Thursday, January 31, 2008

Caged Heat

Have I ever told you about my fantasy involving sex through prison bars or fences?

Right then. I won’t bother.


  1. Um, no comment.

  2. That's some impressive tackle you've got there, MJ. Careful you don't get tetanus from that rusty old chainlink fence.

  3. Now you know how Tatas and I manage.

  4. SMUNTY: Well it’s hard to top yesterday’s “mmmmmmmmammaries!” comment, isn’t it, Mong Chops?

    IVD: That’s why I always carry WD-40.

    CONNIE: I’m not sure that you do manage.

    Are the security cameras recording your fumbles?

  5. And some Swarfega to clear up the residue, I hope?

  6. Holy Captive Audience Batman!

    In a women's prison, yes. If you can't get laid there you might as well pack it in.

  7. HE brings up a good point, MJ. Do the fantasies involve female guards and a sadistic female warden?

    Or a nude pyramid of potato sacks on their heads POWs and some National Guardsmen with too much time (and too little brains) on hand?

  8. *waits for the video*

  9. Quick, guard! That man's escaping!!

  10. IVD: I had to Google Swarfega which is described as a dark green, gelatinous, thixotropic substance.

    Sounds like one of your toxic secretions.

    HE: Keep me safe from the predatory lezzers of Frauengefängnis.

    BINGOWINGS: There is room for only one sadistic female warden in my world.

    I am Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS.

    GEO: The video starring your wife, Maidy.

    FN: I would bitch slap you for that comment but instead I’ll send everyone round to your blog to witness the untruths in MJ Exposed.

  11. I did think about linking Swarfega but I had something better to do. I'm glad you found it, though. I make a fortune from it!!

  12. I am not saying anything.....I just get told off
    ***sits in corner being angelic***

  13. IVD: Something better to do?

    Like that ridiculously long email you sent to me?

    Yes, I can see you’re MUCH to busy for anything else.

    BEAST: I’ve been so mean to you lately, Angel.

    Forgive me?

    Come to Mama.

    *waits with giant kipper*

  14. Swarfega was the name of the SS guard at the POW camp I was at and boy was it camp. The degrading things they would make you do for a taste of Wienerschnitzel.

  15. KNUDSEN: I know about your secret Polish sausage supplier.

    Oh the deals that went doon in there.

  16. I am much too pretty and well endowed for prison life.

  17. Yes Brad, I think you are. You'd better come with me...

    ::shouts over shoulder to MJ:: I had to forward that email onto some unfortunate sod, it just happened to be you!
    And I am busy - I'm writing tomorrow's post.

  18. HAH! IDV I bet tomorrows post will become Mondays post

    There are many a movies of an adult nature that goes in a place like that - maybe you can bring that rhinestone neck massager that Bingowings mentioned on my blog

  19. BRAD: Don't listen to IVD.

    Unless you've had your shots.

    IVD: Can we look forward to more car talk?

    "Who's a good Car, then? Who is? Yes, you! I love you, Car!"


    CYBERTWINKIE: I had a crick in my neck!

  20. Did you know that if you put your cocks either side of a chain link fence as if you're in prayer and then slide them up and down. (hic) it's very erotic. (hic).

    Got the right post this time.

  21. CYBERSLUT: A cock in my neck?

    Kinky Dane.

    TICKERS: It smells like a brewery in here all of a sudden.

  22. It's not going well, CyberPoo. I've had too much wine - I can't remember things clearly.

    MJ: Eeeeek! No. No, Car talk. I fell over again...

    Tickers: How many cocks do you have? An why would rubbing fowl over a chain link fence be erotic?

    Shit. This isn't my blog. I'm off!

  23. IVD: I, too, am puzzled by Tickers' many cocks.

    I await an explanation.

    This could be a text book case.

    This may not be your blog but you seem to have settled in today. Why not just take over why I go have a soothing bubble bath?

  24. ***wonders if Mamma MJ will let Beasty nibble the kipper***

  25. I remember now, I've only got the one penii or is it penisseeess. it's your hands you slide up an down as if in prayer. Having had a drink, I thought it would be even better if you had multiple willies and did it.

    You know how it is......

  26. BEAST: I’ll let you fondle my fish flaps.

    TICKERS: Ahhh, the Adoration of the Penii.

    Two heads are better than one.

  27. Well kinky is the term best describing Danes

  28. This comment has been removed by the author.

  29. T-BIRD: I love that you love my blog.

    Don't let IVD know. He'll be jealous and narrow his eyes at me again.

    You're my token Aussie, did you know that?

  30. I wouldn't trust you with a 10-foot pole. To let me have it back, I mean.

  31. WW: Does the WW stand for "Wise Won?"

  32. Looks like that testiclke is getting squished. Ouch.