Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Happy Birthday, Beast!

Wednesday, May 20th is Beast's birthday.

We’ve hidden your gift, Beast...



Can anyone guess what it is?

Or where we’ve hidden it?
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50 comments:

  1. Piggy and Tazy7:23 PM, May 19, 2009

    Yay! First!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Piggy and Tazzy7:24 PM, May 19, 2009

    Fuck it - I meant Piggy and Tazzy!

    Yay! First and second!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Piggy and Tazzy7:26 PM, May 19, 2009

    I suppose I better wish the fat cunt a happy birthday while I'm here.

    Happy fucking Birthday.

    Is the present a whistle?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Piggy and Tazzy7:27 PM, May 19, 2009

    And where's the cake?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Piggy and Tazzy7:41 PM, May 19, 2009

    I want to see pics of Beast shoving the birthday cake candles down his japs eye.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Piggy and Tazzy7:42 PM, May 19, 2009

    Actually, no I don't want to see the pics.

    I just want there to be some.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Piggy and Tazzy7:43 PM, May 19, 2009

    *apologises to any passing Japs for any offence*

    ReplyDelete
  8. The Mistress8:12 PM, May 19, 2009

    PIGGY & TAZZY: Here’s Beast’s birthday cake!

    CLICK THE LINK, BEAST!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous9:24 PM, May 19, 2009

    well, MJ I have had all my shots, (except an ass shot)If I thought you were a woman I might just send you and ass shot, but I would have to hear your voice first and more pics of you. Hmmmm. Perhaps Bamatrav is a hockey mom in Thunderbay. Now would that not be interesting? xxxxooo

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous9:27 PM, May 19, 2009

    Actually, I am guessing that this is the real MJ. Or it could be me and my ass that you finally found.

    ReplyDelete
  11. The Mistress9:39 PM, May 19, 2009

    BAMATRAV: I think you’re actually a lesbian.

    But not the lipstick kind.

    The kind with ugly footwear.

    Therefore you’re not my type.

    Maybe if you get prettier shoes and start wearing makeup.

    And had the good manners to wish our Beast a happy birthday.

    p.s. I noticed in your photo on Heff’s blog that you have a big moose knuckle. Perhaps it’s really just giant camel toe.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous10:48 PM, May 19, 2009

    Good comback, I did not pick up on your birthday, Happy birthday bitch. Makeup, hmmm. maybe, just for you, shoes, another hmmmm, perhaps some stilletos, but then again, just for you. Many happy returns. I only like lipstick lezzies.

    ReplyDelete
  13. ayeM8y11:46 PM, May 19, 2009

    Happy Birthday Beast. I'm guessing the present is under the cushion that he's just about sniffed out.

    ReplyDelete
  14. The Mistress12:09 AM, May 20, 2009

    BAMATRAV: Good comback, I did not pick up on your birthday, Happy birthday bitch. Makeup, hmmm. maybe, just for you, shoes, another hmmmm, perhaps some stilletos, but then again, just for you. Many happy returns. I only like lipstick lezzies.

    It’s BEAST’S birthday.

    Get into these heels and work it for the camera, BamaTravette.

    I know you want to.




    AYEM8Y: Happy Birthday Beast. I'm guessing the present is under the cushion that he's just about sniffed out.

    *throws loose change behind couch cushions and asks Mean Dirty Pirate to strip off his trousersand find us a quarter*

    ReplyDelete
  15. CyberPete1:12 AM, May 20, 2009

    Happy birthday Beastie!

    I wonder what that mans wife would say. Personally I'd say throw out those knick knacks and get a new sofa.

    ReplyDelete
  16. CyberPete1:13 AM, May 20, 2009

    And for everyone's sake put on some damn clothes.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ponita in Real Life1:16 AM, May 20, 2009

    Happy Birthday, Beast! Is it bananas you've hidden up your bottom?

    ReplyDelete
  18. BEAST1:47 AM, May 20, 2009

    Awww thanks everyone .
    I am so touched I have been cake farted on my birthday.
    ***sprays Birthday cake with febreze***

    ReplyDelete
  19. Old Knudsen3:05 AM, May 20, 2009

    Now thats what I'm talkin about nice tiles.

