Saturday, January 02, 2010

Vice Advice



Mistress MJ finds New Year’s resolutions tiresome, don’t you?

So instead of making the usual vows of self-improvement, she is looking for a new vice.

Your suggestions for nasty habits are welcome.

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27 comments:

  1. LẌ9:06 PM, January 01, 2010

    1st!

    ReplyDelete
  2. LẌ9:10 PM, January 01, 2010

    Perhaps The Mistress might consider a convent?

    ReplyDelete
  3. normadesmond10:00 PM, January 01, 2010

    perhaps mistress should watch "lady sings the blues" as a primer?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Damien10:23 PM, January 01, 2010

    I'm thinking four permanent houseboys - 1 white boy, 1 Black man, 1 asian lad, 1 latin - with lots and lots of meaningless fantastic sex. And you never have to make a meal or wash a dish again - *Sigh* - thats how Id do it.

    ReplyDelete
  5. savannah10:34 PM, January 01, 2010

    ok, 4th place, i'll take it...xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  6. jason10:40 PM, January 01, 2010

    Projecting ping pong balls from your secret lady place?

    though that's less of a "vice" than a "vocation"

    ReplyDelete
  7. CyberPete3:17 AM, January 02, 2010

    I'd mention Valium but I'm sure you're already dipping into those.

    Sex with strangers? You are probably already doing that too. Ménage a six (my French is, like my arse, not what it used to be)

    I like the ping pong ball suggestion.

    I'll be in my budoir trying out Damiens suggestion.

    By the way, you could try sex with little people (read. Politically incorrect midgets)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Inexplicable DeVice4:02 AM, January 02, 2010

    Oh, Jason. You don't know MJ at all, do you. She'd never be able to do the ping pong ball trick what with being as slack as she is... She'd need something like a spacehopper.

    ...

    Yikes! I think I just channeled Piggy!

    ...

    Sorry about that, MJ. As for a vice - How about not ironing your clothes? Or leaving the top off the sauce bottle? Ooh! Or not rinsing the bath out once you've done?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Kapitano4:14 AM, January 02, 2010

    A new vice? How about...

    House Girls?!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Roses4:26 AM, January 02, 2010

    I took up smoking last year.

    I'd definitely recommend it. One of the best supporters of sanity I've found. And you get to offend lots of people.

    Apart from that, I don't know what to suggest. After all, I pop on here for new ideas.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Princess4:47 AM, January 02, 2010

    Dear Mistress

    I am astounded!
    I thaught you aready had an extensive knowledge and practice of all vices.
    Might I suggest Celibacy from all of them for 2010!

    Luv Princess XXX

    I'm sure that Mr Inexplicabe can suggest some thing... He is the master of "De Vice" after all.

    ReplyDelete
  12. eroswings4:50 AM, January 02, 2010

    Vice? Are you looking for a second in command? Or a clamping tool? I'm sure your houseboys can make use of both.

    Have you thought about clubbing a seal pup? Or a going on a whale hunt?

    ReplyDelete
  13. The Mistress9:44 AM, January 02, 2010

    XL: 1st!

    We’ve missed hearing you say that.

    Welcome home.

    XL: Perhaps The Mistress might consider a convent?

    I’m having nun of that.

    NORMADESMOND: perhaps mistress should watch "lady sings the blues" as a primer?

    Oh but I LOVE white gardenias!

    DAMIEN: I'm thinking four permanent houseboys - 1 white boy, 1 Black man, 1 asian lad, 1 latin - with lots and lots of meaningless fantastic sex. And you never have to make a meal or wash a dish again - *Sigh* - thats how Id do it.

    You don’t really think Mistress MJ goes into the kitchen, do you?

    Although I once took a wrong turn in the hallway and ended up in the kitchen accidentally.

    SAVANNAH: ok, 4th place, i'll take it.

    You’ll take what you can get and LIKE it!

    JASON: Projecting ping pong balls from your secret lady place?
    though that's less of a "vice" than a "vocation"

    One step at a time.

    I’m teaching it how to smoke at the moment.

    CYBERPOOF: I'd mention Valium but I'm sure you're already dipping into those.
    Sex with strangers? You are probably already doing that too. Ménage a six (my French is, like my arse, not what it used to be)
    I like the ping pong ball suggestion.
    I'll be in my budoir trying out Damiens suggestion.
    By the way, you could try sex with little people (read. Politically incorrect midgets)

    Valium has no effect on me whatsoever.

    Why don’t you experiment with the midget sex and get back to us on that.

    IVD: Oh, Jason. You don't know MJ at all, do you. She'd never be able to do the ping pong ball trick what with being as slack as she is... She'd need something like a spacehopper.
    Yikes! I think I just channeled Piggy!
    Sorry about that, MJ. As for a vice - How about not ironing your clothes? Or leaving the top off the sauce bottle? Ooh! Or not rinsing the bath out once you've done?

    Oh THAT’S rich coming from someone whose back passage is so slack you could drive a bulldozer up it and still have room to park your motorcycle!

    I’m ignoring any suggestions you make as a result of your bad manners.

    KAPI: A new vice? How about...
    House Girls?!

    But can you imagine if they all had PMS at once?

    ROSES: I took up smoking last year.
    I'd definitely recommend it. One of the best supporters of sanity I've found. And you get to offend lots of people.
    Apart from that, I don't know what to suggest. After all, I pop on here for new ideas.

    Is that you in the second photo?

    PRINCESS: Dear Mistress
    I am astounded!
    I thaught you aready had an extensive knowledge and practice of all vices.
    Might I suggest Celibacy from all of them for 2010!
    Luv Princess XXX
    I'm sure that Mr Inexplicabe can suggest some thing... He is the master of "De Vice" after all.

