Cam may take a few extra seconds to load)

Note to Tazzy and Piggy: This Tranny Cam is much more riveting than your Poofter Cam. I’m switching over.

Via [Lady Bunny]

Dating Tips Illustrated With Dolls

10 Types of MEN You Need to Avoid

Men who are always pissing on everything

10 Types of WOMEN You Need to Avoid

The woman who is one big freak show

Wednesday, July 26, 2006


This video clip is for First Nations who used the word “bitty” in a recent posting. You’re wondering why I laughed at the word “bitty” in your posting. This clip will explain why. And as you don’t have your sound card yet, I’ll fill you in…

The word “bitty” is a combination of the words “breast” and “titty.” It’s from a recurring sketch in the BBC TV comedy show Little Britain. A grown man utters the word “bitty” whenever he wants to be breastfed by his mother.

Guess the Blogger

Can you guess which blogger belongs to this unsightly arse?

The correct answer will appear Thursday morning in this space.

Answer: These beastly buttocks belong to PIGGY of Tazzy and Piggy.

Congratulations to Midget Arse, Tom909 and Awaiting who all guessed correctly. I know that Midget Arse has seen Piggy’s arse a million times but how did the rest of you know? Hmm?

Everyone else: Email me a photo of your arse if you would like your butt to be featured next on “Guess the Blogger.”

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Good Queen Piggy

Wanted: Compulsive Wankers

Are you a compulsive masturbator?

Channel Four is looking for men of all ages who are suffering from compulsive masturbation and would like to seek help.

The programme will be a frank and open account of two men's attempts to kick the habit. It will involve a week of filming, possibly in the US.

One of the participants in the new show - who says he masturbates 20 times a day - has already been cast, but the producer is seeking a second male for the programme.

Interested? Apply here.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Etiquette for Entertaining

Guests arrive from Montreal this week chez Infomaniac.

My questions to you are:

1) How much housework is necessary to make guests feel comfortable? I’m thinking that clean sheets, clean towels and a clean bathroom are sufficient.

2) Is it rude to blog with guests in the house? Please advise.

(Note to Betty: The image above is for you after seeing your comment on Geoff’s blog.)


The opening drumbeat of this song hooks me and the adorable Ronnie Spector and her voice lure me in.

No matter where I am, if I hear Be My Baby, I must stop what I’m doing and listen.

And what about you lot?

Tell us the song that stops you dead in your tracks. The song you can’t resist.

And now, Be My Baby…

Be My Baby hit the charts in August 1963.

The Ronettes were Veronica ‘Ronnie’ Bennett, Ronnie’s sister Estelle Bennett and their cousin Nedra Talley.

The Ronettes (left to right) Veronica 'Ronnie' Bennett, Nedra Talley and Estelle Bennett

Music impresario Phil Spector took the Ronettes under his wing, produced Be My Baby and other hits for them, and married Ronnie in 1968.

Phil Spector was a control-freak who wouldn’t allow Ronnie to record or to leave the house. Phil and Ronnie divorced in 1974.

Phil Spector today

While Phil Spector earned millions at their expense, he cheated the Ronettes out of their royalties.

Ronnie wrote a best-selling autobiography, Be My Baby: How I Survived Mascara, Miniskirts, and Madness, or My Life as a Fabulous Ronette.

More about Ronnie Spector and what she’s doing now.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

SUNDAY SONGS: Sister Rosetta Tharpe – Down By the Riverside

Watch Sister Rosetta Tharpe's live performance of "Down By the Riverside" on TV Gospel Time in the 1960s.

Rock it, Sister!

Sister Rosetta Tharpe: March 20, 1915 – October 9, 1973


Saturday, July 22, 2006

Buddy Cole Discusses Vice

Canada’s favourite faggot discusses vice.

Let’s face it. People will always need to get high, yes? And that goes double for faggots. If we made the rules, pot wouldn’t be illegal… hockey would.

I’ll Wash Yours if You’ll Wash Mine

The photo above illustrates a typical conversation in the household of Tazzy and Piggy as they do the washing up.

SUMMER SONGS: Eric Burdon & War – Spill the Wine

Spill the Wine was a hit in 1970.

Best Bond Girl

Ursula Andress has been voted best Bond girl for her 1962 role as Honey Ryder in Dr No.

