Infomaniac will, from time to time, seek out the perviest perverts and parade them pantless in front of you, the judge and jury.
THE PERV: Nicodeme Petion, 41.
THE PLACE: Fort Pierce, Florida.
THE PERVERSION: Petion told police he was “just relaxing in the park” when they found him sitting in his car with his pants undone.
Police patrolling the community park say they saw Petion sitting in the driver’s seat of his car with his pants open and a sock over his genitals. According to a police report, Petion told officers his pants were open because he was hot.
Also, officers found a black and red book bag with 11 condoms, a pamphlet on STD awareness, Latina babes pornographic magazine, two white ankle socks and one black sock with possible seminal secretions.
THE PUNISHMENT: Petion was charged with lewd or lascivious exhibition and cited for driving while his license was suspended. He was being held on a $50,000 bail.
Perhaps Mr. Petion should join Infomaniac’s group for cocks and socks.
I do appreciate your public service annoucements.
ReplyDeleteAnd I really appreciate....
FIRST FIRST FIRST
I hope those policemem had a pair of tongs on them so they didn't have to touch any of his 'stuff'?
ReplyDeleteIs the man mad??? is he not aware of the dangers of athletes foot , he could end up with a warty wand.....Oh Hello IVD
ReplyDeleteTonight on CSI: Perv we examine the seminal value of a sock drawer near you!
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine being the coppers having to deal with that? Ugh.
People are so judgmental, especially judges.
ReplyDeletePoor bloke was just going about his business.
ReplyDeletePut a sock in it MJ.
I think the $50k bond is a bit harsh.. unless.. he was a perve AND a sock stealer!! Any word on that MJ? Were the socks illegally procured..?
ReplyDeleteDamn sock stealers..
Oh, he's going to be very popular in prison. Once the other prisoners find out what he's in for, they're going to use him as their genital sock!
ReplyDeleteIt socks to be him!
On a related note, those Red Hot Chili Peppers: Has the socks on the cocks been ruled out as the cause of the Salmonella food poisoning that spread across the country recently?
ReplyDeleteHe was suffering from a slight case of dementia ... the poor bastard was also wearing condoms on his feet.
ReplyDeletewhat a charmer!
ReplyDeletewish i had waited until AFTER i put my socks on this morning to read this...
ReplyDeleteBOXER: It’s not enough for you to be competitive in the boxing ring, is it?
ReplyDeleteIVD: Tongs?
Are those what mummy uses to pick up your pants to put in the wash?
BEAST: Who can forget the horror of seeing IVD’s warty wand? (click and scroll down to revisit)
T-BIRD: The cops deserve extra donuts for working on this case.
KNUDSEN: The jury is still out on that.
GARFY: You’re right, as usual.
Bless his cotton socks.
KIMBA: The socks have disappeared into that mysterious black hole, that Bermuda Triangle of missing socks.
ReplyDeleteHave a look in your sock drawer and tell us he hasn’t been in YOURS too.
EROS: Yes, but which member of the band is responsible?
Apparently, it’s all come down to a single chili pepper.
JOE: Condoms on his feet?
The U.S. is sadly trailing behind the rest of the world in sex education.
MANUEL: So charming you’d think he’s Irish!
DAISY: Check for telltale stains!
It all sounds pretty normal to me .... compared with what I usually find round here.
ReplyDeleteis it pervy of me to enjoy being FIRST FIRST FIRST?
ReplyDeleteIt Reminds Me Of That Old Ian Dury song "Sock & Drugs & Rock N Roll"
ReplyDeleteOnce again, Heff has made the vile mistake of clicking on one of your post links. Maybe one of these days I'll learn.
ReplyDeleteOh for goodness sake... it was covered with a sock...
ReplyDeleteAs long as there wasn't a bottle of hand lotion sitting there I say no harm no foul.
KAZ: Sunny Spain has made you blasé.
ReplyDeleteI suggest you return to Manchester immediately.
BOXER: Your frantic firstness isn’t pervy but it borders on the maniacal.
I’m locking my doors tonight.
TONY: You don’t have to be a Blockhead about it.
HEFF: Infomaniac has gained control of your clicking hand.
Control of your mind is next.
Be sure to visit on Filthy Friday when you don’t need to click at all.
CATSCRATCH: Since he was in his car, he simply reached for the WD-40.
tube socks? is that what those are for... at costco here they are selling gold toed socks... now i understand what they mean... always so informative over here...
ReplyDeleteThat reminded me of a Danish comedy band that made a song called something like Cocksocker. Unfortunately I can't find a link or mention anywhere.
ReplyDeleteAnyway it was hilarious.
Why would he want to sit in his car wanking into a sock? By the look of things he wouldn't have too much difficulty getting a shag.
VOICES: Yeah, Costco sucks, er, socks.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Was the band called The Pikslikkers?
what the question should be is "wtf was he looking at in the park..."?
ReplyDeleteVOICES: He was reading “Latina Babes” for the articles.
ReplyDeleteNo, I believe they were called "Lex & Klatten" which does have a kind of sexual innuendo to it.
ReplyDeletemy bad... i usally bring my porn to the park as well... damn.
ReplyDelete$50,000 bail? That strikes me as a bit excessive.... not commensurate to the crime. Again, WHO was the victim here?
ReplyDelete:)
He seems like a nice young fellow. I say he was framed.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Dirty Danes.
ReplyDeleteVOICES: Speaking of parks, you treat your body like it's an amusement PARK.
MATT: The sock is the victim.
MAIDY: Too bad he doesn't live closer to you.
Maybe for you he's willing to travel.
has anyone coined "lets rock out with yer socks out!" yet... just wondering....
ReplyDeletewould i be on the merry go round, bumper cars or the haunted house in the park...
VOICES: You are Insanity...
ReplyDeleteA truly mind-bending experience!
thats my man FLEA there in the crosswalk, dammit. do not 'sploit Flea. FLEA DA MAN.
ReplyDeletehas anyone gone for the 'foot long' gambit yet? you know, socks, feet, 12 inches....
um..
yeah.
NATIONS: FLEA has pubic LICE and is trying to conceal them with a 12-inch (longer than necessary, no doubt) sock.
ReplyDeleteYou have TICKS caused by spending too much time in the tall grass by the GIANT TOILET PLANTER in your front yard.
I do admire a bloke who is organised. Well equipped for the purpose, plus taking care of his mess and protecting his poor car at the same time. . lol
ReplyDelete11 condoms. .interestin' the guy has got stamina or wishful thinkin'..lol