Monday, November 22, 2010

Infomaniac Inn - Now Hiring

If you read yesterday’s post, you know Mistress MJ plans to buy a hotel/motel to accommodate you on overnight visits.

She couldn’t make up her mind between the “Bad Hotel” or the “Pink Hotel” but fortunately, Hayward came up with a solution…

“Buy both of them. Of course you'll need a bevy of new employees to keep things clean.”

[via]

That’s where you bitches come in.

The Infomaniac Inn is now hiring.

Submit your résumé today.

40 comments:

  1. mago - youre supposed to SAY something OTHER than 1st.....

    I continue my desire to be number one slave boy AND house boy who attends to Mistress' PERSONAL areas PERSONALLY......

    ReplyDelete
  2. MAGO: YAY FIRST!

    Despite what Damien says, your comment shows an eagerness to work.

    DAMIEN: mago - youre supposed to SAY something OTHER than 1st.....
    I continue my desire to be number one slave boy AND house boy who attends to Mistress' PERSONAL areas PERSONALLY......


    You forgot to place a single chaste kiss on each of Mistress' feet as is proper.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Time to get out the french maids outfit and fishnets again...
    Now where did I leave those feathers?...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Will the uniforms be circa Greece Olivia Newton John in the black spandex!? If so, I am totally in! (Though the photo suggests it will be very much the same outfit, indeed!)

    Where shall I slide my résumé~? Into the slot marked "Important"?

    ReplyDelete
  5. PRINCESS: Time to get out the french maids outfit and fishnets again...
    Now where did I leave those feathers?...
    Oh... Here they are


    That link requires signing up so everybody try this link instead to see the dancing boys.

    MANDA: Will the uniforms be circa Greece Olivia Newton John in the black spandex!? If so, I am totally in! (Though the photo suggests it will be very much the same outfit, indeed!)
    Where shall I slide my résumé~? Into the slot marked "Important"?


    Into the slot marked “urgent”.

    As for the uniforms, I found this gold spandex over at Kevin’s (The Lisp) place.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Good morning MJ,

    All take accountant. You just give me all the money, I'll take care the rest.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Just to let you know that I am still monitoring your inane filth.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Mean Dirty Pirate
    _______________

    Hotel Hooker / Motel Madame:

    I propose running a prostitution ring out of both properties. Newly acquired House Boys must prove themselves and work their way up the ladder of success starting off as Infomaniac, “Good Time Girl Bellhops.”

    It fills three positions all at once and under my tutelage, minus my cut, they’ll produce profit necessary to insure the continuing operation of Infomaniac Enterprises.

    Also would it be possible to relocate the Brothels to the foot hills of Infomaniac Mansion? Like in the movie Psycho. It’ll provide those certain guests with special appetites the opportunity to exercise their killer instinct and stalking skills.

    ReplyDelete
  9. XL: Do I get a company car?

    You may act as chauffeur of the MistressMobile.

    KARL: Good morning MJ,
    All take accountant. You just give me all the money, I'll take care the rest.


    Since we maxed out our credit card on the luxury toilet for Infomaniac headquarters, we have nothing left in the counting house for you to count.

    VICUS: Just to let you know that I am still monitoring your inane filth.

    I have yet to provide you with “some nice articles about keeping your house clean, or some recipes, or some moderate political comment”.

    AYEM8Y: Mean Dirty Pirate
    _______________
    Hotel Hooker / Motel Madame:
    I propose running a prostitution ring out of both properties. Newly acquired House Boys must prove themselves and work their way up the ladder of success starting off as Infomaniac, “Good Time Girl Bellhops.”
    It fills three positions all at once and under my tutelage, minus my cut, they’ll produce profit necessary to insure the continuing operation of Infomaniac Enterprises.
    Also would it be possible to relocate the Brothels to the foot hills of Infomaniac Mansion? Like in the movie Psycho. It’ll provide those certain guests with special appetites the opportunity to exercise their killer instinct and stalking skills.


    I’m hiring you on the spot and implementing all your suggestions.

    I’m assuming you’ve already left calling cards in your usual truck stops?

    Or are we looking for a different class of clientele?

    ReplyDelete
  10. What do you mean by, “CLASS”?

