Saturday, October 23, 2010

Me?...Intimate Odour?

[via]
Source: Dolly Magazine (Australia), March 1972.

If your friends aren’t this frank, we here at Infomaniac are.
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36 comments:

  1. LẌ8:00 PM, October 23, 2010

    "Me? ... Intimate Odour?"

    Oui.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tim F11:01 PM, October 23, 2010

    I always wonder whether models who appear in ads like this know what the product is.

    “What are we advertising?”

    “Um... nail polish.”

    “Not stinky clunge spray?”

    “Now what put that idea in your pretty little head?”

    ReplyDelete
  3. mrpeenee11:46 PM, October 23, 2010

    Intimate Odour? I thought somebody was having a barbecue.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Romeo Morningwood12:50 AM, October 24, 2010

    Damn those little tensions!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Roses4:29 AM, October 24, 2010

    What I want to know is this: if they're both dressed, how does the friend know?

    She must have one skanky vag.

    ReplyDelete
  6. CyberPete4:55 AM, October 24, 2010

    But surely deodorant only covers up the skanky stench, it doesn't cure you. So the cause of this vile affliction is still there once the deodorant wears off.

    It's probably either a hygiene issue or an PH balance thing.

    This was brought to you by Doctor Pete - we know all there is to know about female intimate hygiene.

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Mistress5:13 AM, October 24, 2010

    XL: "Me? ... Intimate Odour?"
    Oui.

    Oui have nothing to do with it.

    TIM FOOTMAN: I always wonder whether models who appear in ads like this know what the product is.
    “What are we advertising?”
    “Um... nail polish.”
    “Not stinky clunge spray?”
    “Now what put that idea in your pretty little head?”

    No matter where she goes, folk will point and say, “There goes that woman with the stinky clunge.”

    She’ll never get a date.

    PEENEE: Intimate Odour? I thought somebody was having a barbecue.

    How would you like a burnt weenie sandwich?

    DONN: Damn those little tensions!

    I’m having them today…keep your distance!

    ROSES: What I want to know is this: if they're both dressed, how does the friend know?
    She must have one skanky vag.

    Obviously she didn’t get our Sitting Pretty memo.

    CYBERPOOF: But surely deodorant only covers up the skanky stench, it doesn't cure you. So the cause of this vile affliction is still there once the deodorant wears off.
    It's probably either a hygiene issue or an PH balance thing.
    This was brought to you by Doctor Pete - we know all there is to know about female intimate hygiene.

    I can’t believe you’ve ever been anywhere near a fanny.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Roses5:30 AM, October 24, 2010

    I have to say, I agree with Cyberpete on this one. Spraying skanky vag with deoderant is just going to compound the odd odours.

    It can't taste very good either...

    (did I just type that out loud?)

    ReplyDelete
  9. CyberPete6:10 AM, October 24, 2010

    I assume skanky smelling vag on it's own is no chocolate fondant, Roses.

    Anyway, to answer your question MJ, no I haven't.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Mitzi 6:13 AM, October 24, 2010

    Hello Joyce, Mmmmm Your fanny smells fresh today.

    Yes it does Barbara, that's because I'm wearing vespre no more clamembert worries for me.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous6:57 AM, October 24, 2010

    Johnson&Johnson simply KNOWs what women want! Next logical step is an improofed clone (DOLLY magazine! Australia!)

    ReplyDelete
  12. The Mistress7:17 AM, October 24, 2010

    ROSES: I have to say, I agree with Cyberpete on this one. Spraying skanky vag with deoderant is just going to compound the odd odours.
    It can't taste very good either...
    (did I just type that out loud?)

    See CyberPete’s comment.

    CYBERPOOF: I assume skanky smelling vag on it's own is no chocolate fondant, Roses.
    Anyway, to answer your question MJ, no I haven't.

    What makes you such an expert then?

    MITZI: Hello Joyce, Mmmmm Your fanny smells fresh today.

