Thursday, February 14, 2008

An Infomaniac Valentine

I am the gorilla your dreams.


  1. Yay! I'm a Valentastic first!

    I might be here for some time as I trapped in my house - The amount of Valentines cards shoved through my letterbox has filled the living room. I'm going to have to tunnel my way out!

    Or something.

  2. iVD: Get it? VD=Valentine's Day. Never mind.

    "Shoved through my letterbox" and "tunnel" might be euphemisms for what, exactly?

    Your letterbox doubles as a gloryhole, doesn't it?

    *snozzles IVD affectionately*

  3. Hey MJ - Happy Valentine's to you!

    I'd go ape over you, but the lipstick is just over the top limb, and I ain't bananas yet. But for monkeying around...

    Probably just the start of bad ape jokes, but let the party begin!


    My bits are washed just in case.

  5. NWT: I’ve applied lipstick to the opposite end as well.

    KNUDSEN: It could have been worse.

    I could have posted 2 things you hate even worse than gorillas.

    1) A YouTube.
    2) Lemurs.

    Worse still, I could have posted a YOUTUBE (with soundtrack) of a LEMUR!

  6. What's a gloryhole???!

    As a wildlife biologist - I find gratuitous pics of wildlife to be offensive. Except when lipstick and Knudsen are involved...

    Knudsen + gorilla + lipstick = ????

    I'm sure he'll come back with some witty repartie (reparte? - fuck it) to this one, but I'm gonna duck anyhow.

  7. Happy LURB Day! I am working and eating and eating and....uh, eating.

    It is my goal one day to have an arse bigganuff to sit on Piggy and smother him with one cheek.

  8. Awa: A size zero model could smother Piggy with one cheek he's that small.

    MJ: Happy Valentines. I got you a lifetime supply of Canestan.

  9. Lipstick Jungle!

    I see Brooke Shields finally took care of those caterpillar eyebrows...

    Happy VD, MJ!

  10. Bah!

    Where are my flowers and chocolates?

    And I wish Blogger would stop fucking around with the comment options.

  11. That gorilla's had a makeover -
    Mohican and lip implants...and he still doesn't do it for me.
    Happy Valentine's mj.

  12. NWT: A gloryhole is the slot the postman uses for special deliveries.

    Knudsen and lipstick? Are you implying that Knudsen’s a gurlyboy?

    AWA: Your booty is a beauty.

    For maximum damage, let’s get SID to sit on Piggy.

    CONNIE: Did you nick the Canesten from Tatas’ supply cabinet?

    Her yeast count will skyrocket now. Is that a bun in her oven?

    BINGOWINGS: Brooke’s career has been all downhill since she groomed her eyebrows.

    Now show us some Texan totty and email me a photo of your bare arse.

    PIGGY: I have a half-eaten Mars Bar for you.

    You know where to find it.

    KAZ: Would the gorilla be more attractive to you if you knew he owned the Stolichnaya company?

    Now where’s my Tesco Value Valentine Card?

  13. I love this picture! I'm going to be giggling about it all day long. Hopefully in inappropriate places.

  14. animal sex... hmmm... gorilla style.

  15. I wouldn't mind some bush in the bush, but she looks too intelligent to me.

    I can't be doing with these intelligent women with ideas above their station.

  16. DINAH: Point to your places and I’ll tell you whether or not I think they’re inappropriate.

    VOICES: You just come here lookin’ to perv out, don’t you?

    GARFY: Don’t give up on her.

    I’m sure she could dumb it down for you.

    And I’ve heard that she likes Irish arse.

  17. alas im am here for the stimulating conversation and informative links... does any one else want a breakfast shot of jeager?
    *pounds double shot and goes back to work*

  18. Can a gorilla give a BJ? I know Lemurs can. A Gloryhole is the attic of a hoose.

    You lot and yer crazy sexual desires, it makes me sick and aroused.

  19. Wow you are hairier than Manuels arse

    Nice shade of lippy though - is it dirty crackwhore red?

    Happy VD

  20. VOICES: I’m pleased that you recognize an educational blog when you see one.

    Please be advised that you will be punished if you don’t do your homework.

    KNUDSEN: "Can a gorilla give a BJ?"

    Yes, apparently so!

    Yes, it’s another YouTube. Bear with me just for today.

    CYBERPOOF: It’s blowjob red. It’s smearproof!

    I can get you a tube.

  21. May your VD be a good one!


    Like last years x

  22. SID: I’ve run out of that ointment you sent me.

    Scratch my itch, you lovable fat-arsed Irish cunt.

    Now bend over. I have a Valentine pressie for you. x

  23. Hey! How did you get a picture of me pre- facial depilation?

  24. *bends waiting*

    Ha WV cnutsyous

    Sweet for VD day EH?

  25. T-BIRD: I found those ads you did for Epilady.

    SID: Come closer.

    *stretches tongue toward Norn Iron*

    cnutsyous youcuntyou

  26. *notes wart on above said tongue*

    No need for piercing that MJ.

  27. D.PRINCE: A cuddle to you from one Canuck to another.

  28. SID: You dirty bastard, you snuck in from behind.

    You Catholics like to use the back door, don't you?

  29. Happy Valentines day you old bag

    ***makes kissy , kissy noises***

  30. BEAST: And to you, you slack-arsed, stained-anorak-wearing yokel.

    *makes squishy squishy noises*

  31. Valentine's day- Here on the East Coast almost over for another year. thanks for the visit.

    Do not mind Mutley- I am sure you cannot always believe everything he says. I am sure his bark is louder than his bite.

    I am from Comox orginally. Spent some time Beach combing on Wreck Bay enjoying all the very wild, wild mushrooms that used to grow there and various other plants that were used for Medicinal purposes.

  32. TARF: Mutley can bite me. I’ve had my shots.

    I’m originally from Ontari-ari-ari-o and can’t wait to move back there a.s.a.p.

    Mushrooms, eh? You sound like a fun-guy.

  33. I hate to be a party pooper but see the large crest on the back of the head..
    that's a boyrilla!

  34. Catholics?

    Back door?

    Roses are red,
    Chocolate is bitter,
    Tonight my love,
    I'm shagging your shitter.

  35. MANUEL: There's a little something for you in the tip jar.

    LORD T: The gurlyboyrilla has been exposed!

    SID: SID!!!