    A John’s a John.

    Just need cash up front and if it’s not too much trouble have a Truck Stop parking lot installed.

    The House Boys can provide in-Truck Cab Services. I’ll outfit them with roller skates and chaps uniforms for faster easier access.

    ReplyDelete
  11. AYEM8Y: What do you mean by, “CLASS”?
    A John’s a John.
    Just need cash up front and if it’s not too much trouble have a Truck Stop parking lot installed.
    The House Boys can provide in-Truck Cab Services. I’ll outfit them with roller skates and chaps uniforms for faster easier access.


    I found the perfect roller skates!

    ReplyDelete
  12. NICE!

    Chic and functional,

    I particularly like the high heel swivel caster on a gold patent leather pump.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I'll be receptionist. It's what I do best. Meet and greet, make sure our 'guests' will be comfortable during their stay. If not, that they get charged extra.

    At least it means my mornings can start later...like the afternoons.

    ReplyDelete
  14. well, i can turn down a bed, the volume and a proposition. oh, i guess #3 wouldn't be happening...at your inn.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Norma should be Head House Boy Hooker Bell Hop #1.

    ReplyDelete
  16. My CV?

    I'm very good at polishing wood. All kinds - hardwoods, dark woods, light woods, Ralph Woods and Tiger Woods.

    I'd be honoured to be on the cleaning staff at the MJ Towers.

    What? No I don't want a job, I just want to be...on the staff.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Will your establishment have those vibrating beds? The ones that only cost a quarter?

    ReplyDelete
  18. AYEM8Y: NICE!
    Chic and functional,
    I particularly like the high heel swivel caster on a gold patent leather pump.


    *cranks up Boogie Wonderland and twirls off*

    ROSES: I'll be receptionist. It's what I do best. Meet and greet, make sure our 'guests' will be comfortable during their stay. If not, that they get charged extra.
    At least it means my mornings can start later...like the afternoons.


    Could you start by arranging for XL to fluff the pillows?

    NORMADESMOND: well, i can turn down a bed, the volume and a proposition. oh, i guess #3 wouldn't be happening...at your inn.

    See comment below you from AyeM8y.

    AYEM8Y: Norma should be Head House Boy Hooker Bell Hop #1.

    That’s a mouthful.

    *leaves that one open for interpretation*

    KAPI: My CV?
    I'm very good at polishing wood. All kinds - hardwoods, dark woods, light woods, Ralph Woods and Tiger Woods.
    I'd be honoured to be on the cleaning staff at the MJ Towers.
    What? No I don't want a job, I just want to be...on the staff.


    Ed Wood?

    KELLY RED: Will your establishment have those vibrating beds? The ones that only cost a quarter?

    The Magic Fingers Vibrating Bed?

    No cheap motel would be complete without one!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Of course, I don't do any type of manual labor, but I'm no stranger to the motel lifestyle.

    There are, no doubt, a few folks who were unaware that there is a "motel lifestyle" - well, there is, I'm in it, that's all you need to know.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I'll do the accounts. Which package do you use?

    ReplyDelete
  21. I'll be at the bar. You need someone to entertain your guests at the bar.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Don't you mean 'whose package' Geoff?

    I can't decide whether I'd like to be the Pool Boy or the Mint-on-Pillows Placer.
    As you know, I'm an excellent swimmer what with all that practice down at the docks, plus I'm an expert at the Kiss-of-Life. Well, the kiss, anyway...
    As for the M-o-P Placer, it would be a bit of a come-down for a witch proficient in making entire houses out of sweets and cookies etc, but for you MJ, I'd do it.

    ReplyDelete
  23. The Pink one. It has its own Fairy.

    ReplyDelete
  24. ROXY: Of course, I don't do any type of manual labor, but I'm no stranger to the motel lifestyle.
    There are, no doubt, a few folks who were unaware that there is a "motel lifestyle" - well, there is, I'm in it, that's all you need to know.


    Cable and a kitchenette.

    What more could a girl ask for?

    GEOFF: I'll do the accounts. Which package do you use?

    See comment from IVD.

    Did you ever see that episode of Black Books where Bernard avoids doing his accounts?

