Telltale Tootsies

According to a new study, a woman’s feet reveal how she really feels about you.




Professor Geoff Beattie, a leading psychologist from the University of Manchester says ...

"Whilst people might know what their facial expression or hands might be imparting, they will often have no idea whether their feet are moving or the messages their feet are sending out. The secret language of feet can reveal a great deal about our personality, what we think of the person we're talking to and even our emotional and psychological state, they are a fascinating channel of non-verbal communication."





We’re going out on a limb here but we’d have to say that this woman really likes you … a lot.




And now over to the Infomaniac Research Team.

Do you agree with the findings?

And what about men? The research indicates that the rules do not apply to men, who reveal nothing about sexual attraction through their feet.

Your input is welcomed to round out this groundbreaking study.

Filthy Friday - Deck Your Balls Edition

Each Filthy Friday throughout the month of December, Infomaniac will present a festive Christmas scene to put you in the mood ...

Your First Gay Bar

Today's post was inspired by TJB’s comment on our Transsexual Truck Stop post, as follows:

"Actually, on my first visit to my very first gay bar, my ill-advised trip to the loo provided me with a sight not terribly unlike the one shown here"…





So tell us about your first visit to a gay bar.

Yes, that includes you straight fellas too. And you laydeez of whatever persuasion.

Cum Clean Day

It seems that some of you are confused about which Infomaniac bitches are men and which are women.

And we’re not dumb but we can’t understand
Why some of you talk like a woman
But walk like a man.

Which of you fellas likes to dress up in laydeez clothing?



Who’s gay? Who’s straight? Who’s bi? Who’s keeping their options open?

Yesterday our very own truck stop trollop Ayem8y asked …

Wouldn’t it be nice to have an “INFOMANIAC Cum Clean Day”
Where all the board members announce who they are and what they are, and of course just to cum.

What a fabulous idea, Ayem8y! Especially since you assumed our lovely lady KAZ is a man!

So over to you now, bitches.

Cum clean.

This is your chance to state your gender and, if you wish, your sexual preference.

Although remember …

Infomaniac is NOT a dating service.

Transsexual Truck Stop

Once you’ve made a wrong turn off the highway exit ramp, they’ll make sure you never find your way back …


(click to enlarge)

A word of warning.

No matter how backed up you are, don’t go in the ladies’ room! …

Perv of the Day

Welcome to another edition of Perv of the Day.

Infomaniac will, from time to time, seek out the perviest perverts and parade them pantless in front of you, the judge and jury.




THE PERV: David Truscott, 40, of of Redruth, Cornwall, England.

THE PLACE: A farm in Camborne, Cornwall.




THE PERVERSION: Manure fetish.

Truscott broke into a farm, covered himself in manure and was seen masturbating.

He climbed into the manure spreader vehicle - and was found wearing shiny red shorts, rubber gloves and playing in the slurry for "sexual reasons".

The court heard he’s regularly visited this farm for some five years.

The farmer first became suspicious that something odd was going on when he found a water trough filled with manure and tissues scattered around.

The farmer then saw the shape of what appeared to be someone’s bottom and two hand prints where manure had been piled up.

On one occasion a milking parlour had been entered and Truscott had stripped down to his underpants and climbed into a huge vat of manure.

Police who searched Truscott's home found 360 pairs of women's knickers and containers of liquid sludge and hard mud.

Truscott told the officers that he liked to sleep in women’s pyjamas.





THE PUNISHMENT: Charged with breaching the terms of a restraining order and jailed for 20 weeks.

Thanks to Yorkshire’s biggest poofs, Tazzy and Piggy for bringing this story to our attention.

The Poseidon Adventure

Join Mistress MJ as she spends the day reenacting The Poseidon Adventure. (1972 version).

I shall be playing the Shelley Winters role of Belle Rosen.


You see, Mr. Scott? In the water I'm a very skinny lady.


Choose your own character (you'll have to fight me for the Shelley Winters role) or select one of several Poseidon Adventure action figures to act out your part.

If you’re camera shy and would prefer to work behind the scenes, tell us how you would have rewritten the script or recast the film.

You’re the directors, darlings!



I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.
-- Shelley Winters

Dancing Queens

It seems that a few of you were put off your lunch by yesterday’s Filthy Friday photo. Miss Lulu LaBonne, for example, asked…

can we have some nice skipping fairies next please?

Even more exciting than skipping fairies, we've found some dancing fairies in the shape of the Infomaniac Dancers …




(click photos to see “Les Girls” in their best light)


We hope we’ve managed to make amends with our sensitive readers.

Filthy Friday – Wanksgiving Edition

This old feller seems to be enjoying his Thanksgiving turkey dinner …



We wonder if he ate the giblets as well as the neck?



Note: Thanks to Kapitano for bringing the word ‘Wanksgiving’ to our attention.

Yanks Giving Thanks

Our friends in the United States celebrate Thanksgiving today.



So let’s all pause to consider this question…

What are all of you ungrateful Infomaniac bitches thankful for?

Obviously you’re stalling for time so Mistress MJ will get the ball rolling with just a few thoughts …

Thankful when our friend BEAST bathes and puts on a clean pair of underpants.

Thankful that MS. NATIONS has returned from her lengthy blogging hiatus.

And thankful that so many of you have submitted photos of your ALLURING ARSES.

And you, bitches?

Housekeeping Houseboys

Mistress MJ hasn’t had time to supervise the houseboys and as a result, the housework isn’t being done properly.

Honestly, is this any way to polish the furniture? …


(click to enlarge)
[via]

Do you have any novel ways of doing your housework?

