Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Queen Competition

It’s contest time again on Infomaniac!


"As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen!"


Tell us why YOU are the effing Queen and you can win the cocktail napkins, pictured above!

Yes, we know there are only 3 asterisks after the “f” but we like to think that the word “effing” is inferred.

Complete this sentence to win...

“As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because …”

Enter NOW, bitches!

26 comments:

  1. XL: Ahem.

    Please observe the instructions as follows:

    Complete this sentence to win...

    “As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because …”

    ReplyDelete
  2. because...
    as you can see, whatever I think makes perfect f*cking cents to me!

    ReplyDelete
  3. “As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because I‘m an effing man…”

    ReplyDelete
  4. As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because I effing said so.

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  5. Because...
    I'm Famous on the disco scene
    I'm Dance-floor royalty

    I salute you

    ReplyDelete
  6. Off with her effing head
    ***Beast regally wallops MJ with his sceptre***

    ReplyDelete
  7. "As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because its a little known fact that in Denmark Old Knudsen's maternal bloodlust line goes as far back to Olga the randy and since weemen can store eggs in their bodies for centuries her eggs were passed doon until Julie the tempted of the royal whiteline had them fertilised by Odin during a hailstorm and thus Old Knudsen was born but they needed a king to fight off King Cnute the cunt so they stitched on the huge penis of a passing peasant but Old Knudsen never forgot his inner Queen and besides last week I did eff the Queen over a wheelie bin."

    If this account is different from anything I've ever said just put it doon to security matters.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am the effing queen because I crawled through a lot of shit and chucked a lot of shit at people to get to the top !

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  9. Good Lord! It's like a Pride parade with all these queens coming out!

    *Takes off shirt to get free candy and beads*

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  10. Because... I am British, I have stiff lips, and I know how to placate a Corgi.
    Sx

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  11. As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because all you'll get out of me on Christmas Day is five minutes of shit.

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  12. BITCHES: I see that some of you are making the effort to declare yourselves Queen.

    You have until the end of the day to win the royal cocktail napkins.

    *narrows eyes and directs next comment at BEAST*…

    Then did she raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."

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  13. “As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen because I am a shortarse with ideas above my station.”

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  14. “As a matter of fact, I am the effing Queen because my ball sack is bigger than MJ's.”

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  15. "As a matter of fact, I am the effing Queen because You want me to."

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  16. I am the f-ing Queen of Chihuahuas.

    **do I win?**

    I didn't think so.

    ReplyDelete
  17. ... because Red Queen always wins (http://www.flickr.com/photos/redhandedpictures/1873862288/in/set-72157600761188596/).

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  18. BITCHES: *yawns, continues filing nails as entries pour in, and considers lobbing another Holy Hand Grenade at Beast*

    Oh, what’s this? A newcomer?...

    RED-HANDED: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    And thank you for your stunning image.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I say to people I'm a muppet when I fuck up. I did a Facebook quiz and it turns out that the muppet I am is actually Miss Piggy.

    "As a matter of fact I am the effing Queen, because as Miss Piggy, I am fabulous, sexy and put up with no shit from no body. And actually, I don't have to justify my fabulousness. I just am the effing Queen."

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  20. There is no bigger Queen than me.

    That's why.

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  21. I am the Queen of Tarts, so therefore I NEED napkins...
    Sx

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  22. BITCHES: As tempting as it is to drag this contest out for a few more hours, Mistress MJ is being called away and so she will publish the winner's name in a new post, momentarily.

    ReplyDelete