Sunday, September 08, 2013

Let's Bring Back: Part One, A-C

Welcome to Part One of "Let's Bring Back." If you missed our discussion on what this is all about, click here.

Note: Links for some of the following words/terms are provided if your first language is not English...or for those of you who are still too young to live at the Villa of Queens Old Homosexuals' Haven Retirement Home and would not know what a "car tail fin" was if it fell off and hit you on the head.

Let's bring back...

Aging naturally



The Advanced Style blog and book show stylish older women, living life to the fullest. Please try to avoid the Jocelyn Wildenstein look and age as nature intended you to. Every wrinkle tells a story, don't it?



At-home doctor visits



I don't know about you Bitches, but when I'm feeling poorly, I don't fancy travelling across town to wait for two hours in a waiting room full of sick people, another half hour waiting in the examining room, and then making the return trip home. And yet, that's exactly what I have to do. Calling Dr. Kildare!

Oh, and while we're on the topic, I was recently given the option of having this instead of seeing a doctor face-to-face in the actual room with me. I'm not living at a remote weather station in Antarctica or a small archipelago in the middle of the ocean, ffs!



Attention spans (are you Bitches still with me?)



Bandstands



Music in an outdoor setting, free and accessible to all.



Beautiful train stations (e.g. New York’s Penn Station was an architectural treasure before its demolition in 1963)



Let's bring back the death penalty for developers who don't respect architectural heritage.



The Carol Burnett Show



Reruns of The Carol Burnett Show would be a welcome break from reality television. In the meantime, thank goodness we have our Thom's Redundant Variety Hour!


Car tail fins





I chrome and fins.

I can't tell a modern Honda Accord from a Honda Civic from a Toyota Camry. Bring back automotive style, design and character.


Courtship



Woo before you screw.

AyeM8y asked yesterday, "Can we bring back casual sex and one night stands?" So there may be some dissension amongst you regarding the revival of courtship.


Covered bridges



Also known as "kissing bridges." What a perfect place to court your sweetheart. Or give him a blowjob if you're AyeM8y.



Which of the above would you Bitches like to bring back?

And would you add anything to this "A-C" list?

Come back soon for Let's Bring Back: Part Two.

40 comments:

  1. I'll have to come back, there is so much here.
    I have been very lucky to have been around all these things including working at Grand Central Terminal in NYC and blow jobs at my local covered bridge while driving a '61 caddy...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. WALLY: Now you can see why I'm posting the lists in installments rather than all at once.

      Thankfully, Grand Central Station is still standing and hasn’t been turned into a parking lot or condos.

      Mistress MJ has been known to frequent the Oyster Bar at Grand Central on several occasions.

      Delete
    2. Really, I was a manager there for a couple of years....

      Perhaps we met?

      Delete
    3. Crikey.

      I hope that wasn't you I blew in the toilets.

      Delete
    4. No, dear, there's always a valet on duty in the men's room...

      Delete
    5. Maybe it was the valet she gave a blowjob to. Jx

      Delete
    6. That will be quite enough, thank you.

      Delete
  2. "Bring back automotive style, design and character"

    YES! My first and most cherished car was a 1956 Chevrolet.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gorgeous car LX. I don't remember those unfortunately. I vaguely remember my dad's Torino back in the 70's.

      Delete
    2. LX: *clicks 56 Chevy link*

      I feel oddly turned on.

      HUGGY JON: As you probably know, the Torino was known as a muscle car back in the day.

      Delete
    3. It was the beginning of the tail fin era, so the 1956 Chevy had a nice set as well. The fuel filler cap was located behind the driver side tail light, much to the confusion of gas station attendants.

      The Torinos were nice and could be had with insanely powerful engines.

      Delete
  3. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,

    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    Can we fuck now?

    and finally yes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HUGGY JON: You’re just a gal who can’t say no.

      Delete
  4. Oh my heart flutters with nostalgia on reading this post MJ. Apart from the memory's that might be associated with covered bridges... We don't have them here in Oz... A blowjob under the bridge was far more of a common occurance...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PRINNY: Then you may appreciate this 1964 song by The Drifters which describes a tryst between a man and his lover Under the Boardwalk.

      While a boardwalk isn’t quite the same thing as a bridge, and the man in question doesn’t specifically mention a blowjob, he DOES say they’ll be “making love.”

      Naturally, I read something into the lyrics, “you can almost taste the hot dogs”

      …after all, the singer doesn’t state whether his beloved is a man or a woman.

      And bonus (in my opinion, anyway)…it’s not a rap song.

      Delete
    2. Let us be grateful that "rap songs" will not be among the "let's bring back..." items. Jx

      Delete
    3. JON: Rap, along with Crocs, is Banned By Infomaniac.

      Delete
    4. Big ‘n’ beefy, Norma.