    ReplyDelete
  20. EMikeGarcia4:02 AM, May 20, 2009

    I was gonna guess spare change and that guy was looking for it in the couch cushions...

    I guess I was wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Ms Scarlet4:06 AM, May 20, 2009

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR BEASTIE!!!
    Looks like he's lost his merkin down the back of the sofa AGAIN.
    A new Dyson crevice attachment should sort him out.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous5:23 AM, May 20, 2009

    Happy birthday Beast, and many to come. You are a man of distinction, style and patience: The Mistress should call herself happy that you come here!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Anonymous8:42 AM, May 20, 2009

    Happy Birthday Beast, love the thong!

    Wil Harrison.com

    ReplyDelete
  24. LẌ8:46 AM, May 20, 2009

    Searching Mistress MJ's sofa for a Loonie!

    Happy B-Day Beastie!

    ReplyDelete
  25. KAZ8:53 AM, May 20, 2009

    Happy Birthday lovely Beastie.
    Perhaps your present is a new jock strap as you've obviously lost weight since you bought that one.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Leah9:32 AM, May 20, 2009

    Happy Birthday Beast! It's not original, but it's heartfelt!

    xo

    ReplyDelete
  27. Heff9:44 AM, May 20, 2009

    Oh, what a surprise - an ass shot.

    Happy Birthday, Beast.

    ReplyDelete
  28. The Mistress10:04 AM, May 20, 2009

    CYBERPOOF: I wonder what that mans wife would say. Personally I'd say throw out those knick knacks and get a new sofa.

    What man?

    That’s BEAST!




    PONITA: Happy Birthday, Beast! Is it bananas you've hidden up your bottom?

    He’s graduated to pineapples.




    BEAST: Awww thanks everyone .
    I am so touched I have been cake farted on my birthday.
    ***sprays Birthday cake with febreze***

    Happy Birthday, Mr. PoopyPants!

    Let mummy change your nappy now.

    *sprays Beast liberally with Febreze*




    KNUDSEN: Now thats what I'm talkin about nice tiles.

    I’ve been nagging Beast for months to get rid of his nasty fireside rug.

    His inner interior decorator finally listened.

    ReplyDelete
  29. The Mistress10:04 AM, May 20, 2009

    MIKEY: I was gonna guess spare change and that guy was looking for it in the couch cushions...
    I guess I was wrong.

    You could throw a nickel in there and Beast would make a dive for it.

    Or anything sweet you might have in your pockets…

    Just throw it onto the couch and watch Beast go for it.




    SCARLET: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR BEASTIE!!!
    Looks like he's lost his merkin down the back of the sofa AGAIN.
    A new Dyson crevice attachment should sort him out.

    Let’s hope he doesn’t accidentally vacuum up his Lurex purple posing pouch.




    MAGO: Happy birthday Beast, and many to come. You are a man of distinction, style and patience: The Mistress should call herself happy that you come here!

    Beast is lucky I ALLOW him to come here!




    WIL: Happy Birthday Beast, love the thong!

    Wait ‘til you see BEAST in his Lurex purple posing pouch.

    If he hasn’t vacuumed it up yet with his new Dyson crevice attachment, that is.

    ReplyDelete
  30. The Mistress10:05 AM, May 20, 2009

    XL: Searching Mistress MJ's sofa for a Loonie!

    Or a Toonie if he’s lucky!





    KAZ: Happy Birthday lovely Beastie.
    Perhaps your present is a new jock strap as you've obviously lost weight since you bought that one.

    Who are you kidding, Kaz?

    He still has a fat arse.




    LEAH: Happy Birthday Beast! It's not original, but it's heartfelt!

    Try not to get emotionally attached.




    HEFF: Oh, what a surprise - an ass shot.
    Happy Birthday, Beast.

    When is the Heff’s birthday?

    Perhaps we can arrange some titty action for a change.

