Infomaniac will be holding our First Annual Christmas Office Party on Thursday, December 11th.
RSVP and let us know what you’ll be bringing to the party.
Operators are standing by to take your call.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
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FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
ReplyDeleteOkay, now that you all know I am FIRST! I will officially say that I plan on being there. I assume clothing is optional and cheese whiz is required. Correct?
ReplyDeletei'll bring bombay with me...
ReplyDeleteI UH... like drinking at work...
ReplyDeleteI'll bring the wallflower.
ReplyDeleteMr T Piña Colada Mix
ReplyDeleteCostCo Bulk Rum
Cheetos
Vodka.
ReplyDeleteAnd a straw.
oops, yes put me down in the "I'll be there" column.
ReplyDeleteWhere are my manners?
RANDOM: Clothing optional?
ReplyDeleteYou have to ask?
What exactly are your plans for that Cheese Whiz?
Is someone bringing Wet Wipes?
DAISY: Aren’t they calling it Mumbai now?
I’m not sure we have room for 13,662,885 guests.
Couldn’t you have picked a smaller city?
VOICES: Please note ahead of time that the potted plants are not public toilets.
GINRO: You’ll be doing the Watusi in no time.
XL: Sounds like a night out with Britney Spears.
BOXER: Only one straw?
Didn’t your family teach you to share?
Yes, where ARE your manners?
I'm bringing a bad attitude and a good bottle of Scotch.
ReplyDeleteor a good attitude and a bad case of lovin' you?
ReplyDeleteThe straw is for everyone else.
ReplyDeleteI won't need it.
DONN: Someone's feelin' frisky!
ReplyDeleteBOXER: You've already started drinking, haven't you?
I'll come by.
ReplyDeleteA box of Silvaner, Gerbrunner Hummelberg, 2006 for the masses; I'll go with a small bottle of Thüngersheimer Regent (2007 ?) and switch later to a Müller-Thurgau. It tastes all bad and is nothing for.
I'll bring the eggnog, the champagne punch, and some peppermint hot chocolate (for the recovering alcoholics). I'll also see if I can round up a fruitcake, some kolaches, and some magic brownies.
ReplyDeleteAnd wet wipes...And the Chipmunk's Christmas Album.
Eros, let me bring the fruitcake! It is homemade and has had rum drizzled on it weekly for 6 weeks.
ReplyDeleteIt is sooooo yummy! When unwrapped, the vapours alone will knock you over!
I will bring
ReplyDeleteA few jugs of Cafe C's legendary Screaming Orgasm Cocktail.
Cheap Gin
Peanuts
Ma Beasties Chick Pea curry for the buffet
26 rolls of toilet tissue(see above)
A bodyguard
I wouldn't miss it. I really wouldn't after your last party.
ReplyDeleteWill that slag IDV be attending?
I've got some duct tape and rope I can bring, oh and a tarp.
ReplyDeleteI'll be knockin' around too...
ReplyDeleteI'll remain sober intending to take advantage of the drunk ones in the stationery cupboard tee hee
That slag IDV?
ReplyDeleteWell. Now I know what I'm bringing: Industrial strength make-up remover (the same sort that Dolly Parton uses), a hacksaw to cut someone down to size (or at least cut the heels off their... um.. heels), and a camera to capture the sight of a de-glittered 'Petra!
And for everyone else, I'll promise not to wear orange.
I'll bring a packet of Pork Scratchings, but don't expect any booze you cheapskate.
ReplyDeleteI'll bring Kev and his guitar so we can have a rousing chorus of 'The Wild Rover'.
ReplyDeleteEr -unless you'd rather I came alone.
I will bring a bowl of fruit with plenty of bananas. They seem to go down well over here.
ReplyDeleteSx
That slag IDV?
ReplyDeleteBlimey has Petra come out of the Chav closet at last
A bottle of absinthe, some Panama cigars, a team of huskies and a cement mixer.
ReplyDeleteI'll be photocopying my arse.
ReplyDeleteBetty - Dear: That is promising! After all it's Canada, there should be a nice lake nearby for the cement divers.
ReplyDeleteknuddy is bringing rope! hurrah! we'll be swinging in no time ...
ReplyDeleteI haven't been invited to an office party for quite some time, and may forget my manners with all the excitement. I shall bring cake, for the cake fart game.
I'll bring the stripper.
ReplyDeleteAnd the entertainment.
MAGO: Please attach your hangover remedy to the bottles.
ReplyDeleteEROS: I predict we’ll need an industrial-sized vat of Wet Wipes.
And you’ll need a body guard if you plan to play the Chipmunks album.
PONITA: Keep a firm grip on that fruitcake.
Otherwise it will be used as a weapon in the CyberPoof/IVD catfight that’s sure to happen.
BEAST: It seems to me I remember a party involving Ma Beastie's chickpea curry and Ms. Nation's three- bean salad.
I don’t want to have to hire a hazmat team to clean up the aftermath.
CYBERPOOF: When are you and IVD going to kiss and make up?
ReplyDeleteWhatever happened to “goodwill toward men” in the holiday season?
KNUDSEN: You’ve gone and excited poor Carnalis with your party tricks.
She's all a-titter.
HARDHOUSE: I’ll have the video camera rolling.
IVD: You might want to apply some fresh wig adhesive for the ensuing catfight.
GARFY: Pork scratchings?
Do they contain Irish pork?
Are you trying to poison us?
KAZ: Aren't the pair of you too busy in your role as Spouses Selling Houses to attend our party?
ReplyDeleteSCARLET: If you’re bringing bananas, you’ll have to be in charge of doling them out or Beast will try to wrangle the bunch from you.
