Friday, September 05, 2008

Filthy Friday

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68 comments:

  1. Jenny1:03 AM, September 05, 2008

    oh yeah.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jenny1:04 AM, September 05, 2008

    Happy Filthy Friday.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Old Knudsen1:08 AM, September 05, 2008

    I heated up two pokers and put my eyes out but still the picture is in my head. Why is he so bored looking? hes staring into my black soul.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Inexplicable DeVice1:45 AM, September 05, 2008

    Damn you, vile woman! I couldn't make out what was going on so I was forced to click-to-make-bigger and discover that as well as his tiny little penis hanging out of his knickers, the 'blemish' was actually the end of a dildo (I think).

    Knudsen - Can I borrow those pokers, please?

    ReplyDelete
  5. CyberPete2:12 AM, September 05, 2008

    Ew did you have to!?!

    I don't understand why IDV had to click it. Even on my ting iPhone screen it was quite clear. Some ugly fat person with something stuck up their arse.

    Why would anyone click on that?

    ReplyDelete
  6. BEAST2:13 AM, September 05, 2008

    I thought he had stuck a nicotine patch on his scrote......sadly I was wrong. He's been a bit uneven with his bra padding
    ***scrubs eyes with bleach***

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Mistress2:27 AM, September 05, 2008

    BOXER: First AND second!

    Take THAT, Eroswings.

    KNUDSEN: He’s bored because he’s seen that same old outfit on you a million times.

    Can’t you spice it up a bit?

    Maybe take off the cap? (And leave it absentmindedly for me to steal…if Boxer doesn’t get to it first).

    IVD: Thanks for reminding us about clicking to make bigger.

    I forgot to include that instruction under the pic.

    CYBERPOOF: You can’t wait to get home to click on it, can you?

    BEAST: Nicotine?

    Does seeing this make you want a fag?

    BITCHES: I’m enjoying an evening cocktail, resplendent in my peignoir, I might add; watching with amusement as you all recoil in mock horror at this week’s Filthy Friday image.

    I’ll retire to my boudoir shortly, content in the knowledge that you’ve all right-clicked and saved the image and that it will soon appear on your screens as wallpaper.

    ReplyDelete
  8. CyberPete6:39 AM, September 05, 2008

    I would never click on a picture you post on filthy friday.

    And yes you can consider it a dare

    ReplyDelete
  9. Leah8:15 AM, September 05, 2008

    A bit limp, but the serial-killer eyes more than made up for it. Thanks Mistress!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous8:17 AM, September 05, 2008

    Shouldn't he have a happier look on his face?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ginro9:54 AM, September 05, 2008

    My first thought was 'bloody hell but she's ugly!' And then I saw the family jewels...I think I'm going to be sick. I am only young and innocent you know.

    ReplyDelete
  12. The Mistress10:29 AM, September 05, 2008

    CYBERPOOF: You’ll do it.

    After you’ve finished having your hair styled, of course.

    LEAH: When he’s Brooklyn he’ll look you up.

    MAXI: The elastic in his hold-ups is cutting off his circulation.

    GINRO: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    Young and innocent, are you?

    Mistress MJ will drape a protective arm around you until the naughty boy within is comfortable and feels at home here.

    ReplyDelete
  13. eroswings10:56 AM, September 05, 2008

    You know, I could've sworn I left a comment earlier, but the trauma of the picture must've messed with my mind...

    Still, I can see why he's not happy...he won't be until he's had his surgery to become a woman...he's probably saving up for it. That's why he can't afford to pay for matching bra and panties...

    ReplyDelete
  14. garfer11:38 AM, September 05, 2008

    At least he could have made the effort to find a matching set of bra and knickers.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Heff11:48 AM, September 05, 2008

    Is that Dr. Phil McGraw ?!?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Barlinnie11:57 AM, September 05, 2008

    What a repulsive old cunt. The thought of that horrible fucking oik slobbering over porno mags while he inserts a dildo up his arse is simply too much.
    If the pleasure is so much of a turn on, why hasn't he got a stiffy? MJ, explain for us all what pleasure is gained through having your chocolate starfish intruded upon, becaue I'm at a loss to understand it.

    The best thing that can happen to this bawbag is if somebody sets fire to him then extinguishes the flames with a large shovel.

    Great post by the way.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Mu Tai Dong12:04 PM, September 05, 2008

    He not the erection despite anal fumblngs!!! He need the PELOOP TM from my blog buy!!