      Just the way you like 'em.

      Delete
  5. Thankfully, in the UK we do have a profusion of preserved railway stations and bandstands - largely due to the sterling efforts of Sir John Betjeman. [Who aged naturally, but would not have been seen dead driving a car with wings. Nor, probably, giving a blowjob on or under a bridge, covered (what's that?) or not.] Jx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JON: I was pleased to see a number of bandstands in England when Googling on the topic.

      If John Betjeman's a "saviour of beautiful buildings" as you described him in your post, I can forgive him for not "driving a car with wings."

      The world's historic buildings need more of his kind.

      Delete
    2. p.s. Click on the "Covered Bridges" link for a Wikipedia description.

      Delete
  6. We have many bandstands with free concerts, on the beach, on the boardwalk, in the many parks and town square. It's been an institution that the whole town has taken advantage of for hundreds of years.

    As for casual sex and one night stands vs. dating and wooing, there is a difference. Men in a gay bar before 1:00 A.M. are the ones to be dated and wooed and the men left over after 1:00 A.M. are the ones to be fucked.

    The latter are the ones that need to learn the difference.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AYEM8Y & NORMA: Really, it is so hard to keep up with you gays and your ways.

      Delete
  7. Have forgotten what was on the list.... err... did it make mention of an attention span? I'm sure that back in the days of Yore that mine used to be longer.
    Qx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MISS SCARLET: Did someone mention attention spans?

      Delete
    2. just the cream here at
      infopedia, just the tippity-top.

      Delete
  8. About the attention span thing... I don't think it has ever left, we only use it in non-creative ways.

    Think of all the hours we spend in front of our computor surfing the net (for porn), or those long evenings spent watching tv, or all those hours we spend in the middle of the night, lying in bed, unable to go to sleep and thinking about all the bad stuff that could happen, imagining all kinds of tragic scenarios and what we would do... scenario that will never happen or if they do, they happen in a way we didn't foresee so all our planning is of no use whatsoever...

    Am I gettin too philosophical here?

    Hey bartender, could you pour some vodka in my Shirley Temple, please. No Wally, I'm not driving you home tonight!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HUGGY JON: I’m off to watch telly right NOW as a matter of fact.

      I really do believe our attention spans have decreased compared to previous generations, perhaps because we have more distractions…specifically technological distractions such as the Internet, etc.

      I don’t meet as many people anymore who spend quality time pondering the state of our society and the role we play in it; how our society has evolved over time, how it is improving in some ways yet deteriorating in other ways, and what we can do to change it for the better.

      I have a few good friends with whom I can have meaningful conversations but I find some people don’t give a lot of thought to issues nor do they seem to care.

      Delete
    2. Thank you for the links, Herr Mago.

      Delete
  9. There's an attractive bandstand in Beverley, during the Christmas period, the Sally army band gathers together to play festive tunes to the shoppers, band members stand at each compass point collecting money from passers-by. I'm quite happy to give them a few coppers, as long as they don't rattle their tins. Oh, and bring back hanging!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MITZI: Who would you hang first?

      We want names.

      Delete
  10. MAGO: I’m not joking.

    In Germany, I believe it’s known as telemedizin.

    ReplyDelete

  11. #1: CHARACTER? why, i've got enough character to out meryl streep meryl streep! i'd be thrilled to erase some of this etched character
    (see #2).

    #2: IN-HOME DOCTOR VISITS? isn't this why they invented botox parties? (p.s the expression on doctor love's face says he knows exactly what he's about to gaze upon.)

    #3: ATTENTION SPANS? like i said, the crema of the crema. please show your ivy league diploma before entering your password, thank you.

    #4: there are bandstands around darling. guess you need to move.

    #5: pretty buildings are nice.

    #6: i want entire carol burnett shows, not someone's idea of the sketchs i'd like to see. (p.s. just watched a pretty good interview of carol & susie essman on david steinberg's show, another canadian you might've heard of.)

    #7: i wouldn't hold your breath for tail fins on cars. gills perhaps. i feel cadillac likes to make us feel as IF a fin might appear, but it could just be me.

    #8: i'll see you at the bar about 1:25AM.

    #9: i live in minneapolis. we're more concerned about
    our bridges collapsing than having a cute roof.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. NORMA: I am TRYING to watch TV and you come out with a novella.

      Talk to Huggy Jon about bridges.

      He lives in Montreal where no less than 24 bridges and tunnels are in "critical" condition. They are literally crumbling.

      David Steinberg? Do the words “Booga, Booga!” indicate I’ve heard of him?

      Are Botox parties the new Tupperware parties? Or is it like a Mary Kay party where, if you sell enough make-up, you get a pink Cadillac?

      Delete
    2. Even atheists pray God before crossing any bridge in Montreal.

      Delete