Sunday, February 22, 2009

Nervine

Don’t do anything today to get on Mistress MJ’s nerves until she’s had her “calmative” …




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47 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:56 PM, February 21, 2009

    1st.

    YAY!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous8:59 PM, February 21, 2009

    We should all follow the example of Mrs. Love of Wigger Street.

    And throw in what comes a way ...

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  3. The Mistress9:01 PM, February 21, 2009

    MAGO: Just because you won The Penis Book doesn’t mean you have to lord it over everyone else.

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  4. LẌ9:08 PM, February 21, 2009

    Apparently, having a face with bilateral symmetry isn't a requirement for appearing in Dr Miles' ads.

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  5. Anonymous9:09 PM, February 21, 2009

    I'm not afraid of you, tonic or no tonic.

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  6. Romeo Morningwood9:14 PM, February 21, 2009

    I hear that the Nervine in the vaginal applicator is selling like hotcakes!

    Is it just me or does Mrs. Cora Love look like Dick Cheney's Mom?

    ReplyDelete
  7. HoodChick9:23 PM, February 21, 2009

    9 bottles of each?! At one time? That broad had some issues. The only thing I can down in qualities of 9 are beers. That tends to settle me down too.

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  8. The Mistress9:32 PM, February 21, 2009

    XL: Apparently, having a face with bilateral symmetry isn't a requirement for appearing in Dr Miles' ads.

    You try keeping a straight face under pressure!

    MAXI: I'm not afraid of you, tonic or no tonic.

    But you’re afraid of Yer Ma, aren’t you?

    Yer lime green coat is getting on my last good nerve, by the way.

    DONN: I hear that the Nervine in the vaginal applicator is selling like hotcakes!

    You’re not a doctor. You just play one in the Blogosphere.

    What would Professor Wizenheimer have to say about this?

    HOODCHICK: 9 bottles of each?! At one time? That broad had some issues. The only thing I can down in qualities of 9 are beers. That tends to settle me down too.

    I’m only on my second glass of wine and I’m already settling down…a little.

    *adds another drop of Nervine*

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ponita in Real Life9:39 PM, February 21, 2009

    MJ, add some effervescent tablets to your wine and make it some bubbly!

    If you use the stuff with the vaginal applicator and then have sex, does your man settle down too?

    Inquiring minds want to know...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Romeo Morningwood9:42 PM, February 21, 2009

    One unusual side effect of ingesting copious amounts of Nervine is that women acquire a freakishly extended clitoris or nanophallus.

    Medical Practioners commonly refer to this condition as Hyena'd.

    The origin of this term is in dispute, some believe it is in reference to the fact female Hyenas have a nanophallus while others believe it was named after the first known patient, Cora Love's sister Enid.

    The only know cure for being Hyena'd is to ride a unicycle for several thousand miles.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ponita in Real Life10:05 PM, February 21, 2009

    @Donn: How extended is 'freakish'? We all come in different shapes and sizes, just like you guys do.

    :D

    ReplyDelete
  12. The Mistress10:22 PM, February 21, 2009

    PONITA: MJ, add some effervescent tablets to your wine and make it some bubbly!

    What fun!

    DONN: One unusual side effect of ingesting copious amounts of Nervine is that women acquire a freakishly extended clitoris or nanophallus.

    Medical Practioners commonly refer to this condition as Hyena'd.

    Do you hear me laughing like a hyena?

    No. You do NOT.

    By the way, Ponita is a nurse in real life.

    The only know cure for being Hyena'd is to ride a unicycle for several thousand miles.

    Lastly, please refrain from sniffing the seat of my unicycle.

    PONITA: @Donn: How extended is 'freakish'? We all come in different shapes and sizes, just like you guys do.

    Do you have a photo you’d like to share with us, Ponita?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Ponita in Real Life10:36 PM, February 21, 2009

    Nope. No photos. My wee willie is just that... wee and not freakish at all.

    Although I am sure there are a few out there in cyberland....

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  14. Old Knudsen2:58 AM, February 22, 2009

    My wee willy is freakish. One day he dug up all me flowers I had to inject nervine into me arm.

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  15. Daisy3:59 AM, February 22, 2009

    i need some of THAT shit! got any extra mj? seems everyone is getting on my last nerve, and JUMPING!

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  16. Geoff5:52 AM, February 22, 2009

    Nervine was first tested in the trenches in WW1. It was a cure for shell shock. Then they found out about the side effects and decided it was only suitable for housewives.

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  17. BEAST6:27 AM, February 22, 2009

    Oh shut up the lot of you , your all getting on my Nervine :-)

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  18. tony6:38 AM, February 22, 2009

    Oh What I'd Give To Feel The Way I Did in 1914...............

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  19. Leah9:16 AM, February 22, 2009

    I've got some New Formula Nervine at home. It's also called...well, never mind.

    @ tony: oh, me too.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Carnalis9:22 AM, February 22, 2009

    the world loves a passive woman.

    9 bottles?? peeing like a horse too, i imagine.

    ReplyDelete
  21. The Mistress9:37 AM, February 22, 2009

    PONITA: Nope. No photos. My wee willie is just that... wee and not freakish at all.

    You have a wee willie?

    There is surgery these days that can put you right.

    Does the name Christine Jorgensen mean anything to you?

    KNUDSEN: My wee willy is freakish. One day he dug up all me flowers I had to inject nervine into me arm.

    Nobody said life as a gurlyboy was going to be easy.

    DAISY: i need some of THAT shit! got any extra mj? seems everyone is getting on my last nerve, and JUMPING!

