Blogging from Beyond the Grave

I bring news of our dear friend LX (aka XL aka Mr. Lax, etc.) who departed this world some time ago.

LX's profile photo (one of his beloved Siamese cats.)

 

I'm sure I'm not alone when I say that I miss his presence, his sense of humour, his good nature, and his comments.

Recently, in 2023, I checked my Blogger spam folder. I'm in the habit of checking the folder on a regular basis so there shouldn't have been any comments older than 2022. Imagine my surprise when there were comments I'd never seen before in my spam folder dated 2010. 

Considering that I'd checked my spam folder multiple times during the past year, I was stunned to find comments from 2010! How did those 2010 comments suddenly show up in 2023?

And do you know who those comments were from? LX!!! See for yourself ...

Click on image to enlarge. I found these comments in 2023 in my spam folder written by LX although they're dated 2010, and although he died a few years ago, and although I've been regularly checking my spam folder and couldn't possibly have missed comments from 2010 during previous checks.

 

I'm thrilled to have been visited from beyond the grave but what do you Bitches make of all this?

Happy Thanksgiving

We here at Infomaniac wish you American Bitches a Happy Thanksgiving. In memory of our friend LX aka Mr. Lax, we present his signature dish: TRADITIONAL CRANBERRIES.

As Mr. Lax said, "This is my signature dish for both Thanksgiving and Christmas as it is the perfect companion to turkey. I suggest beets as a vegetarian option."

The First of July

July 1st holds special meaning to The Mistress. It's Canada Day; it's Norma's birthday; and it's the day that our friend LX posted his first comment on Infomaniac, back in 2008. Click here to be carried back to days of yore.

In honour of all three events, The Mistress offers you Bitches the most Canadian of cakes: a lumberjack cake...

The Mistress is not in the most celebratory of moods. Why?  Because LX (aka XL aka Mr. Lax) has published his final blog post.  

LX has been the Official Infomaniac Pillow Fluffer and Personal IT Consultant to The Mistress for many moons. He is a loyal friend to us all.

And you know that "Banned By Infomaniac" sticker that you've all received? Some of you NUMEROUS times? That's LX's creation...

The Mistress is in denial that LX may not be hanging about to celebrate future festive events with his signature dish: the traditional cranberries recipe...

Ingredients:

1 can jellied cranberry sauce

Preparation:

Remove both ends of can.

Push product onto plate.

Slice.

The Mistress has deluded herself into believing that he is using a health issue as an excuse; an excuse to get out of entering his limp ficus (again) in the upcoming 9th Annual Infomaniac Garden Photos Contest.

LX, if we must see you off, The Mistress will see to it that you are hooked up intravenously to the Vodka Fountain. 

Oh, and Mr. Lax? You're a winner. You never really had to ask...

LX's Garden Photo

The next entry in the EIGHTH ANNUAL INFOMANIAC GARDEN PHOTOS EVENT is LX from Texas. Take it away, LX!
 

This is a ficus (Ficus benjamina ?) plant. It is not mine. It is in my doctor's waiting room. I figure I have paid for it many times over. So this is my entry this year.

Did I win yet?

Note: The Management reminds you that the Garden Photos Event is not a contest.

LX's Garden Photos

Our next entry in the Seventh Annual Infomaniac Garden Photos Event ( I said event, not competition) is LX.

He's got some 'splainin' to do...



He says, "As I no longer have a yard, or garden, or house plants for that matter, I must submit a garden item from the supermarket.

This year it is cranberry sauce! Just imagine it suggestively giggling inside the can!"

Goin' to the Chapel

Recently, during LX's two-week river cruise from Amsterdam to Budapest, he and Herr Mago stopped in Würzburg to light candles in Unsere Liebe Frau von der Streifen Unterhosen Chapel also known as Our Lady of the Stripey Pantyhose...



Won't you join us in prayer?

Sausage Roll, Anyone?

Following kabuki zero's out-of-control Sissy Boy Slap Party last evening in the RUMPus Room (thank you, Cookie,) everyone was a little peckish.


[via]

Thankfully, LX whipped up some sausage rolls in the kitchen. Feel free to take a nibble as he comes 'round with his tray of delights.

Pull Up To My Bumper Baby

LX is driving around town this weekend, cruising for chicks, with the 3.5 straight men who read Infomaniac...



Good luck, fellas.

Kilt Inspection

Readers of LX's blog have been told that LX is supposedly taking a wee holiday in Scotland this week.

What you don't know is that Mistress MJ has dispatched Agent "MacLX" to Scotland to research the answer to the question, "What do Scots wear under their kilts?"

Agent MacLX has completed his task and submitted THESE revealing photos to share with you...


[via]



[via]


[via]

Thank you (thenk ye!) intrepid Agent MacLX, for taking on this daunting research assignment.

July 1st - Triple Hap-Penis

Mistress MJ returns briefly to celebrate the following THREE events:

1. Norma's birthday...



Please help yourself to Norma's cake. There's plenty of cake (and Norma) to go around.


2. Canada Day...



Thanks to fellow Canuck, Huggy Jon for the photo. I believe these are Huggy Jon's own undergear or "bobettes" as they're known in Québec.

And finally...

3. LX's fifth anniversary as "Official Infomaniac Pillow Fluffer and Personal IT Consultant to Mistress MJ."

Here we see Mistress MJ attempting to school LX in "How to Talk Canadian, Eh?"...

