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Friday, November 25, 2011
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Thanksgiving Gay
Happy Thanksgiving Gay, er Day, to all our American Infomaniac Bitches!
[via]
And thanks to the ever fabulous THOMBEAU, we have a little quiz to take today.
Check to see if you meet any of the qualifications listed below OR …
Why not make up your OWN gay quiz?!
The following passage is taken from Marilyn Manson’s autobiography, “The Long Hard Road Out of Hell.”…
My philosophy about sexuality is that I don't have a problem with anything anyone does in any way. All I ask is that you know the rules. I've sucked the dicks of several men, which a lot of straight guys won't admit to having done or wanting to do. But just like kissing a girl can't get her pregnant, sucking a guy's dick doesn't make you gay (Unless you break rule #3). It's not that i'm against being gay - I just want to clarify what makes you gay. Please note this list only pertains to guys: All women are by nature lesbians. So let's get things straight (no pun intended) - if you meet any of the qualifications below, you are gay.
1. IF YOU GET SOMEONE ELSE'S SPERM ON YOU.
2. IF YOU'VE EVER OWNED A SMITHS ALBUM.
3. IF YOU GET HARD WHILE SUCKING ANOTHER GUY'S DICK. IF YOU DON'T, YOU'RE STRAIGHT - UNLESS HE GETS SPERM ON YOU.
4. IF MICHAEL STIPE IS IN THE ROOM WITH YOU AND YOU'RE HAVING SEX WITH A WOMAN, YOU'RE BISEXUAL.
5. IF YOU'RE AT A GAY BAR, YOU'RE NOT GAY. BUT IF YOU'RE AT A STRAIGHT BAR AND YOU TALK TO ANOTHER GUY LONGER THAN YOU TALK TO A GIRL, YOU'RE GAY.
6. IF YOU TAP YOUR FEET TO A SMITHS SONG.
7. IF YOU DISCUSS ART FOR MORE THAN 45 MINUTES.
8. IF YOU'VE EVER WORN A BERET.
9. IF YOU KISS A GUY AND HE HAS A HARD-ON, YOU'RE NOT GAY UNLESS YOU HAVE A HARD-ON TOO.
10. IF YOU HAVE ANY KIND OF SEX - WITH A MALE OR A FEMALE - TO THE SMITHS, YOU'RE GAY.
11. IF YOUR ONLY PURPOSE IN LIFE IS TO GET GIRLS PREGNANT SO THEY CAN HAVE MORE GIRLS TO HAVE LESBIAN SEX TOGETHER.
12. IF YOU JACK OFF AND GET CUM ON YOURSELF.
13. IF YOU GET A BONER WATCHING GILLIGAN'S ISLAND.
14. IF YOU DON'T GET A BONER WATCHING BEWITCHED.
15. IF THERE'S A SMITHS SONG ON IN A BAR AND YOU'RE IN THE BATHROOM WITH YOUR DICK IN YOUR HAND.
16. IF YOUR NAME IS RICHARD AND YOU GO BY DICK.
17. IF YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH ANYONE NAMED DICK.
18. IF YOU DON'T CHEAT ON YOUR WIFE, YOU'RE ONLY USING HER AS A PROP TO MAKE PEOPLE THINK YOU'RE NOT GAY.
19. IF YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH A MODEL.
20. IF YOU FUCK A GIRL WHO LIKES THE SMITHS.
21. IF YOU DON'T EAT MEAT BECAUSE THE SMITHS ALBUM MEAT IS MURDER HAD AN IMPACT ON YOUR LIFE.
22. IF YOU DO ANYTHING SPIRITUAL.
23. IF YOU FUCK A PREGNANT WOMAN AND SHE'S CARRYING A BOY, YOU'RE GAY. IF YOU GET SPERM ON THE AMNIOTIC SAC, THE BABY WILL GROW UP TO BE GAY TOO.