    Yes it does Barbara, that's because I'm wearing vespre no more clamembert worries for me.

    “Clamembert”…very gooda!

    MAGO: Johnson&Johnson simply KNOWs what women want! Next logical step is an improofed clone (DOLLY magazine! Australia!)

    I’ll bet Princess has stacks of Dolly magazines under her bed.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Princess9:01 AM, October 24, 2010

    How very dare you! And where did you find that copy of my Photo Shoot? I was sure that I'd burnt all the original copies...
    My agent assured me that Beryl and I would be appearing in a an advert for a new product called "cafe bar".
    "Every secretary's dream" no more need for making everyones coffee and having to wash up. Let them make their own in these dinky little disposable cups with the cute little brown cup holders...

    Imagine my shock when our photos appeared advertising camouflage for " secret lady place" stench!

    And in "Dolly" of all mags, we were told that we would have a full page in "Secretarial Monthly"

    ReplyDelete
  14. hayward10:24 AM, October 24, 2010

    Should we be surprised that Jenny the nail biter has stinky cooch?

    ReplyDelete
  15. Manda10:35 AM, October 24, 2010

    No 'secret lady place' smells like Chanel no. 5! Gosh these adverts must've made women hate themselves! xD

    ReplyDelete
  16. The Mistress1:05 PM, October 24, 2010

    PRINCESS: How very dare you! And where did you find that copy of my Photo Shoot? I was sure that I'd burnt all the original copies...
    My agent assured me that Beryl and I would be appearing in a an advert for a new product called "cafe bar".
    "Every secretary's dream" no more need for making everyones coffee and having to wash up. Let them make their own in these dinky little disposable cups with the cute little brown cup holders...
    Imagine my shock when our photos appeared advertising camouflage for " secret lady place" stench!
    And in "Dolly" of all mags, we were told that we would have a full page in "Secretarial Monthly"

    How about “Secretaries’ Monthlies” where you could also do tampon advertising?

    HAYWARD: Should we be surprised that Jenny the nail biter has stinky cooch?

    I hope she doesn’t suck her thumb as well.

    MANDA: No 'secret lady place' smells like Chanel no. 5! Gosh these adverts must've made women hate themselves!

    Mine smelt of Guerlain Idylle yesterday when I accidentally spritzed in the wrong direction.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Geoff2:48 PM, October 24, 2010

    Maybe the recently departed Natasha off Corrie could have done with such a product. Not that you can smell through the screen but we had our suspicions.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Kapitano3:00 PM, October 24, 2010

    How come no one else has said it?

    Intimate odour?

    Kelly Smunt!

    ReplyDelete
  19. The Cool Cookie3:35 PM, October 24, 2010

    Why not get out the power washer and have at it.

    How come J&J never came out with MAN-Vepre for men who have a cheese issue?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous3:45 PM, October 24, 2010

    I can't read it - is the blue one the extra strong or the white one?

    ReplyDelete
  21. BEAST3:48 PM, October 24, 2010

    ***sprays febreze librally in Miss MJ's direction***
    I thought it was your shoes

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Mistress4:06 PM, October 24, 2010

    GEOFF: Maybe the recently departed Natasha off Corrie could have done with such a product. Not that you can smell through the screen but we had our suspicions.

    Natasha’s gone? Yay! Gail next, please.

    We are now TEN months behind the UK episodes.

    They’ve only just celebrated Christmas…2009!

    KAPI: How come no one else has said it?
    Intimate odour?
    Kelly Smunt!

    That reminds me…

    The Kelly Smunts haven’t dropped by yet today.

    MR. COOKIE: Why not get out the power washer and have at it.
    How come J&J never came out with MAN-Vepre for men who have a cheese issue?

    Hose it down!

    I think it was Margaret Cho who said, “If I wanted cheese I’d go to Whole Foods!”

    MAGO: I can't read it - is the blue one the extra strong or the white one?

    Either one can peel paint off your wall.

