Monday, August 04, 2008

Who Wants A Cuddle?

I'm feeling positively uplifted today.

If you're not feeling as bouncy as me; if your swizzle has lost its fizzle; come closer.

Who wants a cuddle?


  1. First? First?


  2. I once believed the fastest way to a man's heart was through his chest with a knife but you have opened my eyes to new possibilities. Thankyou mj for helping me to 'think outside the box'.

  3. You will have someones eye out with those

  4. Come closer?

    I think not. Never mind having someone's eye out, you take someone's entire head off with those!

  5. I'm getting uplifted now.

  6. Holy crap! Those things are dangerous, could poke an eye out or something!!!

  7. Dangerous?
    naah - they's just go 'POP'.

  8. Inter continental ballistic missiles.

  9. BOXER: The point is that you need sedation.

    But a cuddle might do.

    ANGELA: I feel so very Zig Ziglar now.

    Send me your credit card details and I can arrange more words of inspiration.

    PIXMAKER: Put that thing away.

    You'll have somebody's eye out with it.

    THE REST OF YOU BITCHES EXCEPT KAZ WHO IS DRUNK: If you lose an eye, Infomaniac has a Braille edition.

  10. GARFY: Trust an Irishman to bring explosives into the scenario.

  11. It took me 2 minutes to notice she'd black hair.

  12. you could put an eye out with those.....

  13. Madonna called.

    She wants her boobs back

  14. Keep that bitch away from water bras !

  15. BBB: How many fingers am I holding up?

    MANUEL: Cheeky bugger.

    CYBERPOOF: To celebrate Madonna’s upcoming 50th birthday, will you be wearing a conical bra?

    Or just a set of pasties?

    HEFF: Sounds like you know a thing or two about ladies’ undergarments.

    I bet you can unhook a woman’s bra with one hand.

    Or with your teeth.

  16. There isn't much to celebrate is there?

    I thought she was at least 60 though.

    My mistake.

  17. Is she pointing to something in the sky?

  18. Eye out? fuck that it'll put yer balls out when you get a diddy wank.

  19. I kissed the screen but you took my eyes out. Those things hurt!

  20. CYBERPOOF: More like 70 judging by this pic.

    XL: The underwire in her bra is picking up signals from outer space.

    Using the same technology, she can exercise mind control over you.

  21. I bet she has trouble sleeping on her front. Is that Jan Collins by the way ??

  22. KNUDSEN & EMMA: Are the pair of you in cahoots?

    You just came through my back door when my back was turned.

    KNUDSEN: T-Bird likes a good "titty wank" if you're interested and she won't put your eye out.

    EMMA: La Liz isn't dead yet and already you've stolen her image.

  23. BEAST: For fuck's sake, bitches, I can only type so fast. Now it's Beast putting in his two cents. Er, pence in his case.

    Who is Jan Collins? Someone on British telly?

  24. type faster , you canadian slacker

  25. ****drums fingers impatiently***

  26. BEAST: Shut the fuck up.

    I'm getting cramps and you know what THAT means.

  27. Might I suggest a new bra from Lane Bryant. The torpedo look is so 1957.

  28. CATSCRATCH: Another one sneaks in through the back door.

    Oh all makes sense now why you're all coming through my back door today.

    1957 was a good year for Chevys.

  29. I hope for her sake that's photoshopped.

    She couldn't possibly go on tour looking like that unless she's sitting in a wheel chair just looking out at the audience the entire time.

    She could do that, her fans would probably pay no matter.

  30. "Our breasts are our WEAPONS"

    Tracy Lords, 'Crybaby'

  31. Why are you so damn perky today? Actually, I do need a hug. I shall get my protective eye gear first...

  32. CYBERPOOF: Do they make turbo-charged wheelchairs?

    I'm waiting for Andy Williams to tour again.

    NATIONS: My tits are 'Licensed to Thrill'.

    How about yours?

    RANDOM: That was me a few hours ago before the cramps set in.

    I hate everyone now.

    You should have arrived earlier.

    You've missed your chance for a cuddle.

    That goes double for the rest of you.

  33. I wouldn't know but why not?

    Who is Andy Williams?

  34. Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!

  35. *stares blankly as he remembers his old school babysitters, drools slightly*

  36. We'd like a cuddle. With us being nice, soft and fluffy it would be nice for you too.

  37. CYBERPOOF: Too old and too American for you to bother with.

    He's doing the Branson, Missouri lounge circuit now so that should be enough to put you off.

    PEEVISH: I run a tight ship, as you can see.