[via]

Now, if we can only teach LX to say "zed" instead of "zee," we'll be making some progress.

As usual, the Vodka Fountain and the Gincuzzi are in full swing.


[via]

Fire up the barbecue, Bitches!

Banned By Infomaniac

Don't let THIS happen to YOU...


(logo created by and awarded to LX)

And you think being sent to the Oubliette is punishment?

The following is a partial list of offences and reasons YOU could be banned for life here on Infomaniac:

Wearing offensive footwear, particularly CROCS.

Mentioning Celine Dion.

Asking "Did I win yet?" too many times.

Ignoring contest deadlines.

Not using a towel on the furniture whilst nekkid.

Emitting bodily fluids, especially vomit.

Failure to submit a photo of your backside to our Gallery of Alluring Arses.

Voting Republican.

Meanwhile, Somewhere in Germany…

As you may know, Mr. Lax (LX) has been vacationing in Germany for the past few months but has just returned home to Texas.

Infomaniac has obtained photographic proof of what actually went on when he visited fellow Infomaniac Bitch, Herr Mago, at an undisclosed location, somewhere in Germany…


[via]

Kitchen Queen Contest Entry #2 - LX's Traditional Cranberries

Kitchen Queen Contest Entry #2 - LX's Traditional Cranberries



TRADITIONAL CRANBERRIES

This is my signature dish for both Thanksgiving and Christmas as it is the perfect companion to turkey.

Ingredients:

1 can jellied cranberry sauce

Preparation:

Remove both ends of can.

Push product onto plate.

Slice.

Did I win yet?

"DID I WIN YET?"

The award for “The most repetitive and most reliably asked question from any Infomaniac Bitch” goes to LX aka Mr. Lax.



You win, Mr. Lax!

Thanks to our very own Princess for creating this award.

LX Does Berlin

Some of you may be wondering, "Where is LX?" aka "Mr. LAX."

He's gone to Berlin for a few weeks but we hope he'll be posting travelogues from abroad and/or popping by to comment from time to time.

Unless, of course, he's too busy...



AND rumour has it that he'll be meeting up with Herr Mago in Franconia!

Shopping Nekkid

Here we see either Mago or Von LX (who can be sure from that distance?), somewhere in Germany, shopping for cheese (Käse) and sausages (Wurst)…

[via]

Mojo Risin’

Mistress MJ has regained her blogging mojo thanks to the many Infomaniac bitches who left comments or emailed following the loss of our long-time Infomaniac bitch, Mr. Mutley.

And those of you who posted a little something for Mistress MJ on your blogs…I refer to XL and Beast.

XL:



You are all familiar with XL: Infomaniac Official Pillow Fluffer and Personal IT Consultant to Mistress MJ.

XL went far beyond the call of duty by test-driving (at great expense) new pillows for Mistress MJ.

As XL’s reward, Mistress MJ plans to spend a day fluffing his pillows for a change.

Read about XL's adventures in pillow testing here.


BEAST:



And then there’s Beast…the cheeky bugger.

In an attempt to, and I quote, “join me in wishing Mistress MJ a speedy return to her Mojo,” Beast had the nerve to post about Mistress MJ’s beaver!

And some nonsense about a “manglewurzel” which is, I suspect, something imaginary made up to confuse us Colonials.

Read more here.


Note: A special thank you to Miss Scarlet, who can always be relied upon to keep the uppity Beast in his place when Mistress MJ is at her wits end.

XL: American Gigolo

Astute readers will have noticed that on Valentine’s Day, our friend XL was discovered merrily hopping from blog to blog, asking several women to be his Valentine.

Let’s hear what a couple of our readers had to say about this, shall we?

KAZ: “XL is a cad and a bounder.”

Roses: “XL is a bit of a tart.”

We here at Infomaniac would like others to step forward if they too have been approached by this roving Romeo.

And if so, what can be done about his womanizing ways?

Or should we all share the love?

You decide.

Make A Deposit

(subtitle "Tits and Ass"...see Update)

Mistress MJ is taking a couple of days off to attend to important business.

Make a deposit in the slot below if you want Infomaniac to return on Filthy Friday …


[via the fabulous Jason]

UPDATE!

Happy Birthday, XL!

Mistress MJ just found out through Miss Savannah that January 20th is an extra special day.

‘Tis the birthday of Mistress MJ’s Official Pillow Fluffer and IT Consultant, the wonderful XL!



Please join us (after you’ve made a deposit in the slot) by wishing XL a happy birthday.

Note to XL: How is it possible that you weren’t on Infomaniac’s birthday list? Apologies from The Management.

The Bright Side of Life

It has come to Mistress MJ’s attention that two of our readers are dealing with serious health issues.

XL is having prostate problems. Bend over, darlin', and I’ll give you a second opinion…




And Robyn has been diagnosed with thyroid cancer. Mistress MJ kicks your cancer in the crotch, Miss Robyn. I tell it to fuck off, right now.





No doubt there are others amongst us experiencing difficulties of all sorts. Therefore it is Mistress MJ’s duty to cheer you all up with a little ditty that never fails to lift her spirits. It’s even better than Fukitol!


For the benefit of the accent-impaired Yanks in the audience, I have taken the liberty of transcribing the lyrics, below the video. (song starts after a brief spoken word segment)…



Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistling]
If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle. That's the thing.
And...
Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the right side of life,
[whistling]
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.
Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...
Always look on the bright side of death,
[whistling]
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
[whistling]
Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke. It's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...
Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the right side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]