Saturday, October 06, 2007

A Crabby Bitch

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23 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:15 AM, October 06, 2007

    So is that horrendous, freakishly long, but slightly amusing neck.

    As are the orange peel thighs.

    As are the Beryl The Peril stripey stickings.

    As is the funny accent.

    Yay! First!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous5:16 AM, October 06, 2007

    'Stickings' is a local Yorkshire colloquialism for 'Stockings'.

    But you knew that, didn't you?

    ReplyDelete
  3. S.I.D.5:56 AM, October 06, 2007

    Can I rip your arms off??

    OK then just the one.

    You'll need that for self pleasuring.

    ReplyDelete
  4. CyberPete6:07 AM, October 06, 2007

    You've really been watching America's next top model haven't you?

    You know all about the importance of the neck now.

    How much hairspray did you have to use? it looks like a helmet

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous6:16 AM, October 06, 2007

    It looks like she's used more Botox than hairspray.

    ReplyDelete
  6. CyberPete7:14 AM, October 06, 2007

    True

    What really amazes me is the comment about charm

    MJ has charm?

    Like a car crash maybe

    ReplyDelete
  7. Maidy7:39 AM, October 06, 2007

    I thought I was the charming bitch of this posse.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous8:21 AM, October 06, 2007

    No Maidy. We're the charming bitches!

    We could charm the knickers off Mother Teresa.

    *shudders at thought*

    ReplyDelete
  9. The Mistress9:13 AM, October 06, 2007

    DIRTY FILTHY BITCHES. ALL OF YOU.

    PIGGY: Oh shit. I didn’t notice the model’s neck. Fuck.

    Stickings? *consults Yorkshire-English dictionary*

    SID: The only thing being ripped off is the posting title.

    Did you notice my play on your “A Crabby Life” post title?

    Did you? Eh?

    CYBERSLUT & PIGGY: I have enough hairspray left to spray your big gobs shut, that’s how much.

    MAIDY: I was saving this pic for you but since you so seldom visit any of us anymore I couldn’t’ be bothered.

    PIGGY: Mother T. went commando, didn’t she?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous9:56 AM, October 06, 2007

    No. Its just that her knickers fell to her ankles, petrified.

    It apparently required the services of 3 master sculptors to chisel the off.

    Hence that stupid shuffly walk she sported.

    ReplyDelete
  11. The Mistress10:35 AM, October 06, 2007

    PIGGY: I thought she had a stupid shuffly walk because she had a Diving Nun stuck up her sari.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Rimshot12:20 PM, October 06, 2007

    I think this is MJ's way of sharing her 'secret' that she has crab lice.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous1:01 PM, October 06, 2007

    No, MJ. The Diving Nun was a myth to cover up the fact that she had a prolapse that push it's way through her wire brush covered cunt.

    Rimshot - Believe us, it was no secret.

    We did send her a bottle of Derbac lotion once, but she admitted to us that she couldn't bear to kill them.

    Feeds them every day, so she does.

    And they all have names. The adults and the squillions of babies.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Inexplicable DeVice5:04 PM, October 06, 2007

    Ah, I see all possible avenues of nastiness have been covered, so I'll just toddle off...

    * crunch *

    Christ, MJ! That one was the size of a vacuum cleaner. I didn't so much step on it, as fall over it!
    I can see why you let it out to play, though. If a crab that size was hanging off one's muff 24/7, it'd play havoc with one's back.

    ReplyDelete
  15. S.I.D.6:15 PM, October 06, 2007

    And neck!

    I wonder has she trained her crabs,like Smunty and his performing fleas?

    ReplyDelete
  16. The Mistress10:03 PM, October 06, 2007

    RIMSHOT, PIGGY, IVD & SID: I simply can't have crabs as there's no landing strip for them to cling to.

    ReplyDelete
  17. peri12:13 AM, October 07, 2007

    Never mind all this long necks and crabs nonsense. For the love of Ike! Can't you just post some more pics of sexy seniors displaying their bollocks and dongs? Need less fluff and more eye candy.

    ReplyDelete
  18. eroswings12:28 AM, October 07, 2007

    FYI, shaving will not get rid of the crabs; using a lotion such as Derbac will get rid of the crabs. Don't forget to launder the sheets and clothes and towels and to notify all your partners to treat themselves to prevent reinfestation.

    ReplyDelete
  19. The Mistress1:13 AM, October 07, 2007

    PERI: Sexy seniors? I'll post a pic of Piggy.

    BINGOWINGS: You seem to be an authority on crabs.

    Have they cleared up yet?

    ReplyDelete
  20. eroswings8:24 AM, October 07, 2007

    MJ, I shall need to come in person with a large magnifying glass to see if you're all clear. I'll be very careful that the sun doesn't accidentally sear your skin through the lens.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Anonymous4:00 PM, October 07, 2007

    YAY 21st!!
    Isn't it about time you changed them fucking tights you dirty bitch.

    Crabby BITCH. Sponge Bob will be happy that you've pick that name.
    Sponge Bob loves crabby patties!

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Mistress4:34 PM, October 07, 2007

    BINGOWINGS: No, I was asking if YOURS had cleared up!

    TATAS: And you love crabby panties.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Anonymous8:26 AM, October 08, 2007

    You sick bitch!

    ReplyDelete

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