    Or just stick tassels on BamaTrav’s nipples.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Anonymous10:13 AM, May 20, 2009

    MJ, at night I am usually drunk and on Clonapin. So I miss who's birthday it is, hard to see or pay attention I should say. Anyway, heels to you.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Anonymous10:13 AM, May 20, 2009

    MJ, at night I am usually drunk and on Clonapin. So I miss who's birthday it is, hard to see or pay attention I should say. Anyway, heels to you.

    ReplyDelete
  33. The Mistress10:28 AM, May 20, 2009

    BAMATRAV: Judging by your duplicate comments, you're drunk right now!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Anonymous10:43 AM, May 20, 2009

    Not at this moment, but soon, soon. Face down ass up to the world. Peace.

    ReplyDelete
  35. MommyHeadache11:21 AM, May 20, 2009

    That's an easy one. A declawed hamster up the rectum. Happy Birthday Beast and remember hamsters need nuts!

    ReplyDelete
  36. The Mistress11:26 AM, May 20, 2009

    BAMATRAV: Tell Mistress MJ your birthdate and perhaps she will arrange to jump out of a cake.


    EMMA: That is a most disturbing image.

    We prefer to stick pineapples and other assorted fruits up Beast’s bottom, thank you very much.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Anonymous11:41 AM, May 20, 2009

    Only if you fart on it first.

    ReplyDelete
  38. BEAST11:58 AM, May 20, 2009

    Dont encourage the woman Bam Trav
    No confectionary will be safe

    ReplyDelete
  39. FirstNations, on hiatus12:11 PM, May 20, 2009

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEAST!


    1. Beast is really old;
    his beard is all white. Does the
    carpet match the drapes?

    2. Come down off that chair.
    Put your pants back on and please-
    NO NOT ON YOUR HEAD.

    3. Down by Boscombe Pier
    in ocean scented darkness,
    a present is wrapped.

    You are my baby Beastly Bud. Go forth and conquer, crowned with glory!!


    *runs off to consume half a boiled cabbage and purchase a cake*

    ReplyDelete
  40. The Mistress12:30 PM, May 20, 2009

    BAMATRAV: Only if you fart on it first.

    You filthy little bugger.

    Here ya go.

    And it’s not even your birthday!

    In exchange, I want you to wear guyliner.




    BEAST: Dont encourage the woman Bam Trav
    No confectionary will be safe

    Not even pudding!




    NATIONS: Yay! Ms. Nations is at the party!

    Beast is handing out posing pouches to everyone to wear on their heads as party hats.

    Please take one and help yourself to some cake.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Jenny12:36 PM, May 20, 2009

    Happy Birthday Beast!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  42. The Mistress12:38 PM, May 20, 2009

    BOXER: Are you wearing one his posing pouches on your head?

    Aren't they a fun idea for party hats?

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anonymous2:23 PM, May 20, 2009

    We got him a jockstrap? Doesn't he already have like 50 of those things?

    ReplyDelete
  44. Anonymous2:51 PM, May 20, 2009

    BTW, I saw this video and for some reason it reminded me of you. Enjoy!

    ReplyDelete
  45. The Mistress3:28 PM, May 20, 2009

    RANDOM: BTW, I saw this video and for some reason it reminded me of you. Enjoy!

    Those are the Infomaniac Dancers.

    Aren’t they groovy?

    ReplyDelete
  46. Anonymous3:43 PM, May 20, 2009

    I had a feeling you had something to do with that dance group.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Mark Sanderson4:04 PM, May 20, 2009

    Happy Birthday Beast.

    And thank you MJ, for the educatioanl video.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Mark Sanderson4:05 PM, May 20, 2009

    LOL. I mispelt educational.

    ReplyDelete
  49. The Mistress5:42 PM, May 20, 2009

    RANDOM: I had a feeling you had something to do with that dance group.

    They’ll be reprimanded for skimping on the clothing budget.




    EMERSON: Happy Birthday Beast.
    And thank you MJ, for the educatioanl video.
    LOL. I mispelt educational.

    Infomaniac is not just entertaining…

    It’s edumatational.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Istvanski7:31 AM, May 22, 2009

    Where did that big candle go?

    ReplyDelete

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