Crocs O-Dial

Mistress MJ has taken to her bed as a result of this …





Mistress MJ’s Official Pillow Fluffer and IT Consultant, XL, knows how much I detest Crocs.

Yet he had the audacity to bring the Crocs-O-Dial Universal Cell Phone Case to my attention.

Worse still…it’s being sold at Walmart!

And we all know what kind of people shop at Walmart! …



(click to enlarge)


Not only that but KAZ plans to buy me a Crocs O-Dial for Christmas!





Please excuse Mistress MJ as she pulls shut the curtains and reclines with a case of the vapors.

I don’t know how much more Crocs product I can take.

Cocksucker’s Mirror

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Infomaniac Declared “Silly”

Our Brits! Brits! Brits! post continues to attract anonymous commenters.

But rather than continue on with the “Brits” debate, let’s skip ahead to see what Anonymous (a woman this time) has to say about Infomaniac in general …


A nice blog, but sometimes a bit too silly in places.


We here at Infomaniac are at a loss to determine which parts of Infomaniac are “too silly”.

Opinions, anyone?

Geezer Smut

It seems we upset the equilibrium yesterday with this photo.

To assure you today that all is right with the Universe and that you’re on the right blog, allow us to present some good old-fashioned geezer smut …


I’ll gum you young fellers to death


Reactions to yesterday’s post showed bewilderment as we’ll outline here with a couple of quotes from Kevin and IVD.

waitaminute
youngerish guy, toned body, pleasant appendage.....filthy friday????
honey, what's this, what's going on, what's happening here!?
The page says infomaniac, but there's no grey haired geezer with skidmarks on his back jumping rope with a gentleman caller who has a goiter and a stomach-apron.
kevin confuse.
--Kevin


That's exactly what I was thinking, Kevin. Honestly, one returns from the depths of an airing cupboard to find that a wrong turning must have been taken because one is now in Bizarro World!
-Inexplicable DeVice (IVD)


We here at Infomaniac can only hope that we’ve rectified the situation to your satisfaction.

The Big Squat

Are you ready to do The Big Squat?

Assume the position, bitches …



November 19 is World Toilet Day.

The World Toilet Organization asks you to squat for one minute today to acknowledge the need for proper sanitation worldwide.

Participating in the Big Squat is simple. Simply squat for one minute in a highly visible location, and then have a plan to explain to anyone who notices WHY you're all squatting.

Squatting is actually a very healthy bathroom stance, but it's also a symbol of the problems in the developing world, where a lack of sanitation forces people to squat in fields, on train tracks, or in other open places. Open defecation is actually one of the worst problems facing the developing world.

Looks like our friend Piggy’s already got a head start! …


Click to enlarge to see that the sign says "There are more toilets further on"

Please do not leave the public facilities pebbledashed, as Piggy has done.

As for the rest of you…

Ready. Set. SQUAT!

Hump Day

It’s hump day.

Would it kill you bitches to show a little enthusiasm?


(click to enlarge, if you can be bothered)

Secrets

Mistress MJ is convinced that you’re all withholding information.



We know that each and every one of you has a secret to tell; a juicy little piece of gossip about one or more of your fellow Infomaniac bitches.

We’re certain that Piggy knows a secret about Beast who knows a secret about Mr. Frobisher who knows a secret about IVD who knows a secret about CyberPete who knows a secret about Eroswings who knows a secret about Kapitano and on and on and on.

So go on then.

Spill it, sistahs.

Note: Some discretion is advised! This is strictly tongue-in-cheek so please don’t dish on any blogger who has actually confided in you. We don’t want this to end in tears now, do we?

Brits! Brits! Brits!

Non-Brit Infomaniac readers, please bear with us.




It seems we’ve upset the applecart (well, one Welshman, anyway) by lumping all our UK readers under the heading “Brits”.



I object!


Here’s what our Welsh reader had to say …

All i am saying is that you used the word Brit without realing that it is insulting to those who are not English. It is only the English and the population of Northern Ireland who are truly British.

The United Kingdom has four seperate identities within it. Scotland is a seperate country from England. Wales has a seperate border from England, the ROI has a seperate border from Northern Ireland.
You continue to offend many people with your constant misuse of the word Brits.

END OF WELSHMAN'S STATEMENT.

RETURNING NOW TO MISTRESS MJ...

Let’s have a look at this Venn Diagram, shall we?



[via]


The British Isles = England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland.

The United Kingdom = England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland.

Great Britain = England, Scotland and Wales.

When I’m referring to people who live in Great Britain and/or the United Kingdom, I refer to them as “Brits”. (Although if I’m including anyone from the Emerald Isle, I’ll usually add “and the Irish” to clarify; regardless of whether they’re from the Republic of Ireland or Northern Ireland).

I do so to simplify matters as I need a label for you lot.

Perhaps it is not technically correct but I need a single word to sum you all up.

Just what do you people want to be called, anyway?

How am I, an ignorant Canuck, supposed to make sense of it all?

Infomaniac now opens this forum up for discussion.

Wisely, Mistress MJ is staying out of this and will observe from a distance whilst nursing a glass of the finest Irish whiskey and having her feet massaged by a willing Franconian. At the close of the day, I shall study your responses and hope to have learned more about the mysterious peoples I call the Brits.

*bitch slaps all of you in advance and sits back*


Please see to it that you resolve this issue immediately.

Stormy Weather

First order of business here on Infomaniac today is to take roll call following Saturday’s storm in the UK.

All present and accounted for?

According to one report, things got so bad that “Firefighters took down a "dangerous" kebab shop sign which had become dislodged by strong winds in Gravesend, Kent.”
*sniggers*

How did you weather the storm?



As for the rest of you, what’s your worst weather memory?

Note: Click both pics for full splendour.