Monday, March 12, 2007

Blogging Roundup

A peek at ‘the week that was’ with (more than!) a handful of Infomaniac’s readers.

We begin this week's tale in the Welsh town of Pontyhotpant...


TICKERS
:


Tickers’ new shaggin’ wheels

Tickers gets a new old banger.

When I commented on what a chick magnet the new wheels must be, Tickers responded, “So far it seems only to be a sheep magnet. Them's ma bitches.”



OLD KNUDSEN:


Old Knudsen (Old Bitter Balls) celebrates International Weeman’s Day.





A note to you single gals out there looking for love; Knudsen likes a woman he can stick his willy into but who is also smart and funny and can make a good cuppa tea.

Ladies, I know you look at Knudsen and think, “How could an old Hornivore like Knuddie give me the pleasure I seek?” Read him daily and mark my words… he's moisture-inducing.



The filthy old bugger tricked me into looking at his willy!

And if you're into humping plastic, read Knuddie’s take on playing with dolls.








STEVE:



After a week of us staring at that horrid purple Nebula template, Stevey finally did some fine tuning but the result is still hard on the eyes.

Aside from that, he’s posted a pic from Piggy's childhood…




To save you the bother of having to click on his slow-loading site, I’ve pasted some of his text as follows…

Wonder which one is the wee squinty queer little fuckstain himself?

It’ll be the one out on his own - refusing the teat of his mother and waiting for a milk producing cock to come along so he can suck away on that for a while!






KAZ:






With Kaz this week, it’s all about love and folksinging.




FIRST NATIONS:

FN attended the ABATE motorcycle swap meet and wondered if we’ve ever asked ourselves the question…







TAZZY AND PIGGY:




Don’t click on Tazzy and Piggy’s blog if you want to keep your breakfast down.

Disgusting coupla cunts.

They’re probably going to be without any Internet access for the next week or so. You can still visit their blog, if you’re foolish enough to. But it may mean we don’t hear much from them on ours for a bit. Yay!




FROBI:


Shut up. I couldn’t reduce the pic.



Frobi, always with our best interests at heart, warns against the health hazards of smoking off aluminum foil.



WW:


Winterpeg’s WW (Snippets From Spaceship Orion) alerts us to Things At Work That Can Kill You.





and the composition of the male brain...







AWAITING:




Awaiting wants to know if you want to get lucky.

What? Oh my mistake.

Awa wants to know what makes you lucky.

Note: Awa has “fuckered up” her Internet connection and will not be back online until she get’s her new DSL modem in the mail.





HE:




HE (Homo Escapeons) takes us to the movies with Children of God and 300 and asks us, “DO YOU ANTICIPATE A CATASTROPHIC FUTURE
OR A GRUESOME REPEAT OF THE PAST
OR ARE WE DESTINED TO JUST PLOD ALONG?”

Yes, HE always shouts like that.





GEOFF & BETTY:


Both Geoff and Betty have posted links to ‘Shaggy Blog Stories: a collaborative blog-stunt for Comic Relief.’
The concept in a nutshell:
What I’m proposing is to assemble and publish – in the space of just seven days - a paperback anthology of blog writing, that can be sold to raise funds for the charity.

For Brit bloggers only. No Canucks need apply.



EDDIE WARING:




Eddie’s auctioning off a pair of Marlon Brando’s underpants.




IVF:






IDV (Inexplicable DeVice) shall henceforth be known here as IVF.

Piggy deposits a big turd in IVF’s toilet.



MAIDY:



Sexy bitch Maidy


Maidy finally sent me a fresh pic so we don’t have to look at that damned orange baseball cap yet another time.

And isn’t she a foxy bitch when she loses the cap?

Love that sexy librarian look. Although obviously it’s not a library she’s working in. It’s the call centre where she works as a phone sex operator. Look there on the wall. It’s the first dollar bill tip she got from a punter. Dirty bitch.

Anyway, this week Maidy introduced us to her friend Lily.

Lily’s a new blogger and you can find her on Lily’s Ramblings.



Lilly of Philly





RICH:






Rich of Beantown Caffè asks “Are Horn Players Better Kissers?”




KAV:





Kav (That other Oirish cunt. As if we needed another) wears his jumper to bed and doles out handy bathroom tips.

Kav, you’re still not as stupid as Stupid Oirish Cunt (below you) but you’re gaining on him.



SID:


SID (Stupid Irish Daddy or The Original Oirish Cunt) asks us to leave a caption for this pic of Dr. Evil (Ian Paisley) pointing to Piggy’s arse…








PAMER:





That lazy Canuck Pamer finally posted something with the excuse that he recently resigned from his job, celebrated his birthday and bought a MAC.




FARMER GILES’ COCK BLOG:

The Woman Who Only Wanted Me For My Cock – Part Five.

The tension mounts.




CONVICT:




Connie, update for fuck’s sake.




And finally…

WELCOME NEWCOMER TONY!



