Fashion Tip

Canadian Ingenuity

Daniel Rotsztain made a video of himself walking through some of Toronto's busiest streets while wearing a machine that ensures he stays at least two metres (six feet) from others.

In order to avoid physical contact with structures, cars and other people, he's forced to venture out into the middle of the street.

Click here for the full story and the video clip.  

I don't know about you Bitches but The Mistress could really use one of these social distance machines. How is your social distancing going?

The Jockstrap Cup

A jockstrap is fine for supporting your "vital zone." But if you've ever received a slap shot to your "swimsuit area," you'll know that what's really needed is protection.

Enter a Canadian: Jack Cartledge.

Jack (who was a jock) filed a patent in 1927 for the hard-cup jockstrap while working at his father’s company, Guelph Elastic Hosiery. The cup was marketed under the name "Protex."

If you visit the Guelph Museum, you'll find a full-size Protex jockstrap and cup. (Your 2017 travel destination, Guelph, Ontario: Jockstrap Capital of the World.")


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The Guelph Museum also houses a pair of miniature novelty jockstraps. These tiny jockstraps were stretched around highball glasses. The Mistress remembers similar mini novelty jockstraps from her family's cocktail parties, back in the day. "Hilarious!," thought a young Mistress....

So the next time you receive a blow and you walk away relatively unscathed, thank Canadian ingenuity.

Fancy a Fag?

You Bitches know how much Mistress MJ enjoys smoking accoutrements (but not smoking). Well look what Norma found!...



An automatic fag vendor!

Actors can do other things besides act. Lew Cody, for instance, blossomed out as a full-fledged inventor when he applied for a patent on an ingenious cigarette vender patterned after a movie camera. One turn of the handle on the camera and a cigarette is ejected from the lens barrel, as demonstrated in the photo.

Queer Little Device

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Arse-Kicking Machines

User-operated amusement apparatus for kicking the user's buttocks



Bend over, rotate the crank, and the boots on the blades of this apparatus will give you a good kick in the arse.

Butt hold on! This guy…




Bob Booth


… claims to have the World’s Only Ass-Kicking Machine.




Alleged “World’s Only Ass-Kicking Machine” in Wirtz, Virginia.



“Bob reported that at least once, the thing "started up by itself," and, well, kicked his ass.”


And yet another arse-kicking machine found on eBay. Possibly belonging to Heather Mills…






I can’t keep up with the arse-kicking technology!


What use would you have for an arse-kicking machine?