Thursday, June 06, 2013

What Actually Goes on Between Homosexuals

Tell us what you think actually goes on between homosexuals.


(click to enlarge)

Or discuss any of the articles in this 1974 Cosmo magazine.

28 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. What goes on between homosexuals? Umm....they bitch a lot and argue over who left the seat up and left the toothpaste on the sink?

      And the best angle to take the picture to send into Infomaniac for Fisting Friday.

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    2. ROSES: This pair must still be in the honeymoon phase.

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    3. Aww...they're so cute.

      Give it another 2 months...

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  2. What actually goes on between homosexuals? If the goings-on at the Villa Muscato are any indication, it's wild nights of terrier-grooming and the occasional bout of bickering about whether to watch old Egyptian movies or Modern Family. I always feel like we're a disappointment to the rabid right wing (and possibly to Helen Gurley Brown, too), what with the near-total lack of depravity...

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    1. MUSCATO: You’re livin’ the dream!

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  3. What actually goes on between homosexuals stays BETWEEN HOMOSEXUALS!

    But what actually happens between Mistress' boobs is world wide renowned.

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    1. HUGGY JON: Are you suggesting that I took the Cosmo Challenge?

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  4. As Muscato has already summed up my homosexualing, I shall instead comment on a Cosmo article. Specifically:
    "Advice to girls over five-feet-seven - Walk on your toes if you're wearing killer heels, or Get down off that ladder!

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    1. MR. DeVICE: A tall girl like you needs to lose those heels.

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  5. What actually goes on between homosexuals? Well in 1974 they probably dreamed about Robert Redford's rise, got "love" affairs in the fastest time with the fewest tears, did lost of happy things with themselves and enjoyed their man-holding years...

    Not much changes.

    Jx

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    Replies
    1. JON: Those “crucial man-holding years” keep getting younger and younger.

      What are they now?

      Between 15 and 21?

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  6. Dr. David Rueben, author of Everything You Wanted to Know About Sex* (*But were afraid to ask) did more to harm people by portraying Homosexuals as one step under the self loathing characters in the Boys in the Band) and in doing so helped to spur on the spread of HIV through anonymous encounters. For tens of thousands of gay men who came of sexual age between 1969 and the 1970s, his book was the first place we were able go to to get our questions answered. He predicted a life of loitering in bowling alley toilet stalls, dangerous encounters in public and worse. No one could have foreseen the HIV epidemic, but he spurred on young men to have quick, faceless contacts instead of healthy sexual encounters.

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    1. COOKIE: No wonder so many men are in therapy.

      Here is one particularly offensive passage from Dr. Reuben:

      The homosexual must constantly search for the one man, the one penis, the one experience, that will satisfy him.

      Tragically there is no possibility of satisfaction because the formula is wrong. One penis plus one penis equals nothing. There is no substitute for heterosex—penis and vagina.

      Disappointed, stubborn, discouraged, defiant, the homosexual keeps trying. He is the sexual Diogenes, always looking for the penis that pleases.

      That is the reason he must change partners endlessly. He tries each phallus in succession, then turns away remorsefully. “No, that’s not the one!” He is in a difficult position—condemned eternally to search after what does not exist—after what never existed.

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    2. Shame "the penis that pleases" never caught on as a slogan. Jx

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    3. JON: Why not have business cards printed up?

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    4. jon, if you could lay claim to that slogan, i say run with it.

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    5. But try not to trip over it!

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    6. My glass is half full...of vodka!

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  7. Dr Rueben... The queen Victoria of his day...
    Lesbians Don't exist? the man is obsessed with cock! which is not strictly a purely homosexual persuit....

    I loved the cosmo article about Mr Wilde and his stamp collecting exploits... what a hoot!

    Standing outside the post office mail boxes asking passers by for "The envelope please"

    The article on living happily with yourself however was poorly researched. There was not one mention of wanking...

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    1. PRINNY: Wanking research?

      There’s your next big project.

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    2. I'll get right on to it!

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  8. BITCHES: Here’s a video clip of April 1974’s Cosmo cover girl Kathy Speirs asking Joe Namath to cream his face…with Noxzema.

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  9. face-lift for the still young homosexuals.

    why didn't i think of that?

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    Replies
    1. Liberace thought of it first with Scott Thorson.

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