Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Men in Hats

If you want to get ahead, get a hat.
-- British Hat Council

If you want to get some head, get a hat.
-- Infomaniac

My name is Tony Blair and I endorse this posting.

Join us as we celebrate The Men of Infomaniac and their stylish headgear.


Seen leaving ASDA with his latest purchase, Piggy asks, “Does this hat make my arse look big? Or just my left nipple?”


Trend-setter Tazzy has successfully captured that “I’m out on a day pass from Bethlem Royal” look.


Knudsen sports his trademark pee-stained cloth cap in a style befitting a real ladies’ man.

When asked what message he’s trying to send to the fair sex with his cap, Knudsen had this to say…

“It’s a look that says come back to my bed-sit no that’s alright yer gurlfriend can come too gosh her Adam’s apple’s big. Sit yerselves doon on that mattress on the floor and get those knickers doon around yer ankles and when it’s over bring me a cuppa tea.”


Here we see Smunty Steve going for the “chicks dig me” look in a jaunty Yorkshire flat-cap whilst attempting to conceal the conical point of his chrome dome.


Frobisher in his wighat proves that it takes one helluva big man to be such a little lady.

This is a look that says, “Howz about you, me and a bottle of Buckie down by the Bournemouth Pier?”


Ladies, let this this smokin’ hot Canuck cowboy lasso your heart.

He packs a big pistol and wears a hat that says, “I’d like to get my spurs into you, baby.

BINGOWINGS (Eroswings)

Here’s another cowboy we’d like to ride bareback.

You can leave your hat on. But lose The Shorts!


Tickers message to the world is, “I’m probably just a a little bit poofy.”


This kool kat Kentish man gets his kicks from Kerouac.

Dig the beret. It gets him the swinginist chicks.


This member of the military’s Knob Squad wears a cap that says, “I like to sneak up from behind and give my ‘brothers in arms’ what they want what they really really want.”


What are you doing here?

Bitch, get off my blog!

This is for the MEN of Infomaniac only. Your strap-on doesn’t fool me.


CyberPoof, I said the MEN of Infomaniac. Not the boys.

As English is your second language, you are forgiven.

But don’t let it happen again.

Attention-seeking ho.


“Bald patch? What bald patch?”

And finally, back to them

Everyone knows that a monkey looks good in a Tiny Fez, but why should monkeys have all the fun?…




Tazzy Fez-Pants

"My name is William Hague and I doff my baseball cap to The Men of Infomaniac."

“Hats off to the Men of Infomaniac!”


  1. As an ex paratrooper (twice removed) I must complain about the excessive use of hats in this post.

  2. My Word you've been busy!

    Imagine my relief when I discovered that you had included the Prince imitating his idol and surrogate Mother, Hatie McDaniel, the happy slave 'Mammy' in Gone With The Wind.

    Oh how I get a charge out of hearing him say, "I don't know nuthin' 'bout no babies", in that Brrritish accent.

    Always cracks me up.

  3. Thank you MJ for putting me off my breakfast. I have some questions
    1.Why is Frobisher wearing a blouse aswell as a wig ???

    2.Why is there a deformed willy on the wall behind Piggy.

    3.Can I have the mango from Tickers hat.

    4.What happened to SID's bra cups

  4. hats? what hats?

    I just saw cowboy boots ...

    *goes back to check*

  5. Get Ahead get ahat!

    No pictures of Beast in his favourite pink fedora????

  6. SID's is remarkable! He may just be starting a trend with that look.

    Still a fat cunt though, which sort of distracts the eyes from the hat.

  7. Piggy and his Fez. Looks like a Mr Whippy shit on top.

  8. GARFY: Don’t get your knickers in a twist.

    HOMEY: Damn right I’ve been busy so don’t go expecting anything of me tomorrow.

    As for Prince Charles, aren’t you thinking of “Candle in the Wind?” Not “Gone with the Wind?”


    1) Never mind Frobi’s blouse. You’re lucky you can’t see how high his hemline is.

    2) I don’t have insider info on the deformed willy but isn’t Bedpost Piggy cute to the left of him?

    Imagine the nighttime high jinks they get up to with that hand puppet!

    3) Help yourself to a mango. Tickers is ripe for the picking.

    4) SID’s been on a crash diet. I have a photo of the new slimmed-down SID which I’ll publish soon.

    BITTERSWEET: I want to see them in chaps.

    FROBI: Send me the photo and I’ll post it.

    I pictured Beast more in mauve.

    PIGGY: See comment to Beast re SID.

    GEOFF: I think we’ve seen enough here today.

    Don’t make me consider a Hats Entertainment II or Hats Entertainment III sequel.