24. IF YOU'VE EVER HAD A HAIRCUT LIKE MORRISSEY.
25. IF YOU'VE EVER HAS A HAIRCUT WHILE A MORRISSEY OR SMITHS ALBUM WAS PLAYING IN THE ROOM.
26. IF YOU'VE EVER TALKED ABOUT OF OWNED A CRYSTAL - ESPECIALLY IF IT'S CRYSTAL METH.
27. IF YOU'VE EVER PUT BAND AIDS ON YOUR NIPPLES AS A FASHION STATEMENT.
28. IF YOU'VE EVER SPENT MORE THAN A WEEK ON SOUTH BEACH.
29. IF YOU'RE NOT THINKING ABOUT TITS RIGHT NOW.
30. IF YOU STILL LIKED JUDAS PRIEST AFTER YOU HEARD THE RUMOUR THAT ROB HALFORD WAS GAY.
31. IF YOU GET A HARD-ON WHILE TAKING A SHIT.
32. IF YOU KNOW WHAT SPERM TASTES LIKE (ESPECIALLY IF IT'S YOUR OWN).
33. IF YOU KISS A GIRL WITH TONGUE AFTER SHE'S SWALLOWED YOUR CUM.
34. IF YOU GET HARD WHILE READING THIS.
35. IF YOU KNOW THE NAMES OF ANYONE WHO'S EVER BEEN IN THE SMITHS BESIDES MORRISSEY OR JOHNNY MARR.
36. IF YOU'RE A MALE MODEL.
37. IF YOU GET CHOKED UP LISTENING TO BOYS DON'T CRY BY THE CURE.
38. IF YOU'RE A CLOTHING DESIGNER.
39. IF YOUR FIRST, LAST, OR MIDDLE OR ONLY NAME IS MORRISSEY.
That’s it, Bitches!
According to MM, I’m a lesbian so I won’t bother taking the test.
*grabs Ms. Nations by the drumstick and slathers her in cranberry sauce*
And thanks to the ever fabulous THOMBEAU, we have a little quiz to take today.
Check to see if you meet any of the qualifications listed below OR …
Why not make up your OWN gay quiz?!
The following passage is taken from Marilyn Manson’s autobiography, “The Long Hard Road Out of Hell.”…
My philosophy about sexuality is that I don't have a problem with anything anyone does in any way. All I ask is that you know the rules. I've sucked the dicks of several men, which a lot of straight guys won't admit to having done or wanting to do. But just like kissing a girl can't get her pregnant, sucking a guy's dick doesn't make you gay (Unless you break rule #3). It's not that i'm against being gay - I just want to clarify what makes you gay. Please note this list only pertains to guys: All women are by nature lesbians. So let's get things straight (no pun intended) - if you meet any of the qualifications below, you are gay.
1. IF YOU GET SOMEONE ELSE'S SPERM ON YOU.
2. IF YOU'VE EVER OWNED A SMITHS ALBUM.
3. IF YOU GET HARD WHILE SUCKING ANOTHER GUY'S DICK. IF YOU DON'T, YOU'RE STRAIGHT - UNLESS HE GETS SPERM ON YOU.
4. IF MICHAEL STIPE IS IN THE ROOM WITH YOU AND YOU'RE HAVING SEX WITH A WOMAN, YOU'RE BISEXUAL.
5. IF YOU'RE AT A GAY BAR, YOU'RE NOT GAY. BUT IF YOU'RE AT A STRAIGHT BAR AND YOU TALK TO ANOTHER GUY LONGER THAN YOU TALK TO A GIRL, YOU'RE GAY.
