Monday, January 05, 2009

Infomaniac Annual Review


Infomaniac 2008…HAI!

2008 on Infomaniac: What a year! Let’s look back, shall we?

NEW BITCHES:

First of all, we rolled out the welcome mat …


… as a bevy of new Bitches joined Infomaniac this year including (in date order):

T-Bird (January), Inner Voices (February), Savannah (March), Random Chick (April), Kookaburra (May), Gordie (June), Leah (June), Practically Joe (June), XL (July), Ponita (July), Hef (July), CSI Seattle (July), Maxi Cane (August), Ginro (September), Scarlet (October), and Famulus (November).

And many more!


SHUTTING UP SHOP:

Infomaniac got off to a rocky start in January when Mistress MJ nearly closed the doors indefinitely.





Things were looking dismal until our favourite Irish waiter came along to save the day. Manuel promised Mistress MJ a photo of his bare bottom if Infomaniac would remain open for business. How could we refuse?

Our hero: Manuel’s arse…




But it wasn’t just Manuel who swayed Mistress MJ’s mind. We wish to thank a host of other Infomaniac supporters who kept this boat afloat…

And here we are a year later, still up and running, thanks to all of you bitches.


AWARDS:

Infomaniac was the lucky recipient of several awards including the prestigious Knudsen Award for Most Filthy Blogger 2008






ENTREPRENEURIAL EXCELLENCE:

2008 was a year of new enterprises getting off the ground at Infomaniac:

Infomaniac Airlines took flight…





We created a retirement home for aging homosexuals





As a public service to lonely hearts everywhere we created a dating agency…



In a competition, we asked you to come up with a name for the agency and the winner was Old Knudsen who thought up this gem…

Fag, Hag and the Odd Slag Dating Service.

Many of you have had success with the Fag, Hag and the Odd Slag Dating Service but most especially Inexplicable DeVice (IVD) who hasn’t been blogging or commenting much lately since he achieved his new “smug married” status.



EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED:

You just never knew what would happen next on Infomaniac.

2008 was the year we discovered cake farts!...

Following everyone’s disgust with cake farts, we temporarily turned Infomaniac into a knitting blog


Mistress MJ’s knitted uterus was ceremoniously flung at Beast’s head but ended up in a tree


Many of you submitted photographs of your pussies and bitches…


Mistress MJ was kidnapped by the Yakuza!...





NEW SERIES:

A number of new series began on Infomaniac in 2008.

Perv of the Day:



In the Perv of the Day series, we seek out the perviest perverts and parade them pantless in front of you, the judge and jury.



Drunk of the Day:

The Drunk of the Day series title pretty much sums it up…we examine the wacky hijinks that folk get up to under the influence of alcohol.





Domestic Dispute of the Day:



In the Domestic Dispute of the Day series, we examine domestic quarrels that got out of hand.

*makes note to add more than one entry to make it a true series*



Plonker of the Day:

In the Plonker of the Day series we examine the ineptitudes of careless criminals.

*makes note to add more than one entry to make it a true series*



Perplexing Pic:

Not that I refrained from using “of the Day” in the title for the Perplexing Pic series.

*makes note to add more than one entry to make it a true series*



Your Favourite Post:

Your Favourite Post is a series that invites you, the readers, to submit your fave post as written by you on your blog.



Anyone who hasn’t submitted their fave post yet may do so at any time.


Celebrity Arse:

With the Celebrity Arse series, Infomaniac readers were invited to tell which celebrity’s bum they’d most like to see and we posted the results.

Here for example, was Donn’s choice.


Donn in close contact with Monica Bellucci’s buttocks



COMPETITIONS:

We here at Infomaniac love hosting contests and 2008 saw this fun-filled competition...

The How Not to Decorate Competition...


Winning entry



PARTIES:

Parties? Oh yeah, we had ‘em. Because we know you bitches love to mix and mingle and pee in the planters.

Remember The Sunday Social Potluck in April?



That’s where you were ordered, er, invited to click on the Infomaniac Blogroll and visit someone you’d never visited before. It was a huge success and several of you made new friends. Let’s do it again sometime!



The Pizza and Bongos Party to celebrate the ending of Mistress MJ’s 12-days-in-a-row work hell…





We threw a bitchin’ Pool Party!...