    That’s the package I use.

    CYBERPOOF: I'll be at the bar. You need someone to entertain your guests at the bar.

    Can you stand up that long in your Louboutins?

    IVD: Don't you mean 'whose package' Geoff?
    I can't decide whether I'd like to be the Pool Boy or the Mint-on-Pillows Placer.
    As you know, I'm an excellent swimmer what with all that practice down at the docks, plus I'm an expert at the Kiss-of-Life. Well, the kiss, anyway...
    As for the M-o-P Placer, it would be a bit of a come-down for a witch proficient in making entire houses out of sweets and cookies etc, but for you MJ, I'd do it.


    Why don’t you just lounge about in your leopard print
    bikini, looking comely, (and affordable) as usual?

    MISS JANEY: The Pink one. It has its own Fairy.

    Yay! Someone finally mentioned the fairy!

    A free fairy with every room booking!

    ReplyDelete
  25. thanks aye, but i think i need to follow kap around for a while, get the lay of the land.

    ReplyDelete
  26. NORMA: thanks aye, but i think i need to follow kap around for a while, get the lay of the land.

    Start polishing.

    ReplyDelete
  27. i am an experienced valet...
    actually famous for hanging around diverse hotel lounges' men's rooms, offering cigarettes, breath mints, and towels, (amongst other things) for a couple of quarters or a stiff drink....

    ReplyDelete
  28. I'll act as concierge, pointing the way to the best local truck stop restrooms, for a small fee of course.

    ReplyDelete
  29. If there aren't bar chairs, I'll just have to sit daintily on the bar

    ReplyDelete
  30. WALLY: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    Your visit here today entitles you to one free shampoo and blow at The Hair Hall of Fame.

    i am an experienced valet...
    actually famous for hanging around diverse hotel lounges' men's rooms, offering cigarettes, breath mints, and towels, (amongst other things) for a couple of quarters or a stiff drink....


    A stiff one…coming right up.

    JASON: I'll act as concierge, pointing the way to the best local truck stop restrooms, for a small fee of course.

    Truck stops?

    Are you working in tandem with AyeM8y?

    CYBERPOOF: If there aren't bar chairs, I'll just have to sit daintily on the bar

    We’ll assume you’re a bar fly, in that case.

    ReplyDelete
  31. You'll need a maintenance man for working on the pipes. I have a tool belt and jump suit laying around here somewhere.

    ReplyDelete
  32. HAYWARD: You'll need a maintenance man for working on the pipes. I have a tool belt and jump suit laying around here somewhere.

    We’ve always suspected you’re good with hand tools.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I would like to be Noele Gordon aka Meg Mortimar from Crossroads behind the reception desk, looking snooty, but I see Roses has secured that position.

    Tip for future guests staying at MJ's Motel.

    Don't steal the towels, dressing gowns and bedding from the hotel room. Take advantage of Princess's trolley in the corridor, preferably when the hoover is on, that way your crime will go undetected. Plates and cutlery can be hoisted from trays left outside other rooms, wash them in the bath.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Bar fly it is then.

    If you need a little Coyote Ugly action, I may be persuaded if the money's good

    ReplyDelete
  35. MITZI: I would like to be Noele Gordon aka Meg Mortimar from Crossroads behind the reception desk, looking snooty, but I see Roses has secured that position.
    Tip for future guests staying at MJ's Motel.
    Don't steal the towels, dressing gowns and bedding from the hotel room. Take advantage of Princess's trolley in the corridor, preferably when the hoover is on, that way your crime will go undetected. Plates and cutlery can be hoisted from trays left outside other rooms, wash them in the bath.


    Princess is so busy picking up used condoms out of the shag carpeting that she’ll never notice.

    CYBERPOOF: Bar fly it is then.
    If you need a little Coyote Ugly action, I may be persuaded if the money's good


    I’m not sure the world is ready to see you in a wet t-shirt.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I'm here to apply for the job of flicking the "NO" on the Vacancy sign on and off.

    ReplyDelete
  37. COOKIE: I'm here to apply for the job of flicking the "NO" on the Vacancy sign on and off.

    Your sign says no but your eyes say yes.

    ReplyDelete