Princess and Wally and Cookie all turned fifty in 2012.
Who else out there has turned fifty and can offer Prinny, Wally and Cookie some sisterly advice on what to expect from here on?
And which of you Bitches will be turning fifty in the near future?
By the way, Princess, Wally and Cookie are now eligible for a room at the Infomaniac "Villa of Queens" Old Homosexuals' Haven Retirement Home.
Because 50 is 75 in gay years, isn't it?
In 62? I was busy proposing to Little Edie.
ReplyDeleteJASON: Are you one of the Kennedys?
Delete...AND LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO HER YOU ANIMAL. She's feeding raccoons in the attic and wearing weird scarves! *runs off sobbing*
Delete62? I wasn't even a sperm with a sense of direction yet! And 50 in gay years is 80 bitch! Thanks heavens for my fountain of youth.
ReplyDeleteMISTRESS MADDIE: Your sperm have been all over the place, since.
DeleteThis time in 1962? Just getting over the Cuban Missile Crisis.
ReplyDeleteVON LX: Did you learn how to “duck and cover?”
Deleteyou have approximately 3-4 more years
ReplyDeleteand then, without warning, the transmission will fall out.
NORMA: Did a tranny fall out of your fanny?
Delete"double a....m-c-o. tell them zsa zsa sent you."
DeleteI'm 57, which in gay years is non-existent. And Norma is sooooo right, of course. The downhill slope from ere on out is steep and slippery.
ReplyDeletePEENEE: I just slipped on your Geritol spillage.
DeleteI was still a twinkle in 1962... and let us not speak of such things again.
ReplyDeleteSx
MISS SCARLET: Is fifty a four-letter word?
DeleteBorn in 1961, I was sucking milk out of a plastic teet, shitting my diapers and playing with myself whenever John Kennedy came on the TV. Little did I know that the fabulousness would come after age 50!
ReplyDeleteTOPHER: There was TV in 1961?
DeleteNot reaching that milestone till next August, I can only imagine that in November 1962 I was a zygote, waiting to develop. Not sure if zygotes wear feather boas. Jx
ReplyDeleteJON: In your case, I’m sure that zygotes wear feather boas.
DeleteI’m reserving a room for you in advance at the Villa of Queens.
I'm a child of the 70s. If anyone asks my age, I say "I'm mid spring to early summer". If One is spared, I've got over a decade to go before reaching autumn.
ReplyDelete*cues Nat King Cole for Mitzi*
DeleteIsn't 50 the new 30?
ReplyDeleteIn '62 I was jealous of Caroline's pony, Macaroni.
Relive those painful moments here, Margaret.
DeleteBy the way, Mistress MJ had ponies. That’s right. Ponies PLURAL.
oh god, one of those girls with a horse issue.
DeleteThat's why MJ throws her head back laughs like one.
DeleteNORMA & MARGARET: Mistress MJ grew up in a tiny agricultural village.
DeleteEveryone had a pony.
Canadian Commoner, eh?
DeleteI refuse to give evidence, you'll be contacted by my lawyers.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday to all the broads!
MAGO: Is that a tort I smell or has someone left the door to The Smeg open?
DeleteI just want to know if the accommodation offers dormitory style or is it single room only....
ReplyDeletePRINNY: You may share a room with the Infomaniac Bitch of your choice.
DeleteShare? Not me dear. Imagine sharing with Prinny - we'd be perpetually surrounded by chorus-line costumes and Miss Gulch memorabilia :-) Jx
DeleteI'd be spitting out feathers each time I left your room!
DeleteWell, that answers the "spit or swallow" question!
DeleteAfter 50? Menopause, hair in weird places, no hair in formerly hairy places (my palms are just like everyone elses' now)and a raging desire to hump young men. So it's just like any other age except for the hair thing, unless you were one of those bald babies,or an excessively hairy baby, or you have a uterus. Mine is standing out on the porch right now and can't come back in unless it apologizes.
ReplyDeleteNATIONS: At least your uterus is not a choking hazard like mine.
DeleteIn 1962 I was on a jolly jumper most of the day inhaling second hand smoke, dirtying cloth diapers, and spilling bowls of food down the sides of the high chair and all over floor. Those were the days. And you Mistress MJ?
ReplyDeleteRILEY: And me? Check out the photo and judge for yourself.
Delete