    ReplyDelete
  18. The Mistress12:37 PM, September 05, 2008

    EROS: You and Boxer were competing last night for first place but she shoved you out of the way.

    In your stupor, you left a comment on the previous post but fell out of the ring before you could comment on Filthy Friday.

    GARFY: Would you have gone for the all-pink satin set?

    HEFF: If it’s Dr. Phil he’ll never be invited back on Oprah again.

    BOLLIX: What makes you think I know anything about the pleasure of chocolate starfish insertion?

    Bend over and do the research yourself!

    MS. DONG: He is the perfect candidate for the purchase of the PELOOP!

    Let’s hope he has better luck achieving and maintaining an erection with it than The BEAST did.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Jenny12:42 PM, September 05, 2008

    Can I use that "I thought I left a comment" excuse in the future when I'm slacking? 'Cuz it's a good one.

    and you know, the Dude DOES look like Dr. Phil.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous12:58 PM, September 05, 2008

    He's not happy because he IS Dr. Phil McGraw and his last book, "Living Life as a Pathetic Man But Really Wanting to Be a Woman So I Have to Stuff a Dildo Up my Arse", didn't fly off the shelves as everyone thought it would.

    ReplyDelete
  21. INNER VOICES1:00 PM, September 05, 2008

    gah!! not again... i remember once there was a lady posted in a filthy friday...

    *trys to remember a happier time*

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous1:08 PM, September 05, 2008

    Wrong, just plain wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  23. BEAST1:09 PM, September 05, 2008

    ***flicks MJ with Peeloop***

    ReplyDelete
  24. The Mistress1:18 PM, September 05, 2008

    BOXER: Don’t sink to Eroswings’ level.

    RANDOM: Doesn’t Dr. Phil pull all his advice out of his arse?

    VOICES: Was it this lady?

    CATSCRATCH: Where did I go wrong?

    BEAST: Contact Miss Mu immediately for a refund on your useless PELOOP.

    Your lack of stiffness is a big disappointment.

    It appears your PELOOP is only good for flicking at bloggers such as me and even then, I didn’t feel a thing.

    ReplyDelete
  25. INNER VOICES1:37 PM, September 05, 2008

    another day in the life of a filthy friday...

    ReplyDelete
  26. The Mistress1:41 PM, September 05, 2008

    VOICES: I just checked and apparently I've been posting "Filthy Fridays" since January 2007.

    And what thanks do I get???

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anonymous1:50 PM, September 05, 2008

    THANKS MJ for making us all want to stab our eyes out with a hot poker. You really make our Fridays.

    And yes, I do believe Dr. Phil has all of his advice, along with his dildo, stuff way up his arse.

    ReplyDelete
  28. INNER VOICES1:54 PM, September 05, 2008

    ummm... well... i guess so....

    wait... what thanks again?

    *channels first nations soul*

    i need a xanax here people.

    *wakes up naked with "first nations 4 eva!" scratched into his chest on mjs back door*

    ReplyDelete
  29. The Mistress2:08 PM, September 05, 2008

    RANDOM & VOICES: Would the pair of you shut up for five minutes?

    SOME of us have work to do.

    ReplyDelete
  30. INNER VOICES2:23 PM, September 05, 2008

    hmmm... shut up and voices... im not sure its possible... but for you anything... Shut up is a colloquial phrase meaning "be quiet" and referring to "close your mouth", usually considered to be rude. Usually said from anger. In recent years, it has taken on an additional meaning of incredulity or even in some contexts, "tell me more!" It may also refer to:

    * Shut Up (and Sleep With Me), a single by Sin With Sebastian
    * Shut Up (Black Eyed Peas song)
    * Shut Up (Blink-182 song), a song by Blink-182, from their album "Take Off Your Pants and Jacket"
    * Shut Up (Bloodhound Gang song), a song by the Bloodhound Gang from their album One Fierce Beer Coaster
    * Shut Up (Kelly Osbourne album), a 2003 album
    * Shut Up (Kelly Osbourne song) a single from the same album
    * Shut Up (LaFee album), a 2008 album
    * Shut Up (LaFee song) a single from the same album
    * Shut Up (Lush song), a 1996 B-side to Ladykillers, by the group Lush
    * Shut Up (Madness song)
    * Shut Up (Nick Lachey song)
    * Shut Up Shuttin Up, a song off the Victor album
    * Shut Up! (Simple Plan song)
    * Shut Up (Trick Daddy song), a song recorded by Trick Daddy in 2000
    * Shut the Fuck up is also now a commonly used phrase....


    i could provide some shut the fuck up links as well if you like!!!