Yes, that’s where we first saw IVD show off his leopard print bikini…





Infomaniac’s First Annual Christmas Office Party



Who can forget when Geoff xeroxed his arse and broke the photocopier? Hilarious!


WRAPPING UP:

So this is just a sampling of the year that was on Infomaniac. There was so much more…naked old men in socks, nipple tweaking, naked gardening… you name it, we did it!

But we couldn’t have done it without you, the Infomaniac Bitches. You’re all barking mad but you’re all swell and we thank you for your friendship.

On behalf of the staff here at Infomaniac (Mistress MJ, The Houseboys, and The Infomaniac Dancers) we thank you for a great ’08 and we wish you health and happiness and houseboys in 2009.





Please be sure to tip the houseboys on your way out.



Note: No new posting ‘til later this week.

63 comments:

  1. Wonderful roundup--parties, tushes, winners, perverts, and domestic disputes--hats off to our favorite Mistress for a really great year!

    ReplyDelete
  2. My personal Infomaniac favorites for '08:

    Canada Day
    Summer Swim Party
    Christmas Party
    Promotion to MJ's Pillow Fluffer

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's been a stupendous blog year, MJ! I have enjoyed each and every post. You can be assured that my presence will continue to plague your blog frequently.

    Plus I got to meet up with Fammy and become his Head Concubine.... now that's service without having to go through the application process at the Fag, Hag and the Odd Slag Dating thing!

    ReplyDelete
  4. LEAH: We know you just come here for the pervs.

    XL: If it’s snowing in Seattle right now as much as it is up here, you’ll know my duvet needs fluffing too.

    PONITA: A pox on your plague!

    You and Fammy went behind my back rather than going through the appropriate Fag, Hag and the Odd Slag Dating Service application process.

    In lieu of punishment, you may make a cash donation. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Unbelievable Review!

    I remember that rocky start...and then You ended up having a banner year.

    You can never quit because this place is the glue that holds so many different types of people together..some arrive daily to see how far you'll push the edge of the envelope..some because they enjoy seeing pictures of creepy old fat nekked dudes with tiny wieners..and some like me who love your sense of humour.

    Thank You for staying the course and sticking it to the Man!
    You are also the hardest workin' blogger that I have ever seen.

    I look forward to 09.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I have quite a few rolls of pennies... I will lob them your way.

    Make sure you catch them or they could leave a nasty bruise.

    Circumventing your dating services was purely unintentional... but you know how it is sometimes at parties... sneaking off to one of the other rooms...

    PS - my cat still wants to play with your knitted uterus. And she promises not to drag it into the heating duct.

    ReplyDelete
  7. DONN: Oh geez, now the pressure’s on for ’09.

    You can never quit because this place is the glue that holds so many different types of people together

    But basically, you’re all a buncha pervs.

    PONITA: Seeing as your cat wants my uterus, I’ll have to lob those rolled up pennies at Beast.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Predictions for the upcoming year:


    January: A small speck of fluff spends nearly fourteen seconds hovering near the left nostril of a postman in Novocaine, Arizona.

    February: Infomanic falls in love.

    March: Infomaniac gets divorced, on discovering her new husband isn't ghey.

    April: Manuel's Arse turns out to be Ron Jeremy's Arse. He is exilled to spend the rest of his natural life on the 1443 westbound train to Little Stains. The speck of fluff get's it's own late night chatshow.

    May: Hardhouse takes an overdose of sperm. An unknown benefactor known only as "K" saves him by sucking it all out.

    June: Infomaniac accidentally posts some Info. Mutley the Dog turns out to be a real dog. Inner Voices starts hearing inner voices.

    June: Owing to an accident with a time machine and some nostril hair , 2008 had two Junes. The second was the same as the first, but hairier.

    July: Random Chick marries Corrie Cannuck. The photo of Piggy's Arse gains sentience and starts writing philosophical haikus.

    August: Old Knudsen Junior (aka Not Quite So Old Knudsen) surfaces, claiming his birthright to the leftmost five sevenths of The Holy Turd Of Saint Frobish.

    Twinkleberry: As part of Barak Obama's mandate of "Change", September is renamed. Canada rejects the reform, leading to nuclear war and nuclear winter. The winter warms up Canada marginally.

