Voted “Poofiest Baby” by you. And for good reason.
..to the filthy, Twinkie-loving, circus-flea-encrusted, closet-poofter that he’s become today?…
[photo via Tazzy & Piggy]
ODE TO STEVE
He’s rather cunty
We call him Smunty
He’s taken a liking
To being a Viking
His cock is bent
It pays the rent
Happy Birthday, Smunty the Cabin Boy!
I think all us guys want to be Vikings.
ReplyDeleteI have no idea if Vikings had bent cocks. I don't think they cared much for paying rent though. Sorta not really a "Viking thing" - you know?
Meanwhile, I've spent over half my life trying to figure out why there is an American football team in Minnesota (where I lived for 4 years) is named after Norwegian sea raiders. Has never made much sense because seemed to me most Minnesotans that had to - paid rent. As to the bent cocks part - never checked it out.
* shudders *
ReplyDeleteThat gumby expression on Smunty's face disturbs me.
Still, Happy Birthday Cabin Boy!
Thanks for remembering me, you sentimental old tramp.
ReplyDeleteWill be home soon, will thank you properly then.
X
Happy birthday Smunty.
ReplyDeleteYeah,Happy Birthday CuntGrumpSmunt!
ReplyDeleteNWT: Here’s more information about Viking penises. No mention of bendy bits though.
ReplyDeleteIVD: Good. I’ll be sure to post it again in future.
SMUNTY: That you are forever beholden to me is thanks enough.
CONNIE: I know your big day is in March but what about that slapper you’re married to?
SID: Aren’t you going to offer him a drink?
It seems you’ve stocked up enough for the holidays to share with all of us.
Hmm - obviously a forgery.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday young Smunty!
You made it another year. Well done you.
ReplyDeleteThe great big lovely gift without a card is from me.
Happy birthday smutty
ReplyDeleteHope you are having a fabulous day you viking you
What age is Smunty Miserablés anyway?
ReplyDelete48?
KAZ: Forgery? It’s his face that’s the crime.
ReplyDeleteRIMMER: Have you sent him a “his” mug?
CYBERHO: Don’t encourage him by calling him Viking.
SID: Unlike you, Smunty hasn’t had to roll back his odometer.
No mugs other than those already received, as P&T were the ONLY ones who sent me their address.
ReplyDeleteAnd unlike SOME people, when I say I'm sending something, I send it...be it a mug or a hopping plastic lederhosen.
RIMMER: Don't get your Bavarian folk pants in a twist.
ReplyDeleteYou'll get your windup hopping lederhosen.
No, that's ok. Perhaps you can donate it to some worthy cause or needy person instead.
ReplyDeleteI've lost interest in your ballyhooed knee-breeches à la bavaroise.
Suffice it to say that I had a blue Christmas without them. At this point, it would just be insulting and patronizing.
RIMMER: Argh! I'd just put them in a padded envelope for you!
ReplyDeleteIf you still want them, let me know as I can't send them today (have to leave for work) but was going to pop them in the post tomorrow.
RIMMER: p.s. None of the others have their prizes yet either if it's any consolation. I'm a lazy cunt. But I do have a note here in front of me to hop to it and get them sent out.
ReplyDelete*crocodile tears*(dramatic sigh, back of hand to my forehead)
ReplyDeleteI suppose, if you've gone to the trouble of a padded envelope and all...*sniffle*
(bows...thank you...thank you!)
Ah, bless him, the adult Smunty has a face only a mom could love!
ReplyDeletethat's an awfully big arm up that little mans ass.
ReplyDeleteRIMMER: I'll need a padded cell by the time I'm through with you.
ReplyDeleteEMMA: And his ma's not so sure.
WAITRESS: Believe me, he can take it.
And then some.
Happy B Lat'd B Day, Steve!
ReplyDeleteI shall pillage and plunder some today in honor of your Viking traditions!