Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Open Wide

I have a dental appointment today.





The kind-hearted amongst you will applaud me for maintaining good oral hygiene practices.

The vicious amongst you will relate your tales of...

DENTAL HORROR!

Either way, I’m prepared.



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25 comments:

  1. Geoff3:26 AM, December 19, 2007

    I'm going AGAIN today. This will be my third dentist this year.

    Third time lucky!

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  2. Upset Waitress5:13 AM, December 19, 2007

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. Upset Waitress5:15 AM, December 19, 2007

    You can back up a semi and park it into that gap of yours.

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  4. Anonymous6:46 AM, December 19, 2007

    MJ , Happy holidays .

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  5. KAZ6:48 AM, December 19, 2007

    Nitrous oxide is the chemical name for laughing gas.
    Ha ha ha ha ha - not really very funny though is it?

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  6. Rimshot10:21 AM, December 19, 2007

    How odd, I went to the dentist just yesterday to have a crown installed (you may bow and call me His Royal Highness).

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  7. The Mistress11:16 AM, December 19, 2007

    GEOFF: Your dentist is financing a Spanish villa thanks to you.

    WAITRESS: “Mind the Gap” as they say on The Tube.

    GEO: And happy holidays to you and the family!

    Thanks for dropping by.

    KAZ: N2O is also available in handy whipped cream canister size.

    Not that I would know anything more about that.

    RIMMER: Curtsy to me when you approach this blog.

    *bops Rimmer on the noggin’ with my sceptre*

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  8. Romeo Morningwood11:52 AM, December 19, 2007

    Try to make me get a filling
    and I said No No NO!

    I have never questioned your oral fixation...in fact I encourage it.

    It is rude to subject your Dentist to gas during your visit however it is still the best way to keep the bastard from fiddling with your swimsuit area when you are under.

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  9. AngelConradie11:57 AM, December 19, 2007

    hhmmmm... wonder if my dentist will let me dose myself with whatever it is he gives me?

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  10. The Mistress12:15 PM, December 19, 2007

    HE: One of my fave singers, Dinah Washington, has this to say about her dentist, from a song called Long John Blues…

    He took out his trusted drill
    And he told me to open wide
    He said he wouldn't hurt me
    But he'd fill my hole inside
    Long John, Long John, you've got that golden touch
    You thrill me when you drill me, and I need you very much

    ANGEL: What exactly IS he giving you?

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  11. tony12:22 PM, December 19, 2007

    (as they are forever fond of saying on the London Underground)
    "Please Mind The Gap"

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  12. The Mistress12:45 PM, December 19, 2007

    TONY: Maybe I should wear this t-shirt to the dentist.

    Uh-oh. Time for my app’t! Catch up with you all later.

    ReplyDelete
  13. CyberPete1:31 PM, December 19, 2007

    That reminds me of the only Seinfeld episode I've ever seen. The one where he goes to the dentist.

    I can't remember much of it, but it was hilarious. If you haven't seen it I recommend you do BEFORE you go

    Just to be prepared

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  14. garfer1:36 PM, December 19, 2007

    My dentist is a mad Harley Davidson riding German called Ulrich.

    He tells me Hungary is the place to go for dental imlants.

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  15. BEAST4:19 PM, December 19, 2007

    i have never had a single filling....
    give the beast a balloon

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  16. The Mistress4:35 PM, December 19, 2007

    CYBERTOOTH: Was that the episode with Kramer high on Novocaine?

    Your comment came too late. I’ve been and gone but now I’m back.

    GARFY: And Poland for hip replacements.

    In the words of Coronation Street’s Blanche Hunt: "I want a foreign bit! Tracy's got her Moroccan kidney. Why can't I have a Polish hip?"

    BEAST: Nothing says party time like a nitrous-oxide filled balloon.

    ffffffffffffftttttttt!

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  17. Inexplicable DeVice5:15 PM, December 19, 2007

    Ah, you still live.

    Damn that dentist - The bribe obviously wasn't big enough.

    * tuts *

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  18. The Mistress5:24 PM, December 19, 2007

    IVD: If it's any consolation, I feel oddly nauseous and must go into a darkened room for awhile.

    So perhaps whatever you bribed him with is taking effect now.

    Good night.

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  19. FirstNations6:33 PM, December 19, 2007

    now see, when i think of you i think of big mamma thorntons 'if I cant sell it, I'll just sit on it, cuz I aint givin it away.'

    didja fly without valium?

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  20. S.I.D.6:45 PM, December 19, 2007

    Going to see a strange man to have him put his tool in your mouth AGAIN??


    Remember to spit,though knowing you, you'll probably swallow and ask for more.

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  21. The Mistress6:47 PM, December 19, 2007

    FN: Or Bessie Smith...


    He give me a lesson that I never had before
    When he got to teachin' me, from my elbow down was sore
    He poured my first cabbage and he made it awful hot
    He poured my first cabbage and he made it awful hot
    When he put in the bacon, it overflowed the pot.

    SID: Speak of the Cabbage Man and he appears.

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  22. S.I.D.7:29 PM, December 19, 2007

    And thus he did.

    Does your pot o'erflow alot then?

    You can get help with that.

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  23. CHIC-HANDSOME10:58 PM, December 19, 2007

    how are you?

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  24. CyberPete1:04 AM, December 20, 2007

    it was the one where the nurse and dentist may have had a little fun too much fun with a drugged up Seinfeld

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  25. eroswings12:35 PM, December 20, 2007

    I hope you're well satisfied after paying a professional to take care of your cavities.

    I hope he was careful, lest you end up in a compromising position.

    ReplyDelete

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