Women Who Pee Standing Up

Following yesterday’s “Men Who Pee Sitting Down” we bring you the female counterpart; Women Who Pee Standing Up.


I know, I know. I should have saved this posting for tomorrow: International Women’s Day.

What’s today then? Election day in Northern Ireland?






Piss on it. Let’s get started.



Ladies:

Wouldn’t it be a relief to relieve yourself freely like a man?

Sick and tired of long public restroom queues?

Do you acrobatically “hover” so as not to make contact with the filthy, syphilis-ridden toilet seat?

So what’s a gal to do?





Thankfully, we live in a day and age where manufacturers are hard at work catering to our pee fantasies.

Infomaniac presents . . . PEE GADGETRY!



URINELLE

Very simple to use. The URINELLE hygienic cone is held with one hand and springs into its correct shape simply by pressing either side. Its anatomical shape has been tested and adapts to all women. Thanks to its wide edge, there is NO RISK at all of urinating to one side of it and getting your clothes wet.

NB: The use of the Urinelle could feel strange at first. Be aware that the tube will feel warm.




P-Mate

The P-Mate is basically like a cardboard shoe with the toe cut off. You place the entrance of the 'shoe' directly under your urethra, between your legs, pee into the shoe and then make sure that the hole at the toe end is funnelling the urine out somewhere other than on your feet.

The Whiz





“We're the company whose products let women pee standing up like a guy, just by unzipping their fly.”

The Whiz’s claim to fame?

The Whiz Plus has helped three British women complete an arduous 580-kilometer to the magnetic North Pole.




Stadium Gal





The Stadium Gal is an undetectable female leg bag or “female urinary pouch.”

If astronaut Lisa Nowak had only known about Stadium Gal. An alternative to driving cross-country in a diaper.





TravelMate

The TravelMate cradle is designed to fit comfortably between the labia majora (the outer lips) and over the labia minora (the inner lips), forming a leak-free seal with the female anatomy. The urethral opening is then temporarily enclosed within the cradle so that urine has only one way out— down the tube and out through the tip. This patented design is why we’re able to make the TravelMate so small and discreet.

There’s no need to worry about breaking it. That’s because the soft, flexible, yet durable medical-grade plastic is a type that springs back to its original shape after being sat on, twisted, or otherwise bent.

River rafters, divers and other boaters will appreciate that TravelMates accidentally dropped in the water will float.

WHIZZY

(image will appear below in a second)


Write your name in the snow with the Whizzy!

Whizzy is a device that enables a woman to urinate from a standing position like a man. It is formed of heavy paper that slides virtually flat between your legs and opens to form a trough. Its unique and patented shape, angle and easy-grip handles make it very easy to use. It adjusts to each user's anatomy and stance. You stand naturally, with no bending or straddling necessary. It is disposable, and fits easily into purse, pocket or backpack.

It’s time for some market research. Go off and try some of these products and report back to us.

And tell us your “pee standing up” stories.

In the meantime, I’m gonna try out some of these gadgets to see how far I can pee. How much do you want to bet I can pee farther than some of our male readers? Especially SID. No contest there.