Stop what you’re doing and pick up a copy of Motel Girls by Orrie Hitt.
As members of the Infomaniac Book Club AND as employees of the Infomaniac Inn, you have a duty to read this.
And make sure that a copy is placed in the nightstand of each motel room!
oooh First! Yay!....
ReplyDeleteIts such a wonderful read.
Why.. it's like reading about a night at Ayem8ty's...
"orrie hitt"
ReplyDeletedid he/she/it find this name
in Moist Nom de Plumes
Is there an illustrated version? The motel needs camer.. security devices.
ReplyDeleteI do like moist plums.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Orrie had a Latte or two while writing.
ReplyDeleteJulie makes my pillow fluffing duties so much easier.
ReplyDelete...has anyone noticed that ayem8ty glows in the dark?
ReplyDelete*is jealous*
We are the Gideon's of porn.
ReplyDeleteThe GetItOns.
PRINCESS: oooh First! Yay!....
ReplyDeleteIts such a wonderful read.
Why.. it's like reading about a night at Ayem8ty's...
AyeM8y the human mattress?
NORMADESMOND: "orrie hitt"
did he/she/it find this name
in Moist Nom de Plumes
From my limited research, it appears to be his real name!
A little more background…
Hitt had a grinding regimen, twelve-hour days in front of an aged Remington Royal perched on the kitchen table, surrounded by iced coffee, noisy children and Winston cigarettes, pausing only for supper or to watch wrestling or Sergeant Bilko on the television. Hitt produced a novel every two weeks, for which he was paid as little as $250.
—Lee Server in Over My Dead Body: The Sensational Age of the American Paperback: 1945-1955
MAGO: Is there an illustrated version? The motel needs camer.. security devices.
We’re working on a TV series.
Which 3 Infomaniac bitches will vie for the role, we haven’t yet decided.
MITZI: I do like moist plums.
Are you nuts about plums?
MAGO: I'm sure Orrie had a Latte or two while writing.
Turns out it was iced coffee.
See my comment to Norma.
XL: Julie makes my pillow fluffing duties so much easier.
If I’ve been working you too hard lately, just say so.
NATIONS: ...has anyone noticed that ayem8ty glows in the dark?
*is jealous*
AyeM8y has a glow stick up his arse.
It helps him navigate the back alleys and truck stops late at night.
KAPI: We are the Gideon's of porn.
The GetItOns.
Amen, sistah.
I'm sensing a reason for sassy shoes, girls!
ReplyDeletewell shut my mouth!
ReplyDelete*hands MJ handy ultraviolet skeet light* now wave it around ayem8ty. see? see what I mean? give that man a raise!
ReplyDelete*cracks open cyalume and draws suggestive pictures on stomach so she can be cool too*
Why does the cover show Catherine Zeta Jones about to hide under the covers while Michael Douglas is wearing a giant nappy in the bathroom?
ReplyDeleteWait. Forget it. I've answered my own question.
MICHAEL GUY: I'm sensing a reason for sassy shoes, girls!
ReplyDeleteWe don’t need a reason for sassy shoes but YEAH!
NORMADESMOND: well shut my mouth!
Well butter my biscuit!
NATIONS: *hands MJ handy ultraviolet skeet light* now wave it around ayem8ty. see? see what I mean? give that man a raise!
*cracks open cyalume and draws suggestive pictures on stomach so she can be cool too*
This makes me want to watch the Tazzy and Piggy Slasher movie all over again.
IVD: Why does the cover show Catherine Zeta Jones about to hide under the covers while Michael Douglas is wearing a giant nappy in the bathroom?
Wait. Forget it. I've answered my own question.
Jones’ father is younger than her husband.
The realization has hit her that she’ll be changing both their nappies before you know it.
sweet mary sunshine, sugar, where do you find these things? or can you just loan them to me? xoxoxoxo
ReplyDeleteLatte is a nice German word describing a longish piece of wood, a picket, something woody ... So when I hear people talking in the damndarkmorning to each other like "Na, wie war dein Latte heute?" or "I really nneeed my Latte in the morning!" a friendly smile may cross my wrinkly face ... And how was your's today, dear Mistress?