6. IF YOU TAP YOUR FEET TO A SMITHS SONG.
7. IF YOU DISCUSS ART FOR MORE THAN 45 MINUTES.
8. IF YOU'VE EVER WORN A BERET.
9. IF YOU KISS A GUY AND HE HAS A HARD-ON, YOU'RE NOT GAY UNLESS YOU HAVE A HARD-ON TOO.
10. IF YOU HAVE ANY KIND OF SEX - WITH A MALE OR A FEMALE - TO THE SMITHS, YOU'RE GAY.
11. IF YOUR ONLY PURPOSE IN LIFE IS TO GET GIRLS PREGNANT SO THEY CAN HAVE MORE GIRLS TO HAVE LESBIAN SEX TOGETHER.
12. IF YOU JACK OFF AND GET CUM ON YOURSELF.
13. IF YOU GET A BONER WATCHING GILLIGAN'S ISLAND.
14. IF YOU DON'T GET A BONER WATCHING BEWITCHED.
15. IF THERE'S A SMITHS SONG ON IN A BAR AND YOU'RE IN THE BATHROOM WITH YOUR DICK IN YOUR HAND.
16. IF YOUR NAME IS RICHARD AND YOU GO BY DICK.
17. IF YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH ANYONE NAMED DICK.
18. IF YOU DON'T CHEAT ON YOUR WIFE, YOU'RE ONLY USING HER AS A PROP TO MAKE PEOPLE THINK YOU'RE NOT GAY.
19. IF YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH A MODEL.
20. IF YOU FUCK A GIRL WHO LIKES THE SMITHS.
21. IF YOU DON'T EAT MEAT BECAUSE THE SMITHS ALBUM MEAT IS MURDER HAD AN IMPACT ON YOUR LIFE.
22. IF YOU DO ANYTHING SPIRITUAL.
23. IF YOU FUCK A PREGNANT WOMAN AND SHE'S CARRYING A BOY, YOU'RE GAY. IF YOU GET SPERM ON THE AMNIOTIC SAC, THE BABY WILL GROW UP TO BE GAY TOO.
24. IF YOU'VE EVER HAD A HAIRCUT LIKE MORRISSEY.
25. IF YOU'VE EVER HAS A HAIRCUT WHILE A MORRISSEY OR SMITHS ALBUM WAS PLAYING IN THE ROOM.
26. IF YOU'VE EVER TALKED ABOUT OF OWNED A CRYSTAL - ESPECIALLY IF IT'S CRYSTAL METH.
27. IF YOU'VE EVER PUT BAND AIDS ON YOUR NIPPLES AS A FASHION STATEMENT.
28. IF YOU'VE EVER SPENT MORE THAN A WEEK ON SOUTH BEACH.
29. IF YOU'RE NOT THINKING ABOUT TITS RIGHT NOW.
30. IF YOU STILL LIKED JUDAS PRIEST AFTER YOU HEARD THE RUMOUR THAT ROB HALFORD WAS GAY.
31. IF YOU GET A HARD-ON WHILE TAKING A SHIT.
32. IF YOU KNOW WHAT SPERM TASTES LIKE (ESPECIALLY IF IT'S YOUR OWN).
33. IF YOU KISS A GIRL WITH TONGUE AFTER SHE'S SWALLOWED YOUR CUM.
34. IF YOU GET HARD WHILE READING THIS.
35. IF YOU KNOW THE NAMES OF ANYONE WHO'S EVER BEEN IN THE SMITHS BESIDES MORRISSEY OR JOHNNY MARR.
36. IF YOU'RE A MALE MODEL.
37. IF YOU GET CHOKED UP LISTENING TO BOYS DON'T CRY BY THE CURE.
38. IF YOU'RE A CLOTHING DESIGNER.
39. IF YOUR FIRST, LAST, OR MIDDLE OR ONLY NAME IS MORRISSEY.
That’s it, Bitches!
According to MM, I’m a lesbian so I won’t bother taking the test.
*grabs Ms. Nations by the drumstick and slathers her in cranberry sauce*
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Balls
Speaking of cocks in frocks, it takes balls for a boy to wear a skirt to school but that’s exactly what happened in England.
A 13-year-old boy wore his sister’s black skirt to class. He was later shortlisted for a human rights prize for taking a stand against a rule which allowed girls to change into skirts during hot weather, while boys had to swelter in long trousers.
Now if only we could lift the ball ban on Canadian playgrounds.
A 13-year-old boy wore his sister’s black skirt to class. He was later shortlisted for a human rights prize for taking a stand against a rule which allowed girls to change into skirts during hot weather, while boys had to swelter in long trousers.