    VOICES: I'm getting a little sick of your various bodily fluids oozing all over my blog.

    PUPPY&HIPPO: Oooo I can't wait 'til you're finished your camomile teas!

  38. *wipes face, but shit eating grin remains*

  39. VOICES: That towel that you just used to clean your face?

    Old Knudsen wiped his knob with it.

  40. Sounds like you're ready for a cat fight. I've got some mean PMS myself so get ready to get your arse kicked!!!

  41. funny... i pulled it out of your top dresser drawer...

    *puts used towel back in drawer and runs off laughing wildly*

  42. Old and American?

    Are you sure we are not still talking about Madonna?

  43. This Ray Barrett is not that Ray Barrett.

    This pearl necklace is very tight. I think one should stick to the old rule and pearls (resembling tears) are only for widows. The bra is seemingly one of Hughes' less successful projects.

    Anyway, give my a cuddle, MJ! Come on!

  44. RANDOM: I blocked your kick with my hot water bottle. Ha!

    VOICES: What have I told you about upper and lower case letters and their use and abuse?

    Have you learned nothing at my bosom?

    CYBERPOOF: Andy’s 80.

    Madonna only looks 80.

    MAGO: The pearl necklace was a gift from Old Knudsen.

    You want a cuddle?

    Ahhh, come here ya big lug.

  45. YABBADABBAH DUUUHHH ... the following sounds are not reproducable within our system of letters ...

    Awww ...

  46. huh, yeah im not much for following orders... i is the way i is...

    thanks for the "pointers" anywayz...

  47. VOICES: Fine. If you can't follow orders I'm giving YOUR cuddle to...


    Get ready for round two, Mago.

  48. whew...
    didnt want to get any cramps on me anywayz... they sound awful.

    *shivers at thought of getting cramps on him*

  49. This comment has been removed by the author.

  50. ......and why are you working when you should be blog commenting.... hahahahahaa, oh right C A P I T A L letters... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA.....

  51. Good point!

    I'm sure he doesn't have bingowings and looks better than her in a leotard.

  52. HUNNY ... I am READY!

    Yay ....

    That could go ON AND ON ...

    ... quieeekk ...

    Jausa. Gimme a fag ...

  53. VOICES: I'm not working. It's a civic holiday.

    I'm at home moaning and writhing in pain.

    Occasionally I'm forced to reply here to the likes of you and dole out cuddles to those (like MAGO) who deserve it.

    CYBERPOOF: I can't really picture The King of Easy Listening in a leotard.

    MAGO: You want a cuddle or a fag?

    Both are plentiful here at Infomaniac.

  54. Beasty is

    come and get it while its hot y'all

    ps I am wearing ladies panties :-)

  55. Hach, "feel good" (James Brown). Sorry I forgot, used "fag" as the British WWI word for cigarette.

    As for madonna - come on, she's tired and worn on this picture. WOnder whether she had some teeth pulled for these "Bäckchen", this high cheek bone look. Read somewhere that this really was done. Think it is possible when you look at what Chinese and Russian women do to meet "beauty-ideals". But MJs are pure nature, I guess? Positively uplifting in any case ...

  56. BEAST: Oh my!

    They're crotchless!

    MAGO: I believe they're cheek implants gone wrong.

    Mistress MJ is all natural. Obviously you were not paying attention during our cuddle.

  57. Maybe i was a little "abgelengt" ... distracted ... one should always focus on the main subject ... did not grab it really at first ... it goes up and down und um und um by applying the right pressure ... yes I should concentrate more on your satisfaction, selfish me.

  58. ?
    Hubba bubba?

  59. MAGO: Hubba Hubba!

    You see now why she encourages cuddling?

    She's chilly!

  60. At the beginning is a wonderful two-second-sequence when she puts her hands to her hips and moves - I have no working speakers here, can't here here - casual is thew word, en passant, "chilly" the dictionary gives as "kühl" - she's in command. cool calm collected. Is that what you meant?

    What I like most is the "Unausgesprochenheit", adumbration - what a nice word mentioning the shadow ... ach, eros is not graphical. "L'origine du monde" better be hidden, a very interesting case. Sorry I am very tired now.
    Dita v. T. should be on your line, but I never saw her act or perform, just stills. There are interesting women of the art.

  61. Okay, now that's just sending out mixed signals. The smile says 'come here' but the porcu-boobs scream 'stay away!'.

  62. MAGO: Chilly = kalt.

    So few clothes to cover her body.

    EROS: Come hither.

    I know you want a cuddle.