ReplyDeleteSAVANNAH: sweet mary sunshine, sugar, where do you find these things? or can you just loan them to me?
ReplyDeleteThere are many rocks yet unturned here at Infomaniac.
MAGO: Latte is a nice German word describing a longish piece of wood, a picket, something woody ... So when I hear people talking in the damndarkmorning to each other like "Na, wie war dein Latte heute?" or "I really nneeed my Latte in the morning!" a friendly smile may cross my wrinkly face ... And how was your's today, dear Mistress?
Mistress MJ had her morning wood, er, latte.
Danke sehr.
Cleo was young and fresh from the farm????
ReplyDeleteI hope she didnt tread in anything !!!
Hotel libriaries are marvelous, aren't they? and you can earn yourself a few quid too by taking the best ones to a second hand book dealer, keep your eyes peeled for first editons, that's where the real money is. About ten years ago I was staying in a hotel in Stiges (which shall remain nameless) and came across Ian fleming's first edition of Moonraker which I sold at home for £200!
ReplyDeleteJulie is an idiot. She made the bed and used them. Fool.
ReplyDeleteThat means the bint had to make the beds twice.
Use the bed, then make it.
Where's the sequel Motel Boys?
ReplyDeleteBEAST: Cleo was young and fresh from the farm????
ReplyDeleteI hope she didnt tread in anything !!!
She could play you under the table at cowpie bingo.
MITZI: Hotel libriaries are marvelous, aren't they? and you can earn yourself a few quid too by taking the best ones to a second hand book dealer, keep your eyes peeled for first editons, that's where the real money is. About ten years ago I was staying in a hotel in Stiges (which shall remain nameless) and came across Ian fleming's first edition of Moonraker which I sold at home for £200!
Mistress MJ had the same luck with a Jim Thompson novel.
I see you have my eye for treasures.
ROSES: Julie is an idiot. She made the bed and used them. Fool.
That means the bint had to make the beds twice.
Use the bed, then make it.
Making beds…pah!
That is what houseboys are for.
CYBERPOOF: Where's the sequel Motel Boys?
Do you want to audition the actors?
I'd like that.
ReplyDeleteWe will need to do thorough inspections.
Chapter XXIII starts out with a real, wizz bang opening line: "In anticipation of Ruby's visit, Don placed two quarters on the nightstand next to the Magic Fingers controls..." now that is classy, no matter how you swing it.
ReplyDeleteWhat kinda sleazy outfits you cats stayin' in ? Everywhere I go, there's a damn Bible in the nightstand.
ReplyDeleteHey, wassah guy gotta do around here to get a "Titty Tuesday" post ?!?!
CYBERPOOF: I'd like that.
ReplyDeleteWe will need to do thorough inspections.
And blood tests.
COOKIE: Chapter XXIII starts out with a real, wizz bang opening line: "In anticipation of Ruby's visit, Don placed two quarters on the nightstand next to the Magic Fingers controls..." now that is classy, no matter how you swing it.
It really sets the mood, doesn’t it?
And I hope he tipped her.
HEFF: What kinda sleazy outfits you cats stayin' in ? Everywhere I go, there's a damn Bible in the nightstand.
Hey, wassah guy gotta do around here to get a "Titty Tuesday" post ?!?!
You can start by giving the motel floors a good scrub.
You do those. I cut my finger last week and it was pretty messy. I nearly fainted but resisted because there was nobody to save me.
ReplyDelete(knock knock knock)
ReplyDelete"Who's there?"
"House-keeping."
(door is thrown open)
"I need to make your bed... and get in it. Care to join me?"
"sure baby. Lemme give you a tip..." He does- and then some!
CYBERPOOF: You do those. I cut my finger last week and it was pretty messy. I nearly fainted but resisted because there was nobody to save me.
ReplyDeleteI’m not playing doctor.
MISS JANEY: (knock knock knock)
"Who's there?"
"House-keeping."
(door is thrown open)
"I need to make your bed... and get in it. Care to join me?"
"sure baby. Lemme give you a tip..." He does- and then some!
Join our Motel Girls team, Miss J.
You’re a natural.
You know I wrote this. Right?
ReplyDelete