Thursday, January 08, 2009

Hazardous Hairspray


"This was not just a little can of deodorant, this was a massive can of hairspray."

We here at Infomaniac know how folk love to shove wacky stuff up their arses.

So that’s why we’re presenting you with the following news item as sourced from The Sun

SHOCKED surgeons were forced to use their imagination after operating on a woman with a huge can of hairspray stuck in her bum.

Mirela Gradinaru, 37, arrived at the clinic in Arad, western Romania, in agony, begging docs to help.

But she refused to tell surgeons how the can came to be lodged in her rear even after a successful operation dislodged the canister.

Mirandolina Prisca, a doctor at the clinic, explained: "We had X-rays done to localise the object and then we carried out the operation. The patient was fine after it.

"She was very embarrassed. She was clearly in a lot of pain, however it got there."

"This was not just a little can of deodorant, this was a massive can of hairspray," said one hospital worker.




Note: If you haven’t already read Changes at Infomaniac, do so NOW.

59 comments:

  1. MAGO: Ladies and gentlemen, the Franconian bags first place.

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  2. Whether it's one of Devine's old cans?

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  3. That's a tricky one.

    She must have walked around her bathroom naked and accidentally fallen on the can. Bless.

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  4. MAGO: Mistress MJ has a can of Aqua Net Hairspray autographed by John Waters.

    Envy me.

    Ms. Nations does.

    CYBERPOOF: And the Dane weighs in.

    It's only a matter of minutes before the Brits wake up and put in their two pence worth.

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  5. Respect. A collector's item. I'd envy you if you had a first print autographed by van de Wetering.

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  6. MAGO: I'd envy me if I could pronounce van de Wetering.

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  7. It's a good job she stopped there. The curling tongs were next.

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  8. VICUS: Is that singed hair I smell?

    With the arrival of Vicus, the Brits have awoken, as predicted.

    That's my cue to go to bed.

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  9. Crap! I'm sorry.
    We both reached for it.
    She got it.
    I pouted.
    She laughed.
    I told her to stick it up her arse!
    I didn't really think she'd do it.
    It's just an expression!

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  10. i had a friend who worked in the ER here and he used to tell me all the "anal incidents" they used to get...it is amazing what really happens out there...we had a psych professor who got her german shepherd stuck in her bum and they had to actually put the poor animal down to dislodge him...in her class every semester...without fail...someone barks...

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  11. Very fascinating - but I prefer coloured pictures.

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  12. Which way up did she insert it? Could it still spray?
    Did she have a box of matches on her?
    Sx

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  13. The poor woman was probably confused after reading Justin and Bumfaces house make over book . The Phrase " An under used back passage is an ideal place for storage" is obviously very easy to miscontrue . IVD uses his to park his bike !

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  14. Doesn't she know that the Cold War is over? The Iron Curtain has fallen? There is no need to smuggle in Western products anymore.

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  15. From what I've heard, the Wii control wand is the new hairspray can.

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  16. [Besides: Where I am standing in the "yay-first"-rankings? First ten? Just curious.]

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  17. JOE: You don’t look the sort of fella who would have any use for hairspray.

    DAISY: Mistress MJ cannot bring herself to copy and paste that comment here.

    Much like Leah, I fear you have fallen in with a bad crowd.

    KAZ: Very fascinating - but I prefer coloured pictures.

    It’s never good enough for you, is it Your Royal Majesty of Manchester?

    Oh, and speaking of Manchester, I recently learned that it was originally known as Mamucium or “breast-shaped hill”.

    Now that’s fascinating!

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  18. SCARLET: Which way up did she insert it? Could it still spray?
    Did she have a box of matches on her?


    Do I look like a doctor, Miss Scarlet?

    BEAST: An under used back passage is an ideal place for storage" is obviously very easy to miscontrue . IVD uses his to park his bike !

    You have mistaken IVD for Mr. Frobisher.

    IVD uses his back passage to park his broom.

    EROS: Doesn't she know that the Cold War is over? The Iron Curtain has fallen? There is no need to smuggle in Western products anymore.

    We would appreciate it if she smuggled some Russian vodka to us.

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  19. LEAH: From what I've heard, the Wii control wand is the new hairspray can.

    Mistress MJ wouldn’t know about that as she does not travel in your type of social circle.

    *notes ciggie drooping from lip*

    Have you fallen in with a bad crowd, Miss Leah?

    MAGO: [Besides: Where I am standing in the "yay-first"-rankings? First ten? Just curious.]

    You’re on the rise.

    Boxer has fallen way behind and Leah and Eros haven’t been pulling their weight lately either.

    Interesting use of punctuation, by the way.

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  20. It's terrible to waste hair spray like that...couldn't she have stuffed a fire extinguisher up her ass instead?

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  21. Oh dear.... Fammy got a Wii Fit for Christmas. I hope this doesn't give him any ideas or we will be seeing his xrays posted here soon.

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  22. RANDOM: Or a bottle of seltzer water, like a clown?

    It’s become a three-ring circus anyway!

