A peek at ‘the week that was’ with a whole shitload of Infomaniac’s readers.
Let's get started with a visit to those filthy Yorkshire poofs...
TAZZY AND PIGGY:
Tazzy and Piggy give Portland Bill a hand job
We pick up where we left off last week as Tazzy and Piggy experience Easter in SmuntyLand aka the Dorset coastline.
Taz and Pig join Stevey (Smunty The Cabin Boy) and his fag hag wife Carly (Mong-Smunt) in climbing the Portland Bill lighthouse.
A brave Carly Mong-Smunt leads the timid girlie boys up the steep stairs of the lighthouse. This is a woman with cojones. And a lovely arse which we'll get to in a moment.
Carly Mong-Smunt: A woman with big balls (and big tits!)
Previous to the outing to the coast, back in the hotel, we were subjected to pics of Tazzy and Piggy’s turds. Explore at your own risk.
STEVE AND CARLY (THE SMUNTS):
The Smunts relate their twisted fantasy version of Tazzy and Piggy’s trip to the Dorset cuntryside.
Steve goes down on Portland Bill (practicing for later that night when he'll become Taz and Pig's cabin boy)
TWISTED LIE NUMBER ONE: Steve claims he’s not giving head to Portland Bill but rather “getting all Godzilla” on its ass. LIES!
Full moon over the English Channel (Carly's Arse)
If you can’t be bothered reading their excessively long account of the visit, just play the brief YouTube video of the group descending the stone steps of “The Cobb” harbour wall. Here’s your chance to hear the voices of The Smunts, making them just that little bit more frighteningly real. Listen to that posh bitch Carly’s accent. “Don’t make me lahhhhhff.” Which, coincidentally, is the same thing she says everytime Stevey gets nekkid.
TWISTED LIE NUMBER TWO: Stevey claims the homosexuals were trying to grab his legs on the way down but see for yourself. It didn’t happen.
Read Taz & Pig’s account, then The Smunts' account. Decide for yourselves.
Awa clicks a pic of this chick with a dick…
Lady Piggy of Barnsley
Frobi reports on Snoop Dog’s court appearance.
Snoop Dog: The bitch who stole Frobi’s wig
WW (SNIPPETS FROM SPACESHIP ORION):
WinterPeg’s WW is having an avatar competition.
May I make a suggestion?…
HE (HOMO ESCAPEONS):
HE posts a loving tribute to his wife...
Just before she crushed his head with her mighty thighs
FN is snowed under by an avalanche of vintage douche advertisements.
“The only thing strong enough to combat the foetid stench of a stanky cooter is the same thing mechanics use to clean out the grease pit: CONCENTRATED PINE SCENTED AMMONIA!”
Maidy finally succumbs to public pressure to replace this stupid orange baseball cap.
Proving yet again how much she loves Canadians, Maidy decides to replace it with a Toronto Blue jays cap.
Maidy takes offence when I suggest she forget the cap and just cover her head with a paper bag.
Canada’s famous Wawa Goose statue
And proving how much he loves Canadians (doesn’t everyone?) Geo goes out shooting with his camera and takes a pic of a Canada Goose. In Massachusetts!
No long border crossings for them, eh?
Tony’s been to see His Bobness in Sheffield.
He’s been there and got the t-shirt.
The usual busy week on Old Bitter Balls as, amongst other pursuits, Knudsen plays Spin the Bottle.
Rich the snitch
Rich blows the whistle on Old Knudsen, who, it seems, has been soliciting sex in Beantown.
Knudsen: Offering sex for a tenner
This week on Leatherette Beanbag: Lady boys and puking midgets.
Or “Eddie Waring: A Day at the Office.”
SID (STUPID IRISH DADDY):
Manflu gone! But slowness in posting still there!
SID, post something new you lazy Irish cunt.
Vet loses hand to crocodile.
Surgeons in Taiwan have reattached a vet's arm, after it was bitten off by a crocodile as he tried to give it an anaesthetic injection.
Tickers compares driving to anal sex.
PRUNELLA DE VILLE:
“What's pink and cute and can travel at 600 mph?”
Extreme cuteness alert as Pru informs us about Helly Kitty Airlines.
Jim Carrey gets on Geoff’s tits.
Betty’s listening to “any music which is the antithesis of Snow Fucking Fucking Patrol.”
IVF (INEXPLICABLE DeVICE):
IVF put us on hold while he was out on maneuvers (Manhoovers).
But the wait was worth it as we finally get to see the winsome witch himself…
This witch is a sexy bitch
Chelly claims she’s posted this Nigel Harman fan montage for me but that little minx wants him bad.
Kav puts his foot in his mouth (and pencils up his nostrils) and asks us to relate our foot-in-mouth incidents.
Kaz and her oral fixations.
This time it’s ice cream.
BOCK THE ROBBER:
I just like to quote random bits of dialogue from Bock the Robber…
Fuckin bastard. I'll find out where you live and I'll pour a nest of ants through your letterbox.
Fuck you, you fat prick!!
Well fuck me sideways
You fucking fool.
Was that the finest piece of satire ever to appear on Irish television, or the worst example of scum-sucking obsequious arse-licking you've seen in your life?
Scunthorpe won 2-0. They're promoted. Wooo hoooo!!
Spikey finds a mouse in his recycling “blue box.”
MUTLEY THE DOG:
Mutley resolves to be a kinder person.
“As I have no colleagues working with me in the partly converted toilet which serves as my office (still the gents!) I decided to be kind to strangers instead . Believe me this is not as easy as it sounds!”
BILLY (¡OYE BILLY!):
Billy’s given up on ever learning to drive and would prefer to spend the money for driving lessons on booze instead.
Bournemouth’s Hardhouse is back!
He’s been gone so long I was tempted to make him a “New Cunt of the Week” but you old-timers will remember him.
NEW CUNT OF THE WEEK
Another Brit joins Infomaniac. Welcome GLENDA of Flaming Nora!
“She writes. She blogs. What's she on about now?”
Glenda lives in London but she’s a displaced Mackem from Sunderland on the North East coast.
Not only does she amuse us with her blog Flaming Nora, Glenda writes and edits Corrie Blog; a blog for Coronation Street fans. AND she provides weekly Coronation Street updates over here. And she’s on the writing team of Dollymix.
Corrie's Jack Duckworth: “Flaming Nora!”
All this and she’s a Sunderland AFC supporter.
Everyone join me in clasping Glenda to your bosom and making her feel at home here on Infomaniac.