    Unless you have a photo of Betty in a hat?

    TATAS: Who is Mr. Whippy?

    Someone in the S&M community?

  9. If there are any pictures of me in a hat, they won't be appearing on the internet, thankyouverymuch.

    However, the beret that Geoff's wearing belongs to me. It's from the early 1980's: that's my excuse anyway.

  10. I shall bring a 'Kiss Me Quick Sombrero with a Donkey on it' back from Sunny Spain in readiness for the girls' event.

  11. BETTY: Are you sitting down?

    Not only do I wear berets but I have them in a variety of colours.

    KAZ: Gaa! That’s what Les and Cilla brought back to Coronation Street from their trip to Spain.

    Could you bring me back Javier Bardem instead?

  12. What a marvellous bunch.

    I always look ill at ease with a hat on. I'm glad I wasn't alive when they were compulsory.

  13. BILLY: I picture you in a Pete Doherty style Trilby.

    But not looking nearly so sozzled.

    And with better footwear.

  14. No Chuckie LOOKS like Hattie in that headgear.
    I did mean Gone With The Wind..
    You forget how OLD I am?

    and did you have to put me right beside that stud? For crissake show a little compassion. I can't compete with that? Eroswings has a visible waistline and everything!

  15. Old Knudsen gets my vote. Stylish, functional and pee stained.

  16. TONY: I have a photo of your peachy bare arse yet no pic of you in a hat.

    Funny old world, eh?

    HOMEY: I forgot how old you are since you started using that avatar of the 18-year-old Homey. I see you're back to present day so-called "mature" Homey.

    You're right beside the stud, yes, but you're also underneath Frobi in his wighat and high hemlime (invisible but I know how high it really is, the slut). So DOUBLE HA!

    T-BIRD: Knudsen?

    I see you have impossibly high standards.

    What are you doing HERE, in that case?

  17. I can smell that pee from here.

    Knudsen's been eating asparagus again, hasn't he?

  18. IVD: From whence cometh thou oh wizardly one?

    You slipped in there whilst I wasn't looking. I'm sure you hear that line a lot though.

    You're lucky I didn't Photoshop a Harry Poofter cap onto your crown.

  19. Chicks dig me, guys dig me........

    Hey, even I dig me!

  20. SMUNTY: Since you dig yourself so much, I’m sure you’ll be very happy on your date with The Enchantress tonight.

  21. I am shocked and appalled
    By ....well ....everything

  22. Oh ha ha!


    *laughs an even more evil laugh*

  23. FN: Have you no self-control?

    BEAST: Jealous because YOUR pic’s not here?

    I wouldn’t know which man to put you under but I don’t imagine you’re all that fussy.

    SID: Don’t laugh.

    You’ll crack your makeup.

  24. How DID I get into that lot?

    And I don't have a strap-on ... now. Fucking thing broke. So much for that "lifetime guarantee".

  25. Are these people famous? I only view movies not television.

  26. So what you're really sayin is that I'm bringin' ssssexay back?

  27. MAIDY: “Lifetime guarantee” doesn’t mean using it three times daily and more on weekends.

    You probably used that thing more times than you brush your teeth.

    BRAD: They’re legends in their own minds.

    HOMEY: What’s that I hear you singing?…

    'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean
    And I do my little turn on the catwalk
    Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk
    Yeah I shake my little tush on the catwalk

  28. Thank the lord we didnt get to see Piggy wigs helmet

  29. Beast can keep his hands off my mango!

  30. They are all striking! Yes... very ... ermmm ... striking! I notice you did not use my hat shot...

  31. The future king of England? I don't know what's worse--his Aunt Jemima do rag, or his coral snake tie...


  32. I'm singin'

    "Men in hats

  33. BEAST: Or his ginger merkin.

    TICKERS: Can Beast help himself to your banana?

    MUTLEY: The world has yet to recover from your arse shot.

    BINGOWINGS: And that rose in his lapel?

    A fashion ripoff from our former Prime Minister,the late Pierre Elliott Trudeau.

    HOMEY: Sing along..

    We're men... we're men in hats that are tight
    We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right.

    We may look like sissies
    but watch what you say or else we'll put out your lights.

  34. TICKERS: All that time I was nagging Beast for a photo of his bare arse and it was right in front of me!

    I feel obligated to post this pic on my blog at the next opportunity.

    Thank you, Tickers.

  35. dear sweet jesus on a red bicycle.

    now i want a



  36. No picture of your own Dutch Cap in there I see!

  37. FN: Would you like fudge sauce with that?

    ELLIE: Only my gynecologist sees that.