Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Foot Vagina

While I was tidying up from the party, I found this…









Okay, which one of you pervs left behind the vagina foot?

And what on earth were you planning to do with it?
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43 comments:

  1. Old Knudsen12:55 AM, April 15, 2008

    I left my Jesus hand with the vagina nail hole in it somewhere.

    why do I never get invited to yer parties?


    never mind I think I know.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Old Knudsen12:55 AM, April 15, 2008

    ho hum first!

    ReplyDelete
  3. BEAST2:36 AM, April 15, 2008

    Its mine Miss MJ , I use it to hold my pens at work.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Devine Dora5:04 AM, April 15, 2008

    Walking around bare-foot would be a very different experience indeed.

    But not on the beach...nothing worse than sand in your crack. or in other places.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Daisy5:43 AM, April 15, 2008

    oh ffs...and i thought i had seen everything...i never would have thought someone would to be inserted INTO a foot...

    beast...that would not surprise me...for some reason..

    ReplyDelete
  6. Brad Stitt6:20 AM, April 15, 2008

    A foot is 12 inches I have more than that to offer you my lady MJ.

    ReplyDelete
  7. KAZ6:41 AM, April 15, 2008

    What a cute chocolate bar dispenser - is that a TWIX?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Miss Smuggersham7:00 AM, April 15, 2008

    I think it might be a Picnic bar. It's all lumpy.

    ReplyDelete
  9. The Mistress8:06 AM, April 15, 2008

    KNUDSEN: You can come to my next party but you have to bring food.

    No, your kebab doesn’t count.

    BEAST: Your pens?

    Or your bananas?

    DORA: You don’t fool me.

    I know you never take off your Birkenstocks.

    DAISY: You mean you’ve not tried this at home?

    BRAD: I hope you’re talking circumference.

    KAZ & T-BIRD: Aside from my HobNobs addiction (which I developed thanks to you lot) I’m more of a savoury person than a sweets person.

    I’d use it for fish fingers.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Geoff8:54 AM, April 15, 2008

    Stop pussyfooting around.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Betty9:05 AM, April 15, 2008

    My foot looked like that when I had a giant verrucca scraped out.

    Er, anyway ...

    ReplyDelete
  12. The Mistress9:22 AM, April 15, 2008

    GEOFF: I’ll stop pussyfooting around if you stop beating around the bush.

    BETTY: Wart did you say?

    ReplyDelete
  13. eroswings10:06 AM, April 15, 2008

    Wow, that's a whole new meaning to slippery when wet ;)

    Does it do a tap dance when it experiences a happy period?

    Talk about a foot in one's mouth...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Jenny10:16 AM, April 15, 2008

    Hey! That's my flower vase. Or at least that's what I thought it was. Damn it. It better come back clean.

    ReplyDelete
  15. The Mistress10:21 AM, April 15, 2008

    EROSWINGS: There's no such thing as a happy period!

    *rips out uterus, throws it in Eroswings' face, has crying jag followed by maniacal laughing fit*

    BOXER: I will thank you to take your stinking Titan arum elsewhere.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Tatas11:06 AM, April 15, 2008

    *rips out uterus, throws it in Eroswings' face, has crying jag followed by maniacal laughing fit* Isn't that just one of your normal days MJ?

    ReplyDelete
  17. The Mistress11:18 AM, April 15, 2008

    TATAS: Bitch, I'll show you a normal day.

    *removes Tampax and lobs it at Tatas' head*

    ReplyDelete
  18. FirstNations11:28 AM, April 15, 2008

    out of your FOOT??????

    wait wait wait.i've missed something here.

    ReplyDelete
  19. CyberPete11:58 AM, April 15, 2008

    Glad to see you got the Tampax back MJ

    That has got to be one of the most bizarre things I've seen

    What's that sticking out of the foot?

    ReplyDelete
  20. The Mistress12:09 PM, April 15, 2008

    CYBERPOOF: That's Kaz's Twix bar sticking out of the foot.

    Haven't you been paying attention?

    ReplyDelete
  21. CyberPete1:04 PM, April 15, 2008

    and why pray tell is Kaz's Twix bar sticking out of that rubber foot?

    Just wondering..

    ReplyDelete
  22. BEAST1:39 PM, April 15, 2008

    Do you reckon it was that heather Mc cartney , what left it behind.
    Wouldn't you also stick to wet floors ????

    ReplyDelete
  23. The Mistress1:49 PM, April 15, 2008

    CYBERPOOF: Our Kaz is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma.

    Only Kaz knows for sure.

    BEAST: I don’t know about sticking to floors but she stuck it to Macca.