    October: Infomaniac gives birth to her non-ghey ex-husband's child, who is christened "Great Beast Bringer Of Eternal Torment Lord Of The Cursed Underworld Destroyer Of Souls". The world ends. The event is documented on page 15 of the Saskatoon Examiner.

    November: Hundreds of complaints are received when "Filthy Friday" is published on a Tuesday. When Mistress MJ fails to account for the error, she is forcibly baptised into the Moonies, just so she can suffer the ignominity of being excommunicated.

    December: See Feb 17th, 1943.

    ReplyDelete
  9. WHUUUHHAAAHAAA ... thank ya capt'n ... giggle ... höhöö ...

    ReplyDelete
  10. What a year you've had. Do they eat the cake after I wonder?

    I must prepare for August as you just never know.

    Thank you for being so filthy MJ my glue on the keyboard keeps my keys together.

    ReplyDelete
  11. KAPI: The Saskatoon Examiner only has 14 pages.

    Our Manuel’s sweet sugarloaf is much hairier than Ron Jeremy’s and I will thank you not to ever mention those two in the same sentence again.

    I’m booking an appointment to have my tubes tied immediately.

    Now wipe your face.

    What is that? Yogurt?

    MAGO: Yes, Kapi is a bit of a höhöö.

    KNUDSEN: Is Old Knudsen Junior your child with Stevie Nicks?

    Of course they eat the cake…and lick the icing.

    Are you giving out more awards for '09?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Our department has an Internet monitoring system, which tracks our Internet usage and the sites we visit.

    We are not allowed to visit filthy, dirty, low-grade sites that feature house boys and old man gay porn. If we get caught looking at sites like that, it's an automatic day off.

    Thank you for the two weeks free vacation in 2008!

    Let's shoot for three weeks off in 2009. Okay?

    ReplyDelete
  13. So, both you and Mutley disappear for a few days. Then, you and Mutley both write posts for your blogs at the same time! No, of course I won't read anything into that.

    ReplyDelete
  14. The review is so 2008 , now lets concentrate on this weekend whisking business.
    Did you pull ??
    Will there be more trainer clad severed feet found on beaches ???

    ReplyDelete
  15. What a wild ride in a wild year! Looking forward to more.

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  16. loved going back over the last year...had forgotten some things...well recessed them...i do remember meeting cyberpete through the sunday social potluck...i may have never visited his site if not for you and now i have a new friend...thank you mj :)

    i tried to tip the houseboys but the first one had his ass too clenched and my credit card wouldn't fit to swipe!

    ReplyDelete
  17. I'm still vexed by water in my ears from your Pool Party and I think your How NOT to Decorate Competition was my fav.

    ReplyDelete
  18. 2008: What a brilliant blogging year! Thank you, MJ (you may notice that I didn't cough or retch when giving thanks), for your unbelievably hard work and filthsome, depraved posts. Not to mention matching me up to SP with the Fag, Hag and the Odd Slag Dating Service. I don't know how you manage to squeeze it all in? On second thoughts, I don't think I want to.
    I think my favourite post was the Pool Party. After all, I got to show off my bikini and perv over a practically naked (although plasticky) Tim!

    Thanks again.

    * cough splutter *

    Sorry. Couldn't hold it back that time.

    ReplyDelete
  19. *basks in infomaniacs florescent glow*

    ahhhh.... 2008.

    ReplyDelete
  20. How can you top it in 2009 Miss MJ , will this be the filhiest year yet???
    I do hope so :-)

    ReplyDelete
  21. Mistress, it's been much fun. I shall continue to peek at your offerings for many moons to come.

    Sorry about sneeking of with Ponita, but needs must and all. The basement was a little scary, but many, huge thanks to FirstNations for rescuing us. That was an experience in its self.

    Following my first donation to your photo gallery, I shall see what I can find with which to make another...

    ReplyDelete
  22. Blimey, I'm pleased to be here for the start of 2009.
    Fanny of the day?
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  23. Thank you for the quality entertainent. I am relieved you stayed open.

    Kap: I'll make sure I am in Portsmouth during the month of May

    ReplyDelete
  24. Assuming that Scarlet is referring to 'Fanny' in the UK sense of the word - hell yeh!!! I think I've seen enough penis's for while so let's have a 'Fanny of the Day' MJ!