    ReplyDelete
  31. eroswings4:10 PM, September 05, 2008

    MJ, it's true that Anonymous Boxer knocked me out--I ran out of air while in between her kickboxing thighs. The results speak for themselves: I became confused by the oxygen deprivation, but she came first! And then she came again immediately after!

    ReplyDelete
  32. CyberPete6:34 PM, September 05, 2008

    well the hair IS very important

    Still won't look though

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  33. Anonymous6:39 PM, September 05, 2008

    Seems to be some self-made dildo. May be he's just testing ...

    ReplyDelete
  34. Peevish McSnark7:23 PM, September 05, 2008

    I can't remember who said it before, but jeez! He gets all dressed up and shoves a dildo up his keister and he can't get a stiffy after that? Why fucking bother?

    Well, I hope he at least feels pretty.

    ReplyDelete
  35. sEa7:57 PM, September 05, 2008

    um, not so pretty in his wife's underthangs... but at least he got the garters right

    and that is quite a fancy-dancy nauga sofa he is perch-ed upon

    ReplyDelete
  36. Jenny10:16 PM, September 05, 2008

    Eroswings - I could have had a third too. Just sayin'.

    ReplyDelete
  37. INNER VOICES11:32 PM, September 05, 2008

    was quiet for rest of day...
    wheres mj?

    ReplyDelete
  38. The Mistress12:18 AM, September 06, 2008

    VOICES: Dummy up, would ya?

    EROS: That gal’s a trooper.

    CYBERPOOF: Hair AND shoes.

    But I don’t have to tell YOU that.

    MAGO: Yes, he could be testing for a living.

    Please refer to a previous posting I did on sex toy testers.

    PEEVISH: Watching her leave I heard the bartender say
    "She ain't pretty she just looks that way"

    SEA: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    Looks like he bought the sofa at The Brick.

    BOXER: Yeah, Eros. She coulda.

    VOICES: You again?

    ReplyDelete
  39. The Mistress12:50 AM, September 06, 2008

    EROS: Apologies for deleting your comments on my Saturday posting but I deleted the posting.

    I have too much work this weekend to be able to blog so instead I just scrapped the post.

    I'll be back on Monday.

    ReplyDelete
  40. eroswings1:06 AM, September 06, 2008

    Hey, at least I know I'm not losing my mind and actually posted a comment! See ya Monday!

    ReplyDelete
  41. CyberPete1:39 AM, September 06, 2008

    lazy cow!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Tickersoid7:30 AM, September 06, 2008

    So it's just me that finds this strangely arousing then?

    ReplyDelete
  43. pissoff10:42 AM, September 06, 2008

    I think so Tick.

    I've got to remember not to go to your blog site when my children are standing behind me. I know have to poke their eyes out with a hot poker.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Ms Smack11:02 AM, September 06, 2008

    Apparently MJ, the best thing about sleeping with a transvestite is reaching around and thinking that your cock has gone all the way thru!

    ReplyDelete
  45. Romeo Morningwood11:21 AM, September 06, 2008

    What a dreadful waste of Amino Acids.

    Hopefully Science will soon possess the technology to melt him down, rearrange his molecules, after a vigorous, thorough, scrubbing mind you, and then make something beautiful.

    Perhaps a thousand Butterflys that could merrily flutter about the dew drenched garden in the morning sunlight.

    Cue Grieg's 'Morning'

    ah, that's much better.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Jenny12:23 PM, September 06, 2008

    A day off?

    I'm actually glad to hear that.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Jenny12:23 PM, September 06, 2008

    so Eros WAS first?

    bah. Damn second martini.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Miss Smuggersham7:43 PM, September 06, 2008

    He looks like Oprah's boyfriend.

    ReplyDelete
  49. The Mistress10:09 PM, September 06, 2008

    EROS: My posting for Saturday was shit anyway.

    I’ll try for something better on Monday.

    CYBERPOOF: Pfffftttt.

    TICKERS: The rest of them just won’t admit it but I know they’ve all clicked and saved the pic.

    At least you’re honest.