    PONITA: We’ll see what Fammy has to say about that, shall we?

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  23. It's a medical emergency as the propellant in the can is a gas!

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  24. My question is "Was the hairspray can full, or empty" ? Just curious.

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  25. XL: Evacuate!

    HEFF: If she has helmet hair, it’s half empty.

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  26. ? Interesting punctuation? I cut back very heavy. In German you can spray Kommata, Semikola and whatever you find over your text. The most frivolous use of these beautiful signs made Arno Schmidt. He makes the emoticons look pretty simple-minded. Sadly his writings are nearly untranslatable into another language, but he produced excellent translations of English texts.

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  27. MAGO: My favourite form of punctuation is the inverted question mark used in the Spanish language… ¿

    It’s brilliant as it prepares the reader for a question ahead.

    Same thing with the inverted exclamation mark… ¡

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  28. MJ ... I'll have to send you a picture of my back.

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  29. I like semikola, nearly extinct nowadays. There exist interesting accents too.
    If you like signs in general Otl Aicher's books are of interest. Yes, the name is right. Another fascinating area are signs on maps: Such an abstract little hook'n'crook can make one dream.

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  30. JOE: Send me a photo of your bare bottom while you’re at it.

    MAGO: You’re not just a pretty face, are you?

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  31. Shouldn't I comment?

    Oh well, who cares anyway.

    I am puzzled about the German sheppard.

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  32. Eh? Sorry, I am not too pretty. But have my aesthetically fulfilling sides too, ass you know. :)

    Basically I am reading for some time now.

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  33. CYBERPOOF: Lalalalala…I can’t hear you.

    MAGO: Speaking of “fascinating areas” where is that photo of your bare bottom you promised me?

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  34. You received it months ago.
    Ha, that's the way you handle critical data!

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  35. It's in the "not to be published"-folder.

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  36. MAGO: True, a photo of your muscular arse is safe in my private collection.

    However, since you’ve had semikola tattooed onto each arse cheek, I need an updated photo!

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  37. MAGO: Just do it.

    MAXI: And Yer Da is up mine.

    Dirty Irish bastards...you're all the same.

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  38. You don't see that kind of sick stuff in the Eastern part of Romania.

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  39. TROLL: Vlad the Impaler was Romanian.

    Coincidence? I think not.

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  40. I think Vlad the Impaler is lurking in a dogging site jsut outside Portsmouth Docks

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  41. BEAST: You’ve mistaken him for Mr. Frobisher.

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  42. pffft, that's nothing. Where's the flat iron?

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  43. *Oh, and speaking of Manchester, I recently learned that it was originally known as Mamucium or “breast-shaped hill”*.
    You made that up didn't you?
    If it's true I should know.

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  44. BOXER: Between you with your flat iron and Vicus with his curling iron, we’ve got the whole salon “behind” this.

    KAZ: Would I make this shit up?

    Proof here.

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  45. doesn't anyone wonder how her 'great egress' got great enough to accomodate a can of hairspray in the first place? that took some working up to. was she a former member of the olympic shotputting team? a heavy consumer of bran products? a latter-day la petomaine who strained her 'high c' attempting the 'Scream Scene' from Tosca? INQUIRING MINDS NEED TO KNOW!!!

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  46. MAGO: Are you dreaming?

    NATIONS: She may have been a champion bowler for all I know but I am inclined to go with Beast’s “parking lot” theory.

    You would have to consult with Mr. Frobisher for details on how it’s done.

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  47. you should ask for readers to send in xrays of their own arses.....just to see.....you never know who has what or what has who stuffed up there........

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  48. Having heard ER stories of hamsters in arses, I wonder if there is xray evidence of those little critters?

    What a way to go! Suffocated in poo... poor little buggers. Can't see the thrill in having some rodent clawing its way around my innards, personally speaking.

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  49. MANUEL: you should ask for readers to send in xrays of their own arses.....just to see.....you never know who has what or what has who stuffed up there........

    CAN’T. STOP. LAUGHING.

    Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

    *pauses for a moment*

    That’s a damn good idea.

    *returns to peals of laughter*

    PONITA: Clearly, you are insane.

    Have you considered asking your doctor to increase your dosage?

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  50. I'm not insane, MJ... just slightly warped.

    After having researched the hamster/gerbil in arse situation somewhat, there doesn't seem to be any real evidence of it, so it must be one of those urban myths.

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  51. Personally I think that Gerbiling gets a bum wrap in the media.

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  52. PONITA: Nonetheless, you should be bound in a straitjacket and given to Fammy to deal with.

    DONN: Right. That's enough. This is getting silly.

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  53. cyberpete...which is why you are my friend and not the latest newspaper article :)

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  54. Good to know it's not just men who shove stuff up themselves.

    Women can be pervs too! But this is Infomaniac, so I guess we knew that.

    One day I expect to hear someone explain how, while climbing up a drainpipe to rescue a pigeon, they accidentally fell backwards through their neighbour's bedroom window, unaware that said neighbour was slumbering in bed with a morning erection.

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  55. why, sugar, just why????? xoxox

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