BEAST: I believe Chavs are called “Brians” in Denmark.
CyberPoof will correct me if I’m wrong.
BETTY: Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.
Can you try to control your husband?
GEOFF: There’s one like you at every party!
ReplyDeleteMAGO: And this being Canada, a team of huskies should be near at hand as well.
CARNALIS: Did somebody say CAKE?
KAPI: A stripper?
I’ll bring money to stuff down your Y-fronts.
Is it OK if I invite Monica?
ReplyDeleteSounds Like A Good Opportunity To Break-In My Brand New Wellies......
ReplyDeleteMy God mj - I've just seen that Kev and Kaz link? Just think of the damage it could do to my image.
ReplyDeleteI may have to sue
Brian or Johnny (Johnni also works) you take your pick.
ReplyDeleteI'm neither though - also most definately NOT a chav.
I'm still waiting for an apology from IDV for stealing my man. Must admit the memory is a bit fuzzy but there was definately a man involved and IDV stole him.
Maybe I'll bring a spray against pests. I'm sure that'll work...
IDV: Hah! I never wear makeup at Christmas parties. Be warned, if you as much as look at my shoes there'll be hell to pay.
ReplyDeleteIf he's lucky I'll let him cut my red feather boa in half.
ReplyDeleteBetter supply water wings for everyone, cuz if it is typical Wet Coast weather, we will need them to get to your place.
ReplyDeleteThe fruitcake is much too delicious to chuck about, but it is weighty enough to cause a concussion, I am sure! Might have to keep it away from CP and IDV - don't really want anyone to get hurt. But I will bring my first aid kit and nursie uniform just in case.....
MJ, is Famulus coming? Do you have a jacuzzi? Will there be bubbles?
I'm bringing Nutella and a tablespoon.
ReplyDelete*hic*
ReplyDeletewtf happened to my last comment?!?!?!
ReplyDelete*looks around for potted plants*
DONN: Funny… Monica asked me if she could invite you!
ReplyDeleteTONY: But can you dance in wellies?
KAZ: I’m disturbed by the image of you in real estate.
What a sell out.
CYBERPOOF: If he's lucky I'll let him cut my red feather boa in half.
Sounds like foreplay.
PONITA: Famulus hasn’t stopped by here in days.
You’ll have to invite him yourself.
I’ll prepare the Jacuzzi just in case.
LEAH: *stands by with shovel*
BOXER: Lush.
VOICES: What last comment?
Are you high?
((SCHWING))
ReplyDeleteWill there be easy-listening-music? Maybe I can throw in a humbhumba-yodeling-cd.
ReplyDeleteNot at all. His facination of all things orange frightens me.
ReplyDeleteCyberPete
ReplyDeleteWhy should you allow someone be so rude to your featherboa?
DONN: Try to remember that you’ve recently had a “procedure” and may have to proceed with caution.
ReplyDeleteMAGO: Bring along your yodeling tunes but only if you show up to the party in lederhosen.
CYBERPOOF: I’m regretting my decision to let IVD be in charge of the décor.
MAGO: *waits for response from CyberPoofter*
am i high?
ReplyDelete*looks around for potted plants some more, jumping from one foot to the other*
do i look high?
*urgency for a potted plant is now getting more desperate*
so did you hide them or what? and no im not high, i only drink at work....
****sits huddled in Stinky duvet in corner***
ReplyDeleteVOICES: The washrooms will be CLEARLY MARKED.
ReplyDeleteBEAST: Do you have to take that thing with you EVERYWHERE?
Mago: Someone/something has to take one for the team I suppose, and better my boa than me.
ReplyDeleteMJ: Oh great, so everything will be orange. Could you not have foreseen that?
Now I have to rethink my shoes again, I've just been out looking for shoes and none of the choices go with orange I'm afraid.
Um, I'll Liquor.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: It's going to be an orange nightmare, I just KNOW it.
ReplyDeleteHEFF: Liqour?
I'm sure you WILL!
Maybe I should keep my sunglasses on at the party. Just in case.
ReplyDeleteWill you be serving screwdrivers?
too late...
ReplyDelete*apologizes to plant for excess watering*
as I'm working I'll arrive late and try and catch up.....
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Someone's gonna get screwed is all I know.
ReplyDeleteVOICES: Don't make me take you off the guest list.
MANUEL: We'll wait up for ya.
i'll be there with bells on, sugar! xoxoxo (and bringing some planters punch, you'll love it!)
ReplyDeleteI'll be bringing a bad cold, a case of Herpes Simplex, a wish to kiss and two 24's of Coors Light.
ReplyDeleteAnd the green elf shorts, if I can find them. Oh, and I'm trying to remember what you look like again.
Along with the rum soaked fruitcake, I will bring a Vinetarta.
ReplyDeleteIf anyone is interested, I also have reindeer antlers (not real ones, silly! the kind you wear like a headband), a flashing red nose, and my spurs and a whip - for those boys who have been really naughty!
*thinks of making some 'Santa' chaps to go with the spurs...*
And no Christmas party is complete without the Misteltoe!!!!
ReplyDeleteI will bring that too.
*pins misteltoe to reindeer antlers on head...*
Mistress MJ is now hard at work on the guest list.
ReplyDeleteIf you are just reading this post for the first time NOW, what the hell TOOK you so long?
You may or may not be pictured at the party as a result but we'll save a seat for you by the potted plant where Voices pees.
Monica and I will be playing 7 Minutes in Heaven..
ReplyDeletebetter make that hours!
Kindly direct me to your biggest closet.
DONN: Please see posting above to see what happened on the way to the closet.
ReplyDelete