    And just a bit poofy.

    PISSOFF: I’m sure it’s nothing they haven’t seen out behind the barn.

    MS.SMACK: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    I recognize you as a friend of Mr. Mutley but I won’t hold that against you.

    DONNNNN: Let’s be full of Canadian pride and cue “Hinterland Who’s Who” instead.

    BOXER: Eros is literally sitting on my blog.

    T-BIRD: Steadman?

    ReplyDelete
  50. Cece1:11 AM, September 07, 2008

    You crack me up both with your porn humor and your comments back. This guy has major issues. MAJOR ISSUES.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Brad Stitt4:17 AM, September 07, 2008

    I sometimes like to insert a digit into my anus when I masterbate it makes me tingle.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Inexplicable DeVice4:39 AM, September 07, 2008

    Aaaarrrgh! Get rid of it!

    * tries desperately to imagine Donnnnn's thousand butterflies *

    ReplyDelete
  53. Anonymous8:24 AM, September 07, 2008

    He doesnt seem to be having much fun despite all that effort....

    ReplyDelete
  54. The Mistress9:39 AM, September 07, 2008

    CECILE: Don’t his MAJOR ISSUES make you feel better about yourself though?

    BRAD: Is that why you’ve been gone so long?

    Try a full fist for an extra special tingling sensation.

    IVD: I seem to be stuck imagining 1,000 pupae.

    MUTLEY: Obviously he is not based in the Fun Capital of the World…BRIDPORT!

    ReplyDelete
  55. BEAST9:40 AM, September 07, 2008

    Oh god its still here :-(

    ReplyDelete
  56. The Mistress9:42 AM, September 07, 2008

    BEAST: And YOU'RE still here!

    I thought I'd lost you to the water-winged women of Bournemouth.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Daisy10:04 AM, September 07, 2008

    wtf...

    ReplyDelete
  58. Tickersoid11:34 AM, September 07, 2008

    Beast pretends not to like it but.....he keeps comming back.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Olga, the Traveling Bra12:16 PM, September 07, 2008

    WTF?!?!? There's waaaaaaaaay too many things goin' on in the picture.....and none of 'em are good!

    ReplyDelete
  60. The Mistress12:39 PM, September 07, 2008

    DAISY: "wtf"...

    Welcome To Finland?

    I think you've strayed too far off the map.

    TICKERS: Beast likes it SO much that he sometimes comes round here twice a day!

    Did you know that Beast is a shape-shifting reptile?

    OLGA: You're just lucky it's not a BLACK BRA that he's wearing!

    ReplyDelete
  61. Anonymous1:12 PM, September 07, 2008

    Lovely ... back into therapy I go.

    ReplyDelete
  62. BEAST1:29 PM, September 07, 2008

    Oh No Miss MJ , I have just got back from Ma Beaties surprise Birthday weekend , and its raining , so no beach for me today :-(

    ReplyDelete
  63. The Mistress1:35 PM, September 07, 2008

    MAIDY: Your therapist should never have let you loose.

    Did he grant you outpatient status?

    BEAST: I am disappointed that I wasn't permitted to do the cake farting at Ma Beastie's party.

    Did you know that IVD sometimes frequents the Bournemouth Pier when he's run out of punters at the Norwich docks?

    ReplyDelete
  64. Anonymous2:17 PM, September 07, 2008

    No outpatient status yet. Still all wrapped up here in the psych ward. I'm getting better at typing with a pencil in my mouth.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Mr Pineapples4:11 PM, September 07, 2008

    re your pic:

    why is that woman dressed up as a man?

    ReplyDelete
  66. Carnalis5:07 PM, September 07, 2008

    *runs off with cap while no-one was paying attention*

    ReplyDelete
  67. Leah7:25 PM, September 07, 2008

    upon second viewing,

    ...gruesome...

    ...like crime scene photos, it's even more chilling the longer you look...

    this guy needs some pants.

    ReplyDelete
  68. The Mistress10:07 PM, September 07, 2008

    MAIDY: A pencil in your mouth?

    Makes a change from the usual cock.

    MR.PINEAPPLES: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    Get used to gender bending when you visit here.

    Now be a good lad and put on this frock.

    CARNALIS: Is that Old Knudsen’s cap you’ve stolen?

    You conniving bitch!

    LEAH: Back awayyy from the terminal.

    ReplyDelete

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