    ReplyDelete
  25. A Vintage Year.

    They should make You The Director General of the B.B.C. .telly would then be much more interesting !
    "Pervs On Ice-Superstars in The Jungle" Anybody?

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hang on a minute MJ, I just remembered how your mind works sometimes, lol, so I have changed my mind about a Fanny of the Day. No. Please, no. I want to keep my food down.

    ReplyDelete
  27. CSI: Be sure to click multiple times on Fridays.

    GINRO: Are you suggesting that Mr. Mutley and Mistress MJ are spies working on a “foreign relations” mission?

    CYBERPOOF: So much drama so little time

    As spoken by the Drama Queen himself.

    BEAST: There was no time for “pulling” as you call it at the annual Houseboy Management Conference.

    As for the trainers, if the shoe fits, wear it!

    ReplyDelete
  28. EROS: Wild ride…what are you inferring, cowboy?

    DAISY: Don’t blame me for foisting CyberPoof upon you.

    You visit him of your own volition and risk slipping on the glitter.

    i tried to tip the houseboys but the first one had his ass too clenched and my credit card wouldn't fit to swipe!

    That couldn’t have been one of my houseboys as their money slots are all quite slack.

    BOXER: Every time I see a crappy Chihuahua figurine, I am tempted to purchase it for you, the Crazy Chihuahua Lady.

    IVD: Speaking of slack money slots (see comment to Daisy), hello IVD.

    Until Mistress MJ sees proof of SP, she is convinced that you have an imaginary boyfriend and you’re really just too lazy to blog.

    And we can’t believe that you’re no longer working the docks.

    Where will all those horny sailors go now? Denmark?

    ReplyDelete
  29. VOICES: Please turn off the fluorescent lights.

    Mistress MJ prefers candlelight and frankly, that is the only light Beast looks good in.

    BEAST: Speaking of Beast…

    Top it?

    You want me to kill myself?

    FAMMY: I shall continue to peek at your offerings for many moons to come.

    *slap!*

    SCARLET: Fanny of the Day?

    Do you mean FAMMY of the day?

    It appears that Famulus is offering more of himself.

    ReplyDelete
  30. HARDHOUSE: And I’m glad you’re back!

    Could you please arrange to have the Portsmouth meeting filmed?

    GINRO: As Waylon Jennings sung, “Be careful of something that’s just what you want it to be.”

    TONY: They should make You The Director General of the B.B.C. .telly would then be much more interesting !

    Mistress MJ’s scribblings actually have been heard on the Beeb (Radio 4) but they’ve yet to recognize my true leadership potential.

    My first task would be to fire Richard and Judy and replace them with Beast and Mistress MJ’s Book Club.

    GINRO: Too late.

    Mistress MJ is already rifling through fanny fotos.

    ReplyDelete
  31. What does 'til later this week mean anyway?

    I'd tip that black fella to the left.

    Nice arse!

    ReplyDelete
  32. "Mistress MJ’s scribblings actually have been heard on the Beeb"

    [lightbulb]

    Mistress MJ is the love child of Wayne & Schuster!!! That explains the prodigious high-quality Infomaniac!!!

    ReplyDelete
  33. CYBERPOOF: Later this week means I’ll post on Wednesday or Thursday.

    In the meantime, there’s plenty of links to click on in this post to keep you busy and reminisce over the year that was.

    XL: Or the bastard love child of Bob and Doug McKenzie...who are brothers.

    SCARLET: Is Fammy in the remainder bin already?

    ReplyDelete
  34. See, this is why I come here every day. Who needs CNN? All the news I ever need is right here on Infomaniac. I mean, would I ever have found out about cake farts on CNN? I THINK NOT!!!!

    Love ya, MJ! Looking forward to a perverted 2009! Whooo hooo!!!

    ReplyDelete
  35. The only back I want to look at is that of the fine gentleman to the left.

    I think I'll be done by Wednesday so that works for me.

    ReplyDelete
  36. i am so excited to be here at the beginning of a new year! xoxox

    ReplyDelete
  37. RANDOM: You are granted special privileges here (what they are, we haven’t decided yet) for being the first to comment on Infomaniac in 2009.

    CYBERPOOF: So glad you could work me into your busy schedule.