    BEAST: ***sprays febreze librally in Miss MJ's direction***
    I thought it was your shoes

    I thought it was your “Kipper Surprise”.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Roses4:12 PM, October 24, 2010

    I'm not into scraping cheese off the helmet.

    So many Shades of Wrong.

    I like pickles and crackers with my cheese.

    ReplyDelete
  24. The Mistress8:05 PM, October 24, 2010

    ROSES: I'm not into scraping cheese off the helmet.
    So many Shades of Wrong.
    I like pickles and crackers with my cheese.

    Help yourself to the Smörgåsbord.

    ReplyDelete
  25. LẌ8:08 PM, October 24, 2010

    SMEGgåsbord?

    ReplyDelete
  26. The Mistress8:11 PM, October 24, 2010

    XL: SMEGgåsbord?

    *drops cheese platter in disgust*

    ReplyDelete
  27. Manda8:15 PM, October 24, 2010

    That doesn't sound like an assortment of appetizers I would enjoy noshing on.. @ XL

    ReplyDelete
  28. The Mistress8:16 PM, October 24, 2010

    I'll let XL take it from here, Manda.

    I'm too busy preparing the Kipper Surprise.

    ReplyDelete
  29. LẌ8:18 PM, October 24, 2010

    Manda, not that there's anything wrong with that.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Damien2:58 AM, October 25, 2010

    Dearest Mistress,

    As you know I live with Chronic Clinical Depression. Its a bummer :(

    But on matter how bad the mood, how deep the funk, or how overpowering the sorrow, your little slice of heaven on the WWW brings a smile to my face. Even if - like now - it is a smile through tears.

    Thank you MJ for such a unique and wonderfully blissful blog.

    I love being your # 1 Infomaniac Slave.....

    **places single chaste kiss on each of Mistress' feet as is proper before standing and enfolding her in a big cubby down under hug**

    ReplyDelete
  31. Michael Guy6:02 AM, October 25, 2010

    I thought a 'Vespre' was a scooter I'd ride around Italy on with my 20-something lover...

    ReplyDelete
  32. The Mistress7:33 AM, October 25, 2010

    DAMIEN: Dearest Mistress,
    As you know I live with Chronic Clinical Depression. Its a bummer :(
    But on matter how bad the mood, how deep the funk, or how overpowering the sorrow, your little slice of heaven on the WWW brings a smile to my face. Even if - like now - it is a smile through tears.
    Thank you MJ for such a unique and wonderfully blissful blog.
    I love being your # 1 Infomaniac Slave.....
    **places single chaste kiss on each of Mistress' feet as is proper before standing and enfolding her in a big cubby down under hug**

    If only we had an anti-depression Vespre to spritz liberally all over you.

    *directs Slave Damien to Mistress MJ’s fainting chaise*

    There is always a place here for you.

    Take good care of yourself.

    MICHAEL GUY: I thought a 'Vespre' was a scooter I'd ride around Italy on with my 20-something lover...

    At least you’d be fresh for your Roman Holiday.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Damien8:04 AM, October 25, 2010

    I will Mistress.

    This is a very comfy fainting chaise..... could be the muscular houseboy I fainted onto ON the chaise tho....

    You take such good care of me :)

    ReplyDelete
  34. The Mistress8:45 AM, October 25, 2010

    DAMIEN: I will Mistress.
    This is a very comfy fainting chaise..... could be the muscular houseboy I fainted onto
    ON the chaise tho....
    You take such good care of me :)

    A hunky houseboy or two won’t necessarily lessen the pain but what’s the harm in trying?

    Canapé?

    ReplyDelete
  35. Damien7:35 PM, October 25, 2010

    *swoon* - a muscular houseboy, a chaise AND canapes.......

    slave loves his Mistress..... he really does :)

    ReplyDelete
  36. Ms Scarlet6:48 AM, October 26, 2010

    ...has she had Mr Beastie's kipper surprise in her knickers?
    Sx

    ReplyDelete

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