Tony “Zimmy” Zimnoch. Another cunt from Yorkshire


Welcome Tony Zimnoch from Bench blog.

Tony hails from Hebden Bridge in the UK. Not far from Yorkshire’s fave poofs, Tazzy and Piggy!

Tony’s a West Ham supporter. You hear that Geoff? You’re not alone anymore!





And he supports Halifax Town & Halifax Rugby League too.





But most of all, Tony’s a music lover extraordinaire as the many gig pics on his blog reveal.

Well that and the fact that he has a Cystoscopy video on his blog set to music.

And speaking of Cystoscopies…

Aside from an undisclosed “urinary infection” (word has it his pee was burning) … Tony is a healthy specimen who can take whatever muck we throw at him.

So go on and give him a proper Infomaniac welcome. He’s all healed up now. You won’t catch anything.

22 comments:

  1. I'm on the same round up as Paisley yes I am crying, tears of joy of course. That film the 300 looks a bit ghey doesn't it? can't wait to see it, a Spartan King with a Scottish accent MURRDAR! he shouts as he kicks some bloke in the hole. Rich is a good kisser but I don't know if that's anything to do with his big horn, as for Tony he makes me cringe and cross my leg on a regular basis.

    ReplyDelete
  2. MJ makes me cringe and cross my legs. I also cross my fingers, toes and eyes just to be on the safe side.

    As for that Tony....

    Well, thats enouh about him. Discovering he was a fucking West Ham supporter made my mind up for me.

    That and being from Hebden Bridge.

    *trots out, singing a wee song about relegation*

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks mj for including me in your world famous blogging round up.

    Perhaps WW will confuse me with Kav now which is an improvement on Taz.

    *ducks*

    ReplyDelete
  4. Welcome to the Monkey House, Tony.

    We're all quite normal and very friendly. Even I am, for a psychotic American pergnant bi-sexual bitch.

    MJ, if you look at that dollar, Dink's pic is on it.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great, I love these posts - saves me looking round!

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  6. I was reading a book last week. I have now finished it so I may update this week.

    But there's a big pile of books calling to me ...

    ReplyDelete
  7. KNUDSEN: How much Guinness did you have to pour down Rich’s neck to get him to kiss you?

    That Tony looks shaggable if you’re thinking of switching teams. I’d uncross yer legs right now if I were you.

    TAZZY & PIGGY: *does splits over Taz and Pig’s faces*

    KAZ: I’m going to have to set up some kind of Kav/Kaz/Taz coding/glossary on this blog.

    WW will go out of his Canucklehead mind.

    MAIDY: Oh, I see the Welcome Wagon Lady has arrived.

    Monkey house? Well that Piggy has a big pink baboon arse so I suppose you’re right.

    That dollar has your child’s pic on it? You disgust me. I know where that dollar’s been.

    FROBI: Lazy cunt.

    CONNIE: You’ve finished reading The Cat in the Hat?

    Do you use your finger to read as you go along?

    ReplyDelete
  8. No I don't you cheeky bitch.

    But my lips move while I read.

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  9. CONNIE: Only because your finger is stuck up yer arse.

    ReplyDelete
  10. well........Now that Im famous i might as well pull up a chair>Im surprised anyones even heard of Hebden Bridge.We are all gentle (albiet shaggable)Hippy Folk........not really "proper Yorkshire" like Barnsley.......were the men are men & the sheep are worried....!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Gentle Hippy Folk. He means soppy cunts.

    We'be heard of Hebden Bridge. We'd never set foot in the Gawd awful place though. Even though it's only a few minutes away, the desire to visit is galaxies away.

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  12. *laughing at Steve's pic of piggy's youth so hard that I am now chocking*

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  13. Oh yeah, I'm back up.

    *mumbles something about nobody caring*

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  14. Sheep worried??

    If it has a pulse it should be worried.

    Even things without pulses have been known to shudder at the thought of the men from Barnsley.

    ReplyDelete
  15. TONY: Is that patchouli I smell?

    PIGGY: Not surprised you wouldn't visit any town that doesn't have the word "penis" in it a la 'Penistone'.

    AWA: We care. But this is Tony's day so stop trying to hog the spotlight you little Diva.

    SID: You should know. Didn't they spend a weekend at yours? Though they told me that after 5 or 6 Guinness you were anybody's bitch.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Everybody's bitch MJ...everybody's bitch!

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  17. 5 or 6?

    It only took a half!

    And SB! She kept plying us with cheap wine and touching our willies!

    Lifted her wee floral dress and showed us her lady-garden, so she did.

    Twice.

    ReplyDelete
  18. SID: Hooer.

    PIGGY: A half? Hooer.

    ReplyDelete
  19. What do I know from YELLING!?
    I hear Frank Costanza narrating to me when I write.
    YOU WANT YELLING!!!
    I'LL GIVE YOU YELLING!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. HE: La la la can't hear you (fingers in ears)

    ReplyDelete
  21. Never try getting a sheep into the back seat of a three door car.
    Trust me.

    ReplyDelete