    SAVANNAH: Try not to pee yourself.

    This blog isn’t self-cleaning, you know.

    ReplyDelete
  38. There's a Celebrity bum I'd like to request a photo of. Are you sure you are up to the task MJ?

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  39. Just thinking about the cake farts gives me wind.

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  40. Oh well, it appears that I'm out of fashion before I've even got started. Sigh.

    So, as I peer up out of the "Specials" do I see any hands coming my way? Is there any hope for poor old Fammy or is he destined to be cast into the Returns of life. Humph.

    Well! Think not that you can cast aside Fammy so quickly! Fammy shall emerge from the trash invigorated and renewed. He shall once more have his day.

    When, is another question, of course...

    ReplyDelete
  41. Didn't you hear?

    It's fleet week

    ReplyDelete
  42. Well I often wonder why a nice girl like me comes here every day.
    And now you've reminded me.
    Keep up the good work MJ!!

    ReplyDelete
  43. so really my ass saved the world.....again......awesome

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  44. *rifles through Remainder bin and hauls Fammy out*

    You are special, Fammy, and don't you forget it!

    So... which part of your anatomy are you going to send to MJ next??

    *wonders what MJ has planned for the fannies post*

    ReplyDelete
  45. A sterling recap to the year that was. I hope 2009 is going to be just as replete with Manuel's bottom!

    Happy New Year!

    ReplyDelete
  46. GINRO: Name your Celebrity Arse and we'll try to deliver.

    GEOFF: Yours is an ill wind that blows nobody any good.

    *refrains from sitting downwind from Geoff*

    FAMMY: Lucky for you, Ponita’s not fussy.

    CYBERPOOF: Isn’t it Fleet Week every week where IVD’s concerned?

    KAZ: Well I often wonder why a nice girl like me comes here every day.

    Are you wearing a Catholic schoolgirl uniform as you say that?

    MANUEL: Your sugarloaf has healing properties.

    Mwahhh!

    PONITA: You should be Fammy’s personal photographer.

    T-BIRD: Happy New Year!

    Everything goes better with Manuel’s arse.

    ReplyDelete
  47. MJ! Hey doll! What's shaking beside your arse! How I have missed your delish dishing! Happy New Year you sexy bitch! Love ya!

    ReplyDelete
  48. Absolutely!

    I'm so pleased they have swung past Copenhagen and neglected that NorWitch

    ReplyDelete
  49. Well, seeing as YOU are somewhat of a Celebrity...I think you know where this is going, lol.

    But I don't expect you to do this at all, being the quiet shy retiring type that you are, so just wanted to make the request regardless of the outcome.

    However, how about making it a new rule that women also send photos of their derriere's, not just the men?

    ReplyDelete
  50. ROBYN: It’s about time you came back!

    Happy New Year to you too!

    CYBERPOOF: Do you give a better deal than the NorWitch?

    GINRO: However, how about making it a new rule that women also send photos of their derriere's, not just the men?

    You have a blog. Use it. Invite the womenfolk to send you pics.

    ReplyDelete
  51. I have nothing to say other than I have never seen a 'fanny' so that would be nice...I cannot help that I am not either funny or rude.

    ReplyDelete
  52. If you do get into Fannies could you please label the 'clotorise' I am sure this would help a lot of readers...

    ReplyDelete
  53. Only if any good bloggers cum my way, everyone has been shite.

    ReplyDelete
  54. GINRO: You won’t know ‘til you try.

    CYBERPOOF: Spare me the details on what you get up to in your spare time.

    MUTLEY: To locate the 'clotorise', you will need a road map and a miner’s helmet …the kind with a headlight attached.

    We shall also attempt an expedition to the elusive G-spot.

    Bring enough food and water for 3-4 days and alert your next of kin as to your itinerary.

    KNUDSEN: And if they can afford the bribe money.

    I nearly went broke begging you for it.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Actually, MJ, I am fussy... but on occasion there is a real gem to be found in the Specials bin.

    I would love to be Fammy's personal photographer.... ;-D

    ReplyDelete
  56. Seems to me there was a recent pic of WW looking eerily like the Drunk of the Day.... was he trying to do a Nick Nolte impersonation?

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  57. JOE: At a fraction of the cost!

    ReplyDelete