Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Results of the World’s Biggest Underpants Competition

After a piss poor effort on the part of all of you, I have declared the winner of the World’s Biggest Underpants Competition to be me!

I’m going to keep the giant knickers for myself. I’ll sit around and eat packets of crisps and drink endless pints of Guinness ‘til my arse fits into them.


  1. Yay! First!

    I already have The 'Shorts, and I didn't want another disgusting pair of undergarments cluttering up the place.

    Plus, I couldn't think of any reason why I'd want such things...

  2. How could we forget you have the shorts, IVF? We're all sat here waiting to see you pose in the fucking things.

    Jeez - and I thought Smunty and Connie were fucking slow!

  3. *agrees with Piggy*

    *threatens to sit on IVD in my giant knickers*

  4. oh right. nobody buys that for a second. you had them on the whole time and it was just too much trouble to call the emt's to come cut them off your huge gelid ASS.

    oh, you know what i mean.
    *swings tits in a threatening manner*

  5. Who is that in the awesome pic?
    Tony? Mutley? wee Piggy?...

    Any road - if you seriously want to have an arse like that you need PIES!! as any true northern lass knows.

  6. "I’ll sit around and eat packets of crisps and drink endless pints of Guinness ‘til my arse fits into them."

    'til???? They fit now surely?

    And be honest,your keeping them as you can't peel them off.

    And its arses!

  7. FN is swinging tits??

    *gets Canon ready*

    Okay, can you do that again but in like a Bionic Woman slow mo way?

  8. Is that old Knuddie with his head on/in the stool?

  9. Poor bloke

    now had it been a competition to win a pair of strappy stiletto sandals...

  10. PIGGY: I’ll make sure IVD suffers a slow asphyxiation.

    FN: I can only assume that the “HE” you speak of is “Homo Escapeons.” “HE” is, afterall, his blogger initials. How did HE get mixed up in this?

    Or are you referring to our little turf war over Old Knudsen? If so, be here on this blog tomorrow and I’ll take you down.

    And while I’m at it I’ll challenge that American psycho bitch Maidy to a fight too. She should be back in fighting form now that she’s popped the sprog.

    Get ready for me, bitches.

    KAZ: He’s got his mouth full and can’t tell you.

    SID: Arses? Maybe where YOU come from.

    You’re just jealous because the giant knickers are too tight on your fat arse(s).

    MAIDY: See my comment to FN.

    RICH: See my comment to Kaz.

    CYBERPETE: It’s a competition, not a fashion show.

    There’s always a prima donna in the group.

  11. Bring it on, sista!

    *gets Louisville Slugger and paper bag filled with unopened soda cans ready*

  12. MAIDY: Save your energy for Thursday.

    And wear lacy knickers so that it chafes when I give you a wedgie.

  13. I have brought my own pair - so there...**snuffles - oh you taste so good I wish I could be you!!**

  14. I'm not some piece of meat to be used and lusted over................ or am I?

    I have the face that launched a 1000 shits.

  15. MUTLEY: Permission to wash my big smalls on Knudsen's day off.

    KNUDSEN: It's FN who lusts after your meat. She can't resist the stench of urine soaked trousers.

    I, on the other hand, just want you around to do my bidding when my main man slave isn't around. You can start by handwashing my giant knickers.

  16. c'mon, maidy, you taker her high, i'll take her...high. i'll have to get high to take'er.
    you have enough man-slave in s.i.d and steve! the alpha-slut changing knudsons 'Grampers' is gonna be ME! damn ol' a-cup cheeser! *whippin up on the secret kung-fu breasteses kata*

  17. Okay, you've milked this so-called competition for long enough now.

    Post something new, bitch!

  18. My definition of the ideal woman - someone who, when she sits on your face, you can't hear the stereo.

  19. FN: Well you’ve got the SLUT bit right but you're no alpha.

    PIGGY: Ooooo…who’s got his big knickers in a twist?

    Relax, bum boy. There’ll be something new on Thursday.

    PITHER: Welcome!

    You’re one of Betty’s bitches, aren’t you?

    Whither Pither?

    Wait! You’re the cunt who said I look like George Burns!

    I’ll deal with you later. In the meantime, here’s a brew. Pull up a seat under my big arse and join us.

    Can't hear a thing now, can you, Reggie?

  20. oh yeah? well, well, gamma!
    gamma gamma gamma!
    uh huh! how do ya like that, huh?
    khaki is such a revolting color!
    knudson is mine!
    in your face!

    *strangles on aldous huxley breakfast flakes 'they crunch when you set them on fire! free contraceptive bandolier inside'*

    *strains self reaching for that one*