Mistress MJ wearing the Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts…on her head
Yes, that’s Mistress MJ, pictured above, former Winner of The Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts.
Longtime Infomaniac bitches have seen The Shorts travel all over the world.
Remember when IVD wore them in Norwich, England?...
Or Eroswings in Texas?...
Now they’re in Denmark and CYBERPETE is holding THE FREAKIN’ GREEN ELF SHORTS CAPTION COMPETITION!
You want to win The Shorts, don’t you?
Then head on over to CYBERPETE’S blog NOW!
Contest begins today and ends on March 13th.
Are you new to Infomaniac and wondering what all the fuss is about over a pair of shorts?
Mistress MJ has painstakingly compiled The Definitive History of The Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts for your enlightment.
Now get over to CyberPete’s and WIN WIN WIN!
Note: No new post until Sunday when we’ll showcase The Women of Infomaniac.
first!!!!
ReplyDeleteok, now i can read the post, sugar ;) xoxo
ReplyDeleteTHIRD!! YAY FOR THIRD!!! YAY YAY YAY!!
ReplyDeleteor no wait, technically second. savannah already got a turn.
huh? shorts? wha?
Lazy bitch!
ReplyDeletefranconian bitch!!
ReplyDelete..wait, shorts...?
TITS!
ReplyDeletebaby! c'mere
ReplyDeleteBITCHES: Shouldn't you bitches be posting some creative captions over at CyberPoof's place instead of acting like fools over here?
ReplyDeleteOH. MY. GOD. Just just MADE my week!!! Those Freakin' Green Elf Shorts are MINE! MINE I SAY!!!
ReplyDeleteI was so excited I repeated "just" twice! I meant to say: You just MADE my week! I'm heading over to CyberPete's now...
ReplyDeleteIt's about time. How long has it been since they arrived?
ReplyDeleteRANDOM CHICK is hepped up on Nations' secret stash again.
ReplyDeleteBoxer, it has been A YEAR.
In the last pix, are the short on display on a certain notorious stinky duvet?
ReplyDeleteThanks dear!
ReplyDeleteYou are a gem.
Ah, yes! The return of the Shorts! Let's hope someone from South America, or Asia, or Oz joins in the fun! The Shorts have spent quite some time in North America and UK, and I don't think customs will let them back in!
ReplyDeleteThe shorts are an object of desire, and would look nice in my Smeg.
ReplyDeleteSx
XL: The Shorts have never (thankfully) girded the loins of Beast so no, that is NOT the stinky duvet.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: You are a gem.
Those words will come back to haunt you.
EROS: No one from Vatican City has won them yet either.
Mistress MJ would like to see a winner from the Isle of Man.
Imagine them trying to fit The Shorts over their three legs!
SCARLET: Last time we spoke with you, Miss Scarlet, you were licking your Smeg.
Re the absence of the shorts: I always figured they got lost down Rack Canyon there in the first picture. Cyber musta went down there with a muletrain and fetched 'em out. Brave man. brave, foolish man.
ReplyDelete*shakes head sadly*
I am indeed foolish FN.
ReplyDeleteI thought about tossing them back down again but alas it was too late..
NATIONS & CYBERPOOF: Mistress MJ is not amused.
ReplyDeleteI had totally forgotten about IVD's glow in the dark legs
ReplyDelete***chortles***
BEAST: Do you suppose IVD made sure his new lover was completely smitten with him before he revealed his glow-in-the-dark legs?
ReplyDeleteI don't understand why anyone would want the shorts. If Old Knudsen's had his mitts on them I don't want to think what kind of substances are soaked into them. In any case, do the shorts have magic powers like do they make you grow gigantic breast like Jack and the Giant Beanstalk, not magic beans but magic shorts?
ReplyDeleteThe Shorts have yet to receive stainage from Old Knudsen as he hasn’t been a lucky winner yet.
ReplyDeleteSo if you win them, you won’t have the pleasure of rubbing up against his DNA.
The Shorts will make you grown an enormous ween. I keep having to tuck mine back into my panties.
"Grow" that is, not grown.
ReplyDeleteOr did I mean GROAN?
Maybe he is hypnotised by the affor mentioned neon legs rather than smitten. Much like a moth to a flame
ReplyDeleteBEAST: I think it is more likely that IVD put a spell on him.
ReplyDeleteSome sort of love potion.
How else could you possibly explain it?!
But what would I do with the extra sausage? Roast it and put it in a bun?
ReplyDeleteA trick pelvis perhaps ???
ReplyDeleteEMMA: Feed it to Beast?
ReplyDeleteBEAST: A trick pelvis?
Like his freakishly bendy thumbs?
heh heh...
ReplyDeleteVOICES: I can't imagine what would happen to The Shorts should they fall into YOUR hands.
ReplyDeleteI don't want the shorts. I'm just saying hello.
ReplyDeleteGEOFF: You're too busy Twittering to enter compos.
ReplyDeleteI knew it would come to this.
I'm surprised you could find the time to drop in and say hello.
How could you not want the shorts Geoff?
ReplyDeleteI'm shocked to my very foundation.
CYBERPOOF: To your foundation garments, more like.