The survey also reveals:

The ultimate Bond film (Goldfinger)

The ultimate Bond car chase (The Spy Who Loved Me)

The ultimate Bond gadget (Lotus Esprit in The Spy Who Loved Me)

The ultimate Bond villain (Blofeld)

Friday, July 21, 2006

“I Test Sex Toys for a Living”

Unemployed? Thinking of changing careers? Find new direction in your life as a sex toy tester.

Read about a woman who test-drives sex toys for a living.

Think of me as the Consumer Reports of sex-toy testing -- my standards are that high.

I keep a notebook by my bed, so I can immediately jot down notes, like "feels slimy" or "has a funny aftertaste.”

And read about a man who test-drives sex toys for a living.

Just because I test sex toys, doesn’t mean I’m some lonely troll living under a bridge whacking off to Penthouse.

Flatulent Friday

According to historian Eric Rabkin, the Canelos Indians believe that when they fart, the soul escapes the body along with the smell. “When in a group someone breaks wind, one of the rest will clap him on the back three times and say, ‘Uianza, uianza!’ The exact meaning of this word is unknown, but the person who farted is then obligated to prepare a uianza feast. (Alternatively, Rabkin says, the farter can discharge his obligation by giving the clapper three clay vessels of manioc beer.)

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Hot Enough For Ya?

Prettier in Pink

Recognize this pink dress from the previous posting? But look who’s wearing it now … it’s our wee Piggy!

Puzzled? Let’s turn back the clock a day or two, shall we?

Piggy and his superhero Tazzy had been shopping at their local Sainsbury’s Supermarket. Or was it Morrisons? Or Tesco? Doesn’t matter. They were stuffing their cart full of all that crap you see them noshing on when the Poofter Cam is switched on. Sausage sarnies. Botulism-infected coronation chicken sandwiches. And such.

Piggy was innocently sniffing an avocado in Aisle 7 when he just happened to glance at the luscious Tazzy. Lo and behold doesn’t Piggy get a stiffy (which he can be grateful for since the doctor prescribed that Viagra cocktail.)

The wee stiffy would NOT go away. It lasted all the way through the rest of the shopping, with Piggy regularly adjusting his stance to hide any obvious display, all the way through the check-out and into the car park. You don’t believe me? Read about it here.

So Piggy’s out in the supermarket parking lot hoping they can make a speedy getaway home and do whatever it is poofters get up to behind closed doors. (Don’t try to picture it. It’s filthy.)

He’s about to turn the ignition over when along struts a vision in high heels with legs up to HERE and wearing a frilly pink frock. (Actually, I think the tranny got that dress out of Midget Arse’s closet.) The vision of loveliness is the tantalyzing tranny pictured in the posting below.

Piggy trips the tranny (he can’t pull in the traditional way) and pushes her into the back seat. The three slutty shirtlifters speed out of the parking lot and race back for a romp chez Tazzy and Piggy.

Afterwards, cigarettes are smoked. The tranny passes out. Tazzy and Piggy relax. Piggy feels he can open up to his superhero Tazzy and share his secret for the first time.

Piggy glances at the lacy pink frock, now tossed carelessly in a heap on the bedroom floor (along with the sausage sarnie crumbs.)

“Would I? Could I? Should I?”

Piggy caresses the shiny pink fabric and clutches it to his heaving bosom(s).


Okay you lot. Over to you. Finish the story. Tell is like it is.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Pretty in Pink

National Daiquiri Day

Today is National Daiquiri Day.

I’ll drink to that!

London to Stage Huge Public Wankfest

The First International Masturbate-A-Thon
London, England
August 5, 2006

Hundreds of people are expected to gather in a hall in central London on August 5 to pleasure themselves in aid of charity.

Prizes will be on offer for those who clock up the most orgasms and those who can masturbate the longest - the current record, according to the organisers, is a chafing eight-and-a-half hours.

To qualify for the record, the organisers say "at least 55 minutes of every hour shall be spent self-pleasuring by manual or sex toy stimulation" with participants getting just five minutes to "replenish and renew.”

Ceiling Cat

Cristiano Ronaldo Action Figure

He’s a cheeky chappy.

With unique uppy-downy action.

“And coming soon! The number 10 French football action figure.”

Via [Bratwurst]

Jonesin for a Jones-In

A Welsh town wants to break the record for the largest gathering of people with the same names.

Blaenau Ffestiniog is planning a get-together for hundreds who have the surname Jones.

