Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Awards Ceremony

Aren’t we all a bunch of swells?

Mistress MJ believes you all deserve awards.



Create an award for yourself this very minute.

Tell us the name of your award and why you deserve it.

Then sit back and wait for cheers. Or jeers.

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38 comments:

  1. LẌ10:32 PM, February 09, 2009

    1st!

    ReplyDelete
  2. LẌ10:38 PM, February 09, 2009

    The Pillow Fluffer Award. Known in the industry as The Fluffy.

    The Official Infomaniac Pillow Fluffer deserves it, doncha know.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Old Knudsen11:55 PM, February 09, 2009

    The greatest blogger in the world award.

    I deserve it because um I'm the greatest blogger in the world. I am also the:
    Most modest
    Most bestest looking
    Most funnier than Manuel
    Most truthful
    I have the largest penis in the blogasphere.

    I should also get:
    The Irish blog award for anything.
    Scottish blog awards for anything.
    An Oscar.
    A pair of golden globes.
    The blank cheque award from Crazy old man Gates.
    Best use of cunt in a blog.
    The what the fuck is yer problem award.
    Survived legal action and spam award.
    The kill all blogging banana eating gorilla spamming wankers award.
    The get off my lawn award.
    The I have not deleted my blog like a crazy fucker award.
    The crazy fucker award.
    The I shagged MJ and lived award.
    The I shagged FN and all I got was this STD award.
    The I invaded Leah's shaved Gaza strip award.
    The I called Mago a German award.
    The I have no blogger friends and don't know why award.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bretthead12:23 AM, February 10, 2009

    Damn. I had a bunch but this guy ^^ Knudsen already won them all. Shall I take the First to Notice the Gal on the Lower Right is Pretty Hot Award?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous1:51 AM, February 10, 2009

    Just give me the Stachanow ...

    ReplyDelete
  6. CyberPete2:03 AM, February 10, 2009

    I'd be alright not making one up and just getting an Oscar.

    Best actor of course

    ReplyDelete
  7. Jenny2:05 AM, February 10, 2009

    I am so not worthy.

    REALLY.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Inexplicable DeVice3:19 AM, February 10, 2009

    My award is the 'I Look Most Like Me' award. I think I should have retrospective wins for the past 34 years, too!

    * waits for adulation and glory *

    ReplyDelete
  9. cher3:31 AM, February 10, 2009

    My award is "The best mental tripper award." That's right.. I trip people mentally. I'm really really good at it.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ms Scarlet4:18 AM, February 10, 2009

    Erm... actually I'll just have a nice cup of tea and a hobnob...
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  11. KAZ4:23 AM, February 10, 2009

    I claim the Nobel Peace Prize. I've not thrown a wobbler for 24 hours.
    I'll share it with Christian Bale.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Cunning_Linguist7:36 AM, February 10, 2009

    I'd make up the anti-award-award because I don't really care for them, but the irony would choke a horse, wouldn't it?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Daisy7:43 AM, February 10, 2009

    after the past two weeks...i should get the dog whisperer award...

    ReplyDelete
  14. savannah7:48 AM, February 10, 2009

    miss congeniality also called the least likely to stab you in the back award. :)
    xoxox

    ReplyDelete
  15. Ponita in Real Life8:03 AM, February 10, 2009

    I don't need one, but I think Thunder should get one for Best Bottom in Giant Underpants EVER!!!! Any other bottom that is large enough to fit those would be much too scary.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Tickersoid9:56 AM, February 10, 2009

    I award myself the 'Errrr....' For the person most likely to walk into a room having forgotten why they went there in the fir....Where am I?

    ReplyDelete
  17. The Mistress10:04 AM, February 10, 2009

    XL: You’re the best fluffer in the business.

    And as I have a headache right now, I need you more than ever.

    KNUDSEN: Without a doubt, you are the Greatest Blogger in the World.

    However, your colostomy bag leaked all over the red carpet so I’m denying you access to my Golden Globes.

    And Manuel’s arse is bigger and hairier than yours so don’t expect any prizes in that department either.

    And while we’re on the topic, when are the next Knudsen Awards?

    AWKWARD: You followed Old Knudsen so you get to wipe his arse.

    Consider it a privilege.

    MAGO: What did you say?

    I’m too busy admiring Old Knudsen’s “I Called Mago a German” Award.

    ReplyDelete
  18. The Mistress10:05 AM, February 10, 2009

    CYBERPOOF: The only reason you want an Oscar is so you can wear a Vera Wang silk taffeta gown with a bottom flounce.

    BOXER: Are you trying to use reverse psychology?

    IVD: 34 years?

    Looks more like 40.

    The years have not been kind, have they?

    CHER: You are a trip.

    Period.