    ReplyDelete
  24. INNER VOICES2:08 PM, April 15, 2008

    um... WTF? some people are into some weird shit? i can understand the bannanas in your ass, but, fucking a rubber foot? get a chicken or something for fecks sake!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Tatas2:24 PM, April 15, 2008

    MJ: Tampax? You'd need a sheep to put in your gaping wound. BITCH!!!

    Throws a sheep at MJ's head.

    ReplyDelete
  26. CyberPete2:39 PM, April 15, 2008

    He got off waaaaaay too easy MJ

    Waaaaaaaaay to easy, she deserved it ALL for giving it up to him for as long as she did

    ReplyDelete
  27. The Mistress2:43 PM, April 15, 2008

    VOICES: You’ve been giving the ‘bananas up the arse’ some serious thought, haven’t you?

    Be sure to take pics and forward them to me.

    How about you and Beast inserting bananas and taking your show on the road?

    TATAS: This one might be big enough to stop your snatch.

    CYBERPOOF: Maybe he’d like to try a Dane next.

    You’re available, aren’t you?

    ReplyDelete
  28. CyberPete3:14 PM, April 15, 2008

    For the amount Heather got

    HELL YEAH! I'll hold the rubber foot for him if that tickles his fancy

    ReplyDelete
  29. Anonymous4:00 PM, April 15, 2008

    I thought it was for footjobs not an insert! I guess the girl doesn't come with the package? Nice nails!

    ReplyDelete
  30. The Mistress4:31 PM, April 15, 2008

    CYBERPOOF: Well now we know your price.

    MYTOES: Trust YOU to notice the nail polish!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Tickersoid5:14 PM, April 15, 2008

    This is what happens when some cunt wants to bare their sole.

    ReplyDelete
  32. INNER VOICES5:57 PM, April 15, 2008

    "so much for getting kicked in the groin and not enjoying it any more..."

    and perhaps we could call our road show "beasts beautiful backside banana bonanza band!" featuring voices on the drums....

    ReplyDelete
  33. The Mistress6:17 PM, April 15, 2008

    TICKERS: *sniggers*

    Maybe their lover was a heel.

    VOICES: And MJ on butt bongos.

    Butt Bongo Fiesta!

    ReplyDelete
  34. INNER VOICES6:22 PM, April 15, 2008

    *stares off into space and daydreams about beast, bananas, and "butt bongos". shudders and washes brains out with gasoline*










    yeah, i made you come back just for that.

    ReplyDelete
  35. The Mistress6:24 PM, April 15, 2008

    VOICES: And how long have you been having these dreams about Beast?

    ReplyDelete
  36. The Mistress6:26 PM, April 15, 2008

    FN: Ack!!!

    I didn't see your comment from hours ago.

    It's Voices and Beast's fault.

    They were baring their bottoms at me.

    ReplyDelete
  37. INNER VOICES6:35 PM, April 15, 2008

    "bottoms up" takes on a whole new meaning. and i guess "put your foot in your mouth" does too.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Daisy6:50 PM, April 15, 2008

    no MJ...i was waiting for beast but he never...came...

    ReplyDelete
  39. FirstNations6:57 PM, April 15, 2008

    i'm sorry; i've torn out my own eyes and cannot comment.

    ReplyDelete
  40. FirstNations6:57 PM, April 15, 2008

    ..that wasn't a comment.

    ReplyDelete
  41. The Mistress7:11 PM, April 15, 2008

    VOICES: Foot in mouth...sounds like a disease.

    Which reminds me...

    Would you like me to give you something for your verbal diarrhea?

    DAISY: Beast stood you up for Voices.

    FN: Please refer to the Braille edition of my blog.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Romeo Morningwood11:31 PM, April 15, 2008

    Geoff was too funny!

    I suppose that there are some ETs out there who already have these...
    but foot vaginas would be too far away from the breasts...you'd have to ba an NBA playa to reach the dials...
    and besides, what would podophilacs do?

    It would certainly put a stop to foot binding in the Orient...
    and don't you think that women are already overly obssessed with footwear? It's just a plot to 'force' women to go out and buy a whole new set of shoes with nobby little insole thingamabobs.

    If this happened you'd all be 'jellin' 24/7.

    Oh it's not a prosthestic procedure it's just a toy..
    (ahem)




    never mind.

    ReplyDelete
  43. The Mistress1:00 AM, April 16, 2008

    DONN: That Geoff's a card, I tell ya, a CARD!

    Yes, it could well be a plot carried out by the shoe lords Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo to force us to purchase more shoes.

    *hurriedly clears space in closet*

    I'm curious as to how you clean these things but I think we've explored this topic long enough, don't you?

    ReplyDelete

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