Monday, January 19, 2009

Faggots Galore

Warehouse sale! Prices slashed! Everything must go!

Infomaniac has stockpiled an oversupply of faggots. We have a wide variety of overstock, discontinued, slight irregulars and showroom samples priced to move.

State your style and size preferences.


  1. I read a recent post that they are the best stylists. Do you have any qualified? Preferrably with good teeth, but not too good looking - I don't want to tease myself after all.

    BTW, the ice in your drink is getting melty.

  2. Unfortunately, I've recently made a huge purchase and cannot afford any of the merchandise offered. Also, I'm a non smoker.

  3. HOODCHICK: Since you’re a new Bitch, you may not be aware of Infomaniac protocol.

    Allow us to explain.

    If you are the first to comment, you must yell “Yay! I’m first!” or a variation of that.

    Everyone will be jealous of you.

    Eros, underneath you, is a contender for first place yet you’ve usurped him…this time.

    EROS: You can take your faggots home and try them out for up to 14 days.

    If you don’t love them, we’ll take them back and refund your purchase.

  4. A dozen, please, spicy, for the clear Leberknödelsuppe tomorrow.

    If you are referring to the fascines I am sorry, no wood for me.

    Yay, forth!

  5. Fifth! Not to be confused with Filth... that's your specialty, MJ.

    I will take one, please. I need someone to shovel snow, clean litter boxes, wipe dog spit off the walls and vacuum up kitty fluff.

    As you can see, my absence was mercifully short.

  6. MAGO: Wait until I get my hands on your Koenigsberger Klops.

    PONITA: It sounds more like you need my Houseboys to move in with you.

  7. HA!
    There should always be two, at least!

    I LIKE the Canadian comment there ...

  8. MAGO: Mistress MJ hasn’t experienced the taste sensation of faggots and mushy peas.

    You need to get some poutine in you; the holy trinity of fries, gravy and cheese curds.

  9. Do you have a Betamax copy of Cruising?

    "Al Pacino stars in this fascinating if ridiculous glimpse into Hollywood's version of the sexual excesses of the pre-AIDS gay S&M subculture which portrayed homosexuals as sexual predators morally akin to vampires"

    I guess the Studio couldn't get Eastwood to do a Dirty Hairy version?

  10. DONN: Funny you should mention Betamax as brief mention will be made of it in Tuesday's post.

    Once again, you're not only on top of're ahead of yourself!

  11. I'll take the everyman (regular size, style, looks) model who likes to make out with girls.

    And some poutine to go, thanks.

  12. one who likes to curl up with dogs and pet them all fucking day because they seem to think that should be MY job...oh worry i love them but they are making me a little claustrophobic with this cold weather

  13. Faggots faggots everywhere and not a drop to drink.

    I think I'll pass, I hate sales.

  14. I'll have eggs and bacon please. And a cup of tea would be nice.

  15. Jon Fondle? What an appropriate name.

  16. Surely there are too many arms and legs in that picture.
    I'd like one with style - but you know that size is not important.

  17. I'm certain they can be trained to be houseboys, can't they?

  18. 19th? dammit, dammit, dammit! xoxo

    coffee, please.

  19. We here in Wales, love a hot faggot, especially when served up with mushy peas and chips.

  20. HE: And look at you…you’ve morphed into a new man!

    I’ll try to keep up.

    T-BIRD: I'll take the everyman (regular size, style, looks) model who likes to make out with girls.

    Are you dreaming?

    I hope this poutine will be of some comfort to you.

    DAISY: Petting the dogs IS your job.

    And I thought I told you to get a new avatar.

    Do I have to do everything around here?

    CYBERPOOF: I think I'll pass, I hate sales.

    Go ahead and pay full price then.

    We’re not all made of money, you know.

  21. SCARLET: Do you really want a Canadian brewing your tea?

    We can’t do it properly, you realize.

    Still, we do it better than the Americans.

    GARFY: Jon Fondle? What an appropriate name.

    I’m fonda the name Fondle, aren’t you?

    KAZ: Surely there are too many arms and legs in that picture.

    They’re having a playful game of Naked Twister.

    I'd like one with style - but you know that size is not important.

    I’ll give you the stylish one I had reserved for CyberPoof since he’s gone and turned up his nose at it.

  22. PONITA: I'm certain they can be trained to be houseboys, can't they?

    Where do you think I got MY houseboys?

    These are the irregulars and discontinued lines.

    SAVANNAH: But it’s an improvement over yesterday’s 34th.

    TICKERS: We here in Wales, love a hot faggot, especially when served up with mushy peas and chips.

    I’ll put you down for a case, then?

  23. Just one with a degree in sociology who will ghost write my dissertation whilst managing the sink full of dishes the laundry and dinner and the intense family, so that I can knit and blog undisturbed. Irregular and discontinued is fine, I'm no perfectionist.

  24. i'm doing what i can...geez...give a girl a break!

  25. nothing is cooperating with me today!

  26. LEAH: Why don’t you just knit the man of your dreams?

    Don’t use that cheap-looking Phentex wool though.

    DAISY: Hop to it, wouldya?

  27. Well you don't get Champagne during shopping at sales.

    That was my whole point. And of course all the common people.

    Excuse me, I need to lie/lay down for a bit it's all getting too much for me

  28. Where did my comment go !
    Did you delete it
    ***glares at MJ***

  29. CYBERPOOF: It’s BYOB at this sale.

    BEAST: I did nothing of the sort.

    Now excuse me but SOME of us have to work.


  31. Ok, so I stand corrected. I don't do BYOB sales.

  32. Do these faggots come with their own sauce? If so, I'll take three.

  33. faggots galore? modern day bond boy? eh

  34. I am sure one of the dicontinued lines would still be quite trainable.

    Not too sure about the irregulars. I don't need any more accidents in my house, thanks very much.

    Send one my way, please. I need someone to pet the dog while I go for a swim.

  35. Theres too many around Beantown as it is.

  36. BEAST: I still don’t know what you’re on about.

    Perhaps you have been into the schnapps.

    CYBERPOOF: You’re too cheap for BYOB.

    DAISY: That’s better but do you think you could lighten the image a little?

    It’s a tad on the dark side.

    IVD: Their sauce dried up when they heard you were coming.

    MANUEL: And they’ll have you shaken and stirred.

    PONITA: They’ll pet your dog but they won’t stroke your pussy.

    RICH: What are you doing here on a day that doesn’t begin with ‘Filthy’ and end with ‘Friday’?

  37. Faggots Galore was a film about a ship load of gheys who turned up on a Scottish island and changed their world.

  38. KNUDSEN: Was it a “cruise”ship?