    You just need to get your nerve-laden arse over to Ireland and get yourself a big Mick.

    GEOFF: Nervine was first tested in the trenches in WW1. It was a cure for shell shock. Then they found out about the side effects and decided it was only suitable for housewives.

    Just like housework was deemed only suitable for housewives?

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Mistress9:38 AM, February 22, 2009

    BEAST: Oh shut up the lot of you, your all getting on my Nervine :-)

    Somebody didn’t have his banana for brekkie.

    TONY: Oh What I'd Give To Feel The Way I Did in 1914...............

    Would you settle for a feel of someone who was born in 1914?

    LEAH: I've got some New Formula Nervine at home. It's also called...well, never mind.

    We do not need to hear about your marital aids.

    CARNALIS: the world loves a passive woman.

    Suddenly I feel so unloved.

    9 bottles?? peeing like a horse too, i imagine.

    One beer is all it takes for me to be in and out of the ladies all night.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Anonymous10:28 AM, February 22, 2009

    Stop stomping that dainty feet please, it will take me hours to get it all right again ... ach

    ReplyDelete
  24. BEAST11:13 AM, February 22, 2009

    Stop stomping that dainty feet
    Dainty!!!
    PAH !
    If it wasnt for the lack of an adams apple , I would suspect a lady boy

    ReplyDelete
  25. Anonymous11:16 AM, February 22, 2009

    Hmm, now as you mention ...

    ReplyDelete
  26. LẌ11:29 AM, February 22, 2009

    Will Nervine be available at the next Infomaniac Staff Soirée?

    ReplyDelete
  27. The Mistress11:53 AM, February 22, 2009

    MAGO: Stop stomping that dainty feet please, it will take me hours to get it all right again ... ach

    All part of my cunning plan, Mago.

    BEAST: If it wasnt for the lack of an adams apple , I would suspect a lady boy

    That is just jealousy on your part as, since taking Nervine, my lady bits have become larger than your lady bits.

    MAGO: Hmm, now as you mention ...

    Mistress MJ does not like the way this conversation is turning.

    I shall withhold your Penis Book if this behaviour continues.

    XL: Will Nervine be available at the next Infomaniac Staff Soirée?

    Nervine will be piped through the ventilation system.

    ReplyDelete
  28. CyberPete2:46 PM, February 22, 2009

    Send the Penis book to me!

    ReplyDelete
  29. garfer3:07 PM, February 22, 2009

    I prefer horse tranquilliser.

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  30. INNER VOICES4:06 PM, February 22, 2009

    do they make the nervine in a suppository?

    ReplyDelete
  31. savannah4:21 PM, February 22, 2009

    personally, i think i need a penis! not for myself, of course...ok, yes! but not on me, ok? in me! wait, that's not coming out right...maybe i should just go back to . . .


    damndamndamn...



    xoxox

    ReplyDelete
  32. CyberPete4:27 PM, February 22, 2009

    As long as it goes in right who cares. Right Savannah?

    ReplyDelete
  33. Manuel6:16 PM, February 22, 2009

    gin does the same thing eh....

    ReplyDelete
  34. Ponita in Real Life6:16 PM, February 22, 2009

    Savannah, I second that motion.

    It's okay, girl.... we know what you meant.

    CyberPete understands too.

    ReplyDelete
  35. CyberPete6:41 PM, February 22, 2009

    I most certainly do Ponita.

    Bless

    ReplyDelete
  36. Anonymous8:29 PM, February 22, 2009

    Book snatching in earlier days was seen as crimen lasae majestatis ...

    ReplyDelete
  37. CyberPete9:01 PM, February 22, 2009

    I'll take my chances.

    Hand over the book Mago!

    ReplyDelete
  38. Jenny9:35 PM, February 22, 2009

    Last?????????????????????????????


    (sad, I know)

    ReplyDelete
  39. Anonymous9:58 PM, February 22, 2009

    It is still in the beautiful hands of the Mistress. She saied she would send it to Franconia.
    I trust the Mistress.

    (No way Pete!)

    ReplyDelete
  40. CyberPete10:13 PM, February 22, 2009

    That MJ is so cheeky!

    I want the book, she probably has a poo book she can send you Mago

    ReplyDelete
  41. Ponita in Real Life10:14 PM, February 22, 2009

    If you two are going to fight over that book, it has to be a nekkid wrestling match.

    Who wants front row tickets?!?!?

    ReplyDelete
  42. CyberPete10:35 PM, February 22, 2009

    I would settle for some penis, Ponita. Due to the lack of that the penis book is the next best thing

    ReplyDelete
  43. Ponita in Real Life10:44 PM, February 22, 2009

    I'd like some penis too, CP... not yours, though. ;-)

    (No offense intended, but I am pretty sure you don't want to give me yours anyway.)

    I do not want the book, however, so you still have to duke it out with Mago.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Anonymous10:45 PM, February 22, 2009

    Poo book?
    As in "Book of Shit"? You fell down yer Valentinos and hit your head?

    ReplyDelete
  45. The Mistress12:07 AM, February 23, 2009

    BITCHES: You’re ALL getting on my nerves!

    *injects Nervine between toes*

    The Penis Book is going to Mago whether the rest of you like it or not.

    Now shut up for five minutes so I can prepare the next post.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Anonymous12:11 AM, February 23, 2009

    ... I'm quiet ... tremblin' ...

    ReplyDelete
  47. Anonymous12:43 AM, February 23, 2009

    Or behind the ears, between fingers, any place.
    Ende.
    Bed.

    ReplyDelete

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