ReplyDeleteNOTE TO THE BITCH WHO EMAILED ASKING IF I PHOTOSHOPPED THOSE TITS IN:
ReplyDeleteThose are Mistress MJ's actual REAL breasts!
The nerve of some people!
*thwacks everyone in the head alternating left and right boobies*
The gnome, however, was added as an afterthought.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletehmmmmm maybe I will
ReplyDeletenow
show us yer desk.......oooh come on now missus show us yer desk....you owe me!!!
http://desked.wordpress.com/
LEAH: First you won The Penis Book.
ReplyDeleteThen you won the Valium piggybank.
You could have been three times lucky!
MANUEL: Are you still pimping out your desk blog?
I’m afraid that unlike you, I do not have any tubes of Chef’s Arse ointment on my desk nor soggy old tea bags.
How about I show you the toe of my boot instead just before I insert it up yer arse?
However, I would like to see how that big Irish arse fills out a pair of Elf Shorts.
Yer toe?
ReplyDeleteYES!
...had to neurotically erase...
ReplyDeletecyberPete deserves a 'Most Artistic Freakin' Green Evidence of Shorts Wearage' prize or something.
ReplyDeletemaybe 'Most Amazing Blue Glitterage on the Maxipad Next To Freakin' Pink Pumps' award.
some kind of award, anyway. Shit, I'm drunk, I dunno, give the man an award and quit buggin' me. And put them pancakes away, cheezer.
*pummels mj into cheeze scented submission with superior boobage*
MAGO: Knock yourself out.
ReplyDeleteLEAH: When are you going to write a review of The Penis Book?
NATIONS: Your gargantuan gazongas are without a doubt the most humongous hooters of all of The Women of Infomaniac but they are in no way superior to my fine display of Kalama-zoo-zoo-zoos.
So take your Great Wobblin' Wazoobies back to Whatcom County and don’t come back ‘til you’ve contained those mambazos in an industrial strength foundation garment.
I don't want the shorts, when two lots of crabs get together they fight and they are itchy enough with the parties.
ReplyDeleteHahaha FN! Thanks!
ReplyDeleteDrunks and kids speak the truth they say.
MJ--good idea, will do this weekend.
ReplyDeleteHow did our comment lounge degenerate into a big old pile of flapping mammaries , still makes a change from the usual filthy Friday saggy old man moob fest
ReplyDeletePlease tell that you have no intention of twittering with Geoff.
ReplyDeleteYou don't get breasts on twitter do you?
KNUDSEN: Pass the crab dip.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Having The Shorts in your possession for a year is award enough.
LEAH: It will look good on your CV along with that imaginary dissertation of yours.
BEAST: Makes a change from the festering fruit basket that is your backside.
KAZ: Geoff has gone to the other side with Twitter.
I don’t recognize him as the same man anymore.
Do you think we should stage an intervention?
Twitter is awesome.
ReplyDeleteIt displays HUGE cryptic numbers telling you when you've used up 140 characters like I just did.
Come to the dark side MJ!
free your mind and your ass will follow.
Twitter is Blu-ray
ReplyDeleteFacebook is Casette
Blogging is 8-Track
E-mail is 78rpm
Just sayin' is all.
It's not a year yet is it?
ReplyDeleteOh gosh!
DONN: Stars on 45!
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Your acting all innocent doesn't wash with me.
twitter is the devil.
ReplyDeleteI think Mr Coppens would look good as an Elf... and he has a green bathroom.. and a long nose.
ReplyDeleteYes... I have totally forgotten what I was going to say...
Sx
I just joined 'Twatter' cos I'm no a twit. Are those yer real tits? how cum when I had you you were flat chested and covered in tattoos? Its Friday where is the filth?
ReplyDeleteSAVANNAH: You know what they say in the song…
ReplyDelete“The Devil went down to Georgia.”
Beware!
SCARLET: I try not to get too close to Mr. Coppens for fear of impaling myself on his long nose!
KNUDSEN: You had me from behind.
Didn’t you notice?
Now had you turned me around…
I'm still the same man. I just can't access your blog at work! I gave Kaz one today!
ReplyDelete@ FirstNation's "put them pancakes away"
ReplyDeleteMistress, FN slipped this past Infomaniac Security!
GEOFF: I gave Kaz one today!
ReplyDeleteYou gave Kaz a what, Geoff?
XL: That’s what I get for giving Security the night off!
You know. One of those comment things.
ReplyDeleteGEOFF: You’ve lost me, Geoff.
ReplyDeleteAre you speaking in Twitterese?
I suppose you’re on Facebook and all?
Oh gosh! That's right, you don't wash.
ReplyDeleteMy mistake.
Geoff did give me a comment - it was well below the 140 characters - so perhaps it was a twitter.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Shall I point out the stain I left for you on The Shorts?
ReplyDeleteKAZ: It seems they're all atwitter over Twitter over at Geoff's today.
Hallo, it's International Women's Day - were are all these Women of Infomaniac, all' die duftenden kraftvollen Schönheiten - ach ... ?!
ReplyDeleteMAGO: Keep your trousers on.
ReplyDeleteI’m working on it.