Friday, December 01, 2006

Stupid Places You’ve Put Your Tongue

Every Canadian has done this and yes, it hurts…

In sub-zero temperatures, do not stick your tongue on a cold metal pole.

An 11-year-old boy in Kelowna, British Columbia learned the hard way that poles are not Popsicles when his tongue became fused to the pole of a stop sign.

An RCMP officer was flagged down by a group of kids, poured water on the boy’s tongue and freed him from the pole.

Why does your tongue get stuck to metal in the winter? Um, because you’re stupid? Well there’s a scientific explanation.

Not only have I had my tongue stuck to a fence in winter, I’ve also had my tongue stuck in a pop bottle.

And the rest of you? Stupid places you’ve put your tongue?


  1. hi MJ, I do wish I have a chance to let my tongue get stuck on a pole. yep maybe I am stupid :) just because we have no winter here... hehe

    thanks for your visit at my blog, your blog is cool, sure be back soon :P

    just hope won't see the "Lazy" sign :)

  2. I stuck my tongue to my dogs metal drinking bowl in sub zero temperatures. And not just a little part of my tongue, pretty much the whole thing.

    Ouch, it hurts just thinking about it.

  3. I stuck my tongue in a Pop Tart and received a nasty burn

  4. On the porch railings of our house in Winnipeg and on my last boyfriend. Both events ended badly.

  5. well there was this really dumb girl i hooked up with once...i knew i shouldn't do it but....

  6. Vince: That’s right… rub it in about no winter in Malaysia. Slim chance of you getting your tongue stuck on anything during a cyclone then, is there?

    I’m pleased you like it here but I can’t guarantee you won’t see the lazy sign again as some bloggers (I won’t name and shame them) call me a lazy cunt. Just so you know.

    Jody: Right! So far you are the frontrunner for stupidest tongue manoeuvre.

    Frobi: Rumour has it that you’ve stuck your tongue in quite a number of tarts.

    Raincoaster: So you had to move all the way to the west coast to escape risk of frozen tongue temptations such as the railings of Winnipeg? How did you fare this week with the cold snap? Tempted to stick out your tongue? Eh? I can’t hear you. Cat got your tongue?

    Pamer: “Once hooked up with”… past tense. In other words, there was no second date after that!

  7. yeah...i copped off. It was a one off then I did a runner

  8. Stuck my tongue in a Carly once - it was like licking a 12v car battery. Won't be doing that again.
    Also set off a mousetrap with my tongue once, which did rather hurt. Preferred the trap to the Carly though.

  9. Pamer: I hope you left no forwarding address.

    SID: Well that explains your uncontrollable facial tic. I was just about to award you prize for stupidest place you’ve put your tongue when along came Steve…

    Steve: You have just surpassed Jody (and SID) in the race for Stupidest Places You’ve Put Your Tongue. Not the bit about Carly… the mousetrap. Is that how you practice rodent control in Dorset?

  10. I licked a Pole once. Can't remember his name.

  11. Kapitano: It's happened to the best of us.

  12. I put mine in the washing machine once. Well, it kept escaping from my mouth while I was at work one day, so I stuffed it in my pocket. Once home, I put a wash on, forgetting about my tongue.

    I can still taste the washing powder now. Ariel automatic, I think it was?

  13. Like Frobisher, I once stuck my tongue in a tart. The whole experience was like Billingsgate fish market. I felt I had not been her only gentleman caller since her last douch.
    Being part English, I was too polite to protest and carried on regardless.

  14. My tongue has never been anywhere except in my mouth.

    And a couple of others.

    Oh and maybe once up someone's arse.

  15. My tongue has never been anywhere it wasn't supposed to.

    But I can think of a couple stupid places that Jack can stick his.

  16. Tickers - that tart wasn't a Carly was it? Leaves a taste like radioactive sushi in your mouth....

  17. IDV: A witches tongue shouldn’t be over-watered.

    Tickers: What would the Welsh part of you have done?

    Piggy: There’s nothing quite like a tongue up the arse, is there?

    Awaiting: Open the freezer and get Jack to stick his tongue to the ice. Then laugh and walk away.

    Steve: Radioactive sushi? Isn’t that what poisoned that Russian spy, Alexander Litvinenko? Is Carly a Mata Hari?

  18. Or better yet, freeze the toilet lid and convince him to lick it.

    Now that there is a pic that would be worth a thousand words.

    *off to plan the demise of the husband*

    Am I the only one who sees the wrongness in that!?

  19. I'm from Vancouver Island... my tongue doesn't usually get stuck on poles.

    Hmmmmm, just don't ask for a tossed salad and I'm happy.

  20. Awaiting: See Ashes and Urns posting.

    Pissoff: You had your chance this week!

  21. I can't believe I didn't comment on this post. I guess I was tongue-tied.

  22. WW: You Winterpegonians should be experts on tongues stuck to metal objects in the cold!

  23. In a bottle of rubber cement.