    SCARLET: No tea for you.

    Awkward’s been spiking it.

    ReplyDelete
  19. The Mistress10:06 AM, February 10, 2009

    KAZ: Amy Winehouse has dibs on your award too but I doubt she’ll make it another 24 hours.

    CUNNING: A horse in underpants?

    DAISY: To celebrate, go over to Anonymous Boxer’s blog and watch her latest “Mute Monday” video.

    SAVANNAH: The least likely to stab me, personally, in the back?

    *looks around suspiciously at other Infomaniac bitches*

    PONITA: The award should go to Thunder but have you seen the size of Manuel’s arse?

    Thunder has some serious competition.

    TICKERS: You also get the “Just a Bit Poofy” Award although there are a few other contenders in this group.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Ponita in Real Life10:17 AM, February 10, 2009

    Manuel's is close, but Thunder's is much hairier and in a nicer way. Probably a bit firmer too, as he is younger and gets lots of exercise.

    Although I have not groped Manuel's arse so I cannot say for certain...

    I have, however, patted and prodded Thunder's and even scratched it for him. He can't reach it, you know...

    ReplyDelete
  21. MommyHeadache11:55 AM, February 10, 2009

    I award myself The Cutest Helmet Award

    That might come as a surprise to some of you who think I am a lady. More lady boy I suppose!

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Mistress12:04 PM, February 10, 2009

    PONITA: Mistress MJ has been granted access on a one-grope-only basis to Manuel’s arse.

    Or as we affectionately refer to it…Manuel’s sweet sugarloaf.

    I’m holding off as long as possible to savour the anticipation.

    EMMA: Keep your alleged lady boy secret under your helmet.

    If Old Knudsen sniffs a gurlyboy, he’ll be all over you like a rash.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Old Knudsen12:09 PM, February 10, 2009

    I only give awards to those that deserve them. I've only seen cunts as of late.

    ReplyDelete
  24. The Mistress12:24 PM, February 10, 2009

    KNUDSEN: As I recall, the barter system was involved when you doled out my Knudsen Award.

    ReplyDelete
  25. The Mistress12:24 PM, February 10, 2009

    KNUDSEN: p.s. I still have the rash.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Anonymous1:52 PM, February 10, 2009

    OMG! I don't know what to say...first, I'd like to thank dog. Dog is my co-pilot, you know.

    ReplyDelete
  27. The Mistress1:59 PM, February 10, 2009

    RANDOM: Don’t you mean Gog?

    ReplyDelete
  28. Bretthead2:16 PM, February 10, 2009

    Pouring Scarlet more tea. MJ, want some?

    ReplyDelete
  29. Anonymous2:32 PM, February 10, 2009

    I would like the «Best knowledge about fashion history» Award.

    (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Poiret )

    he he he

    keep fabulous darling

    ReplyDelete
  30. Anonymous2:48 PM, February 10, 2009

    Gog is pretty silent recently ...
    I said: Pass that flucking bottle of Vodka please.

    ReplyDelete
  31. The Mistress2:59 PM, February 10, 2009

    AWKWARD: Your tea makes me go down the rabbit hole!

    FABULASTIC: Welcome to Infomaniac!

    I would like the «Best knowledge about fashion history» Award.

    You got it!

    I’ll bet you’re wearing one of Poiret’s kimono coats as we speak.

    Do cum again.

    MAGO: Perhaps Gog is displeased with Franconia.

    ReplyDelete
  32. garfer4:14 PM, February 10, 2009

    A years supply of teacakes and a case of malt whisky would suffice for me.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Manuel6:12 PM, February 10, 2009

    I was wondering why my ass was twitching so much today.......hmmmmm I refuse to award myself an award on the basis that some youtube posting lokk at the funny cat type prick will inevitably just steal it off me.....

    bitter? moi?

    ReplyDelete
  34. The Mistress6:21 PM, February 10, 2009

    GARFY: If I were you, I’d lay off the teacakes for awhile.

    *jiggles Garfer’s belly flab*

    MANUEL: Is your arse twitching?

    Allow me to steady your sweet sugarloaf!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Heff6:31 PM, February 10, 2009

    I deserve the "Gets drunk, but still makes it to work on time" award.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Romeo Morningwood6:54 PM, February 10, 2009

    Most Likely To Pose Nekked Award..
    but it would need to be tastefully done..like Burt Reynolds in Cosmo.

    ReplyDelete
  37. The Mistress7:54 PM, February 10, 2009

    HEFF: You deserve the day off for winning it, then.

    MR.MORNINGWOOD: I’ll be gentle with the staples.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Kapitano10:23 PM, February 10, 2009

    Can I have the "Doesn't really deserve an award but oh go on then if you insist" Award...?

    ReplyDelete

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