The record is currently held by Sweden for a gathering of 583 Norbergs, said The Times.

*wonders if our Prunella Jones from the 'celebs and stuff' blog will attend*

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

SUMMER SONGS: Martha Reeves & The Vandellas – Dancing in the Street

It’s time for another summer song and in honour of Martha Reeves’ 65th birthday (born July 18, 1941) let’s watch a video clip of Dancing in the Street.

Dancing in the Street, written by Marvin Gaye, William “Mickey” Stevenson and Ivy Jo Hunter, was a hit in 1964.

Update: Geoff was hoping for The Mick Jagger – David Bowie version of Dancing in the Street. So here it is…

Totty Week: VIN DIESEL

I’m behind in my “Totty Week” requests so here’s one for Awaiting. Although she’s already had Billy Zane. Apparently he wasn’t enough for her. Greedy bitch.

Today is Vin Diesel’s 39th birthday. So Awaiting, why don’t you give him a big smooch?

Update: Awaiting has spoken. She wants more revealing pics of Vin.

Vin tries to cleanse himself from his impure thoughts of Awaiting

Vin checks to see if his weenie is intact after a round with Awaiting

Love Emergency

Before we take a look at this story, can anyone tell me why the emergency telephone number is 9-1-1 in Canada and the United States but it's 9-9-9 in the UK? I'd like to know.

And now to the news…

Police throughout Canada and the USA have begged the public to stop calling 9-1-1 unless they face a true emergency. Police are overwhelmed by requests for directions, weather conditions, and other trivial matters. Trivial calls jeopardize the lives of people who are trying to reach 9-1-1 to report actual danger.

Lorna Dudash is a prime example of how not to use the emergency telephone system.

Lorna Dudash: Poster girl for stupid 9-1-1 calls

Lorna Dudash dialed 9-1-1 with an emergency, a love emergency. The Oregon woman called 9-1-1 to ask that "a cutie pie" sheriff's deputy return to her house.

Two Washington County deputies had knocked on her door after neighbors phoned-in a noise complaint. After they left, Dudash phoned 9-1-1 but admitted to the dispatcher that she just wanted to meet the deputy again.

And she got a date all right - a date to appear in court. The deputy returned and arrested Dudash for misusing the 9-1-1 emergency number.

She now faces up to a year in jail and a $6,000 fine.

And while we’re on the topic of love emergencies, this looks like a case in need of immediate medical treatment!

Monday, July 17, 2006

Wiarton Willie

Flags in Wiarton, Ontario are flying at half-mast today.

A memorial service will be held today for Wiarton Willie, the weather-predicting albino groundhog.

The eight-year-old rodent died of an infection on July 11, 2006. Willie’s handler Holly Morrow said, “He had a good life.”

Each year on Groundhog Day, February 2nd, Wiarton Willie predicted whether or not Canadians would have an early spring.

6-ton statue of Wiarton Willie called "Willie Emerging"

The death of Willie's predecessor in 1999 caused the scandal known throughout Canada as “Williegate.” The groundhog in Willie’s casket was actually a stuffed imposter who had died years earlier! Apparently, the real Willie was too decomposed to be put on display.

This Wiarton Willie will be cremated. His ashes will be buried in a shrine next to the stone sculpture of Willie in Bluewater Park.

Infomaniac will keep you posted as to Willie’s successor.

Wiarton, Ontario

Notice Your Nuts

Testicular cancer is the most common cancer to affect men aged 15 to 45.

This viral ad encourages you to Notice Your Nuts.
(may take a minute to load)

So remember fellas… make your balls a bigger part of your life. Check yourself regularly.

Ugly Shoes

It’s time to revisit Shoewawa’s Ugly Shoe of the Week collection.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Pink Seattle Landmarks

A former Seattle landmark, the Lincoln Towing’s Pink Toe Truck now resides at the Museum of History and Industry. The left toe was donated to MOHAI and the right toe is parked at the Lincoln Towing yard on Aurora Avenue North.

The Pike Place Market opened in 1907. The pink neon sign and clock were installed in 1927.

Here are a few pink landmark photos I took in Seattle...

Pink pachyderm neon sign at the Elephant Car Wash on Battery Street

Elephant Car Wash, serving Seattle since 1951

Marquee of the Lusty Lady peep show

The Lusty Lady is conveniently located at 1315 1st Avenue, near the Pike Place Market and across the street from the Seattle Art Museum