Tuesday, February 09, 2010

How Dodgy Are You?

Have you ever strolled around your house naked? Or been drunk in a pub?

Then you may be living dangerously.

Take this test and find out how dodgy you are.

Note to our American readers: “Dodgy” is the British slang equivalent of shady/shifty/of questionable character/not to be trusted.

Note: This is a FEBRUARY FLASHBACK from the Infomaniac Archives. Content in Feburary Flashbacks may be slightly altered from the original posting. We welcome your comments but due to time limitations this month, Mistress MJ will not be responding personally to all your comments.


  1. SCORE! I came in at:
    Years in prison: 69 Potential fine: £7500

    If I hadn't lied or had a better memory, I'd probably have done even better

  2. Crooked

    Ello, ello, ello… what 'ave we 'ere then…? You're living close to the edge and it's only a matter of time before you're collared by the Old Bill. You may have fallen on your feet so far, but it won't last forever. Have you ever thought about a more rewarding pastime? (Emotionally that is…)

    Based on your answers, we have calculated the maximum penalty for your crimes*:

    Years in prison: 26.5 Potential fine: £2000

    I recall a mentor telling me in my young and dumb and full of fun days: It's only illegal if you get caught!

  3. That's the very same quiz I had to take for the Official Pillow Fluffer position!

  4. Apparently, I'm 'Risky'.

    0.5 years in Prison
    £5000 fine.


    I need more vices.

  5. I am cristal clear, pure and immaculate.

  6. Crikey...
    0.5 years and a £2,000 fine.
    I will be careful with postage stamps in future. I promise.

  7. I'm... Dubious...

    Years in prison: 8 Potential fine: £5000

    Always knew I was a bit of a bad girl!

  8. crooked...and that's my story and i'm stickin to it! xoxoxxo

  9. kabuki recieved 45 years and 7500 pounds in fines. Fortunately kabuki subscribes to a higher law, the being the law of cosmic righteousness. If the heavens know kabuki is right, that works for me. Also heaven rarely fines anyone in those silly pounds, because they look like monopoly money.

  10. I am "Tasty" and looking at a 25 year stretch

  11. I'm Dodgy, 47 years at her majesty's pleasure (27 of those in solitary confinement) and a £7000 fine. The prison pony it is then. Pleasure at her Majesty's! I bagsy the steam press.

  12. 80 Years in prison and a £5000 fine...now I'll go back and answer honestly :)
    Just double it now.

  13. Guess I'm Miss goody two-shoes:
    7.5 Potential fine: £7000

    Why do I hang out with you people? You are a BAD influence...hee hee!

  14. I already know I am shifty.

  15. apparently I'm "dubious"
    But remind me to never go to Singapore.

  16. oh I'm dodgy alright.....but the cousin's worse....he'd be naked all the time if he could get away with it.....the filthy fucker...

  17. Just for public record: I'm 'upstanding' and have the tiara to prove it, fuckers!

  18. It's like a den of thieves in here!

    And you're all my prison bitches, Bitches!

  19. Dubious
    Years in prison: 8 Potential fine: £7000

  20. I'm extremely law abiding. Only half a year in jail and £2000 fine. Though if anyone tries to enforce it you'll have to add "cop killer" to the list.

  21. Harr harrr me hearties1:14 PM, February 11, 2010

    Again that just rubbish!

    What about the real questions such as "Have you ever worked for the 'Italians'?" or "Have you ever worked for the boss of the Dutch underworld?" or questions like "Have you ever been arrested and thrown in the back of a police van?" or even "Has a bar-owner ever locked the doors and threatened to tell the police where you are unless you pay him double for all your drinks?"

    Then there are the ever popular "Have you ever belted/shot/thrown someone against a wall and watched him slide down it?" and also "Has anyone you known ever been shot to death/burned alive?" questions!

    Honestly, some people with their questionnaires.

    (Posted for Mob as he is at this moment trying to row across the Atlantic in an old bath-tub. He semaphored an exchange of messages to a merchantman who then passed the message on to me and I am now in port blogging this.)

  22. Harr harrr me hearties3:38 PM, February 11, 2010

    Mob has just been semaphored the message that he is in the North Sea which is the wrong direction if he is headed for Canada. Luckily he has this past week only just made it out of Whitely Bay anyway.