    Mistress DOES have an extensive knowledge of vices but input from others and an exchange of ideas is always refreshing.

    Celibacy from vice is out of the question, I’m afraid.

    Oh, and I almost entitled this post “Inexplicable Vices”.

    EROS: Vice? Are you looking for a second in command? Or a clamping tool? I'm sure your houseboys can make use of both.
    Have you thought about clubbing a seal pup? Or a going on a whale hunt?

    I shall put your wobbly bits in a vice for even suggesting such a thing!

    ReplyDelete
  14. KAZ10:31 AM, January 02, 2010

    May I suggest idling?
    I can give you some help if you weaken.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Unknown11:36 AM, January 02, 2010

    Ooh, I just LOVE the idea of a new vice rather than resolutions!

    The challenge is to search and probe and find a vice you do not have, preferably one that is not outright criminal, as the paperwork for that would be just endless.

    Money laundering? Alternative porn? Pot? Cigarettes? Not sure. I am planning to swear more, blog more, and work less.

    Like the blog a lot, and thanks for finding mine. Will be back!

    ReplyDelete
  16. The Mistress11:47 AM, January 02, 2010

    KAZ: May I suggest idling?
    I can give you some help if you weaken.

    Shall I move in with you for a month and take notes?

    I’ve always wanted to visit Manchester.

    BRAHM: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    Ooh, I just LOVE the idea of a new vice rather than resolutions!
    The challenge is to search and probe and find a vice you do not have, preferably one that is not outright criminal, as the paperwork for that would be just endless.
    Money laundering? Alternative porn? Pot? Cigarettes? Not sure. I am planning to swear more, blog more, and work less.
    Like the blog a lot, and thanks for finding mine. Will be back!

    Thanks to Damien Oz for leading me to your blog.

    Did you know that Damien is Mr. Nude Infomaniac?

    Well Brahm, since we’re both in Canada, there should be no pesky border check problems if you’d like to be my “mule”.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ms Scarlet12:15 PM, January 02, 2010

    ...I'm at a loss to how you got a pic of me yesterday morning...

    Anyhow... how about bogey sculpture?
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  18. CyberPete5:33 PM, January 02, 2010

    No thank you. Midgets don't do it for me, sorry.

    As for Bingowings suggestion of clubbing seal pups, I'm all for killing animals for fashion. Fluffy white seal pup fur coats are fabulous!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ginro5:41 PM, January 02, 2010

    You on top for a nice change.

    ReplyDelete
  20. garfer6:41 PM, January 02, 2010

    How about group sex with ornithologists?

    I hear its all the rage in Saskatchewan.

    Get thee to a helicopter.

    ReplyDelete
  21. The Mistress7:11 PM, January 02, 2010

    SCARLET: ...I'm at a loss to how you got a pic of me yesterday morning...
    Anyhow... how about bogey sculpture?

    Oh for heaven’s sake, Miss Scarlet!

    CYBERPOOF: No thank you. Midgets don't do it for me, sorry.
    As for Bingowings suggestion of clubbing seal pups, I'm all for killing animals for fashion. Fluffy white seal pup fur coats are fabulous!

    Shuddup.

    LEODMAEG: You on top for a nice change.

    Normally we would welcome newcomers however I’ve a feeling we’re already acquainted?

    GARFY: How about group sex with ornithologists?
    I hear its all the rage in Saskatchewan.
    Get thee to a helicopter.

    What is it you call birdwatchers over there?

    ‘Twitchers’ isn’t it?

    I suppose they’ll want to see a pair of Great Tits?

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous9:26 PM, January 02, 2010

    Puzzles?

    ReplyDelete
  23. The Mistress9:41 PM, January 02, 2010

    MAGO: Puzzles?

    Funny you should mention puzzles as Mistress MJ enjoys doing the New York Times Sunday crossword.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Istvanski7:02 AM, January 04, 2010

    Well let's all pool our ideas, shall we?
    May I suggest a vice/requirement to feltch seal clubbing homosexual midgets after they've all eaten a Vindaloo?

    Failing that, you could get yourself hooked on Twitter...

    ReplyDelete
  25. The Mistress9:41 AM, January 04, 2010

    ISTVANSKI: Well let's all pool our ideas, shall we?
    May I suggest a vice/requirement to feltch seal clubbing homosexual midgets after they've all eaten a Vindaloo?
    Failing that, you could get yourself hooked on Twitter...

    You’re not on Twitter with Geoff, are you?

    ReplyDelete
  26. Istvanski6:11 PM, January 04, 2010

    Yes, but he's the only one from these blogging parts that I've linked to. I'm not on the public timeline thing so technically speaking that doesn't make to be too much of a weird techno geek. And, and, and...my tweets come straight from the myspace update status thing which comes from the technorati feed on the facebook forum thread that feeds through my YouTube channel fromy MSN spaces page which....

    ...zzzzzzzzzzzz

    ReplyDelete
  27. The Mistress6:16 PM, January 04, 2010

    ISTVANSKI: Yes, but he's the only one from these blogging parts that I've linked to. I'm not on the public timeline thing so technically speaking that doesn't make to be too much of a weird techno geek. And, and, and...my tweets come straight from the myspace update status thing which comes from the technorati feed on the facebook forum thread that feeds through my YouTube channel fromy MSN spaces page which....
    ...zzzzzzzzzzzz

    As a non-Tweeter, I dozed off after “technically speaking”.

    ReplyDelete

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