Thursday, August 09, 2007

DUNKING : Naff or Not?

As I’m about to embark on my British biscuit trial, I’ve noticed that some of you mentioned biscuit-dunking in the comments.

Dunking was discouraged in the Infomaniac childhood homestead as it was considered naff. Of course I dunked the minute my mother’s back was turned.

So, how about you? Are you dunkers?

Do you have a preferred method of dunking? A certain level of sogginess you must attain? How do you prevent the biscuit from disintegrating into a sludgy mess at the bottom of your cup? How much of the biccie do you dunk? A little at a time? Or the entire biscuit in one go? And for how long should the biscuit be submerged? Does dunking improve the flavour of certain biscuits? Are certain types of biccies more dunkable than others?

I’ve so much to learn.

And look at this clever bit of design. A dunk mug with a compartment to store your biscuits…


  1. Yay - first again.

    I told MJ about pilot biscuits - a Newfoundland & Labrador tradition. They almost have to be dunked cuz they is so hard and dry, but it's also cool to crunch them.

    Dunking them in dark rum or beer is considered okay too back in the homestead....

  2. You do know which type of biscuits to dunk after a while - trial and error I suppose.

    Good dunkers - rich tea, ginger nuts, digestives, custard creams, abbey crunch.

    Poor dunkers - Hob Knobs, garabaldi, fig rolls.

  3. The only biscuits suitable for dunking in polite company are plain digestives and Rich Tea.

    Some people dunk Cadbury Chocolate fingers, the common oiks.

  4. Peter Kaye gives the definitive guide to dunking. It ranges from Rich Tea (four second dunk and then QUICK!! it's going to sludge off into your brew!!) to Hob Knobs (the unbreakbale, SAS commando of dunkers).
    Who cares if anyone thinks dunking is naff? - they probably think using a slice of bread to wipe up the egg yolk from your brekkie or the gravy from your dinner is naff as well. Sod 'em!

  5. You might like these guys

    Paying particular attention to the Etiquette section.

  6. Considering I have the table manners of a barbarian, I could give two hoots if someone thinks dunking is naff.

    Besides, us Yanks love to dunk! We have commercials about it (i.e., Oreo cookies, Chips Ahoy, etc.) We even have a doughnut chain named Dunkin Donuts. That right there tells ya something.

    I prefer the almost soggy dunk. And Chips Ahoy with milk is my fave cold drink dunk. Hot drink dunk would be coffee and a actual dunkin' donut (it even has a handle on it so enjoy the full dunking experience).

    I think I'll have to try the Rich Tea and Hob Nob experiment myself.

    *makes note to pick them up after work*

  7. My all-time dunking fave: Chips Ahoy chocolate chip cookies, submerged in milk just long enough to make them soft, but not too soft.

    It's all in the timing. :-)

    Close second is graham wafer crackers.

    And because it's impossible to dunk, spice cake, in a bowl, covered in milk.

  8. Pork Scratchings dunked in Tetley Bitter.yummy!

  9. NWTRUNNER: *imagines self in Newfie pub dunking pilot biscuits in dark rum*

    You should get a job with the Newfoundland Tourism Board for putting this idyllic image in my mind.

    BOTTER: You say HobNobs are poor dunkers yet Pither recommends them as dunkable. I’m confused. I’ll experiment with this on the weekend and get back to you.

    GARFY: You are the Cary Grant of this blog.

    You may kiss my hand.

    PITHER: “Who cares if anyone thinks dunking is naff?”

    I do. I’m a lay-dee.

    *straightens skirt and snaps legs together*

    BILLY: How delightful!

    I must remember not to mock the fucking Queen and to doff my lycra catsuit at the door.

    PIGGY: I thought you were too busy eating Smunty’s burnt weenies in Dorset to visit here.

    Obviously you’ve forgotten something dunking-related that I posted last year. Come back tomorrow for a reminder.

    *smiles smugly*

    MAIDY: You vulgarian Americans make the rest of us look so civilized.

    Keep up the good work.

    WW: You should get together with Maidy for a Chips Ahoy dunk fest.

    She loves Canucks, you know.

  10. TONY: Oh Zimmy, you've just put me off my breakfast.

  11. The only thing you dunk is an oreo in a glass of cold milk

    when you are 5. Get some table manners darl!


  12. Actually I was having Tea with Sir Gerald Kelly..old school know he had been an assistant to Rodin and Monet?..
    anyway Sir Gerald is three days older than kerosene so I asked him if it was copasetic to dunk.

    Unfortunately he fell off of his chair, poor bugger, demonstrably arguing that Dr J was the best dunker in history.

  13. Don't even think about dunking a jaffa cake. It's essential to dunk ginger nuts.

    On a point of etiquette - dunking used to be bad manners but now it's essential for upward mobility.

  14. CYBERPETE: Open your mouth right now and let me check for black crumbs, young man!

    HE: Rimshot!

    KAZ: Honestly, I can’t get past the image of Les Battersby when I hear the words “ginger nuts.”

  15. Botter is right, in a way. Peter Kaye can explain it better:

  16. black crumbs?

    I clean my teeth regularly thankyouverymuch

  17. Let me get this right now...your supposed to take the biscuits out of the packet to dunk? Yes??

  18. I do not love Canucks. That's a vicious and unfounded rumor.

  19. PITHER: Dip me again!

    CYBERPETE: Your teeth may be clean but look at the state of your shirt. Crumbs everywhere.

    Where's your bib?

    SID: Well I don't know how the Irish do it.

    MAIDY: Correction. You worship Canucks.

  20. Oh dear, oh dear

    how did you know my secret. How did you know I always have a box of oreos taped up under the kitchen counter?

    Your psychic powers amaze me

    Oreos is the only reason to have milk in the house you know.

  21. Blech! Oreos.

    The only biscuit worth dunking (and it has to be in coffee, not tea) is a ginger nut. For not longer than two seconds, and only one third to one half should be dunked.

    Although, at a push, a bourbon will do. Don't leave it in too long or the filling melts...

    * wonders what else Cyberpete has taped up under the counter, the perv *

  22. CYBERPETE AND IVD: My psychic powers tell me that both of you have Johnny Hazzard's joystick taped under your bedside tables.

  23. Not the same one, I hasten to add.

    * imagines the bloody halves of poor Mr Hazzard's cock gaffer taped to a couple of MDF tables *


  24. ewww

    trust MJ to make any such romantic relationship seedy

  25. IVD AND CYBERPETE: Is there something going on I should know about?

  26. Ah come on! Is there any question about this? Dunking is an art form on a par with, well, with other art forms. It's a war of nerves with yourself, and a battle of wills with a brittle biscuit. It's the Universe. It's wet. It falls away when you least expect it, the bastard. It's life, in fact, in one hot, soggy biscuit.

    No wonder it's all the craze in Japan.


  27. BOCK: I think the butter's slipped off your biscuit.

  28. biscuit must be kept on a vertical plane at all times and rolled out of the drink. This is the most structurally sound way of ensuring maximum integrity when dunking. Essential for me, as I like to dunk to the max.

  29. TICKERS: So you're saying I need a degree in physics and engineering to dunk.