Now if only we could lift the ball ban on Canadian playgrounds.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
Junk in the Trunk
You too can achieve this “ghetto booty” look simply by injecting a mixture of "cement, 'Fix-a-Flat,' mineral oil and super glue" into your arse…
Oneal Ron Morris, a fake doctor in Florida, has been arrested for allegedly giving women bad buttock injections.
“Morris, who police say is a man but appears to look like a woman and sports an apparently enhanced rear herself in arrest photos, was being held on $7,500 bond. It was unknown whether she has an attorney.”
If you want a bigger booty, the Infomaniac Medical Clinic recommends just eating a lot of ice cream rather than injecting your arse full of poison.
Read more here.
Oneal Ron Morris, a fake doctor in Florida, has been arrested for allegedly giving women bad buttock injections.
“Morris, who police say is a man but appears to look like a woman and sports an apparently enhanced rear herself in arrest photos, was being held on $7,500 bond. It was unknown whether she has an attorney.”
If you want a bigger booty, the Infomaniac Medical Clinic recommends just eating a lot of ice cream rather than injecting your arse full of poison.
Read more here.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Gifts for the Games Room
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Pull Up a Chair
While you're waiting for Mistress MJ to return, pull up a chair...
[via]
One of a kind...only one chair in stock.
Available at the Infomaniac Thrift Shop.
One of a kind...only one chair in stock.
Available at the Infomaniac Thrift Shop.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Gone Shopping
[via]
Back on Sunday.
In the meantime, based on the illustration above, try to identify the objects Mistress MJ is purchasing.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
Pill Party!
*sung to the tune of White Rabbit*...
♫One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones Mistress MJ gives you
Make you say Oh fuck it all♫...
♫Go ask Wally
When he's swallowed a DOLL♫...
In celebration of Designing Wally’s birthday, Mistress MJ is hosting a pill party!
Grab a handful at the door!
Von LX is on hand to fluff your PILLows...
You can keep your socks on...
But try not to lose your head!...
BOING!!!...
The house blend...
YAY! HAPPY PILLS!...
Reach into the jars and enjoy, Bitches!...
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Alcoholic Test
Bitches, please humour Mistress MJ by taking one more test of her new monitor.
Observe the photo below…
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Can you clearly read the text without squinting? (A reminder to Mr. Peenee and Normadesmond to put on their reading glasses.)
Is the entire photo visible without clicking to enlarge?
Can you see the image labelled “Started drinking 20” straight across to the image labelled “Loss of control 42 years of age” without clicking on it to enlarge? Or is a portion of the photo cut off?
Thank you for your assistance.
Regular programming will resume later today.
Observe the photo below…
Can you clearly read the text without squinting? (A reminder to Mr. Peenee and Normadesmond to put on their reading glasses.)
Is the entire photo visible without clicking to enlarge?
Can you see the image labelled “Started drinking 20” straight across to the image labelled “Loss of control 42 years of age” without clicking on it to enlarge? Or is a portion of the photo cut off?
Thank you for your assistance.
Regular programming will resume later today.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Happy Hour Test
Mistress MJ requires your assistance.
Observe the photo below…
Can you read the print on the image without clicking to enlarge the photo? i.e. the part that says, “Happy Hour Mixology. 44 Drink Recipes.”
Also, can you see the images of the astrological signs on the left and right columns of the photo or do you have to click to enlarge to see them? Is either the right column or the left column cut off so that you can’t see all the astrological signs?
You see, I’m using a larger computer monitor now which makes all my photos look big…just the way I’ve always wanted them!
No longer do I have to “click to enlarge” after I’ve posted to see the details in my photos.
But the question is … do YOU have to click to enlarge to see my photos clearly now?
p.s. I’ll catch up with all of you asap. The flu took the wind out of my sails.
Observe the photo below…
Can you read the print on the image without clicking to enlarge the photo? i.e. the part that says, “Happy Hour Mixology. 44 Drink Recipes.”
Also, can you see the images of the astrological signs on the left and right columns of the photo or do you have to click to enlarge to see them? Is either the right column or the left column cut off so that you can’t see all the astrological signs?
You see, I’m using a larger computer monitor now which makes all my photos look big…just the way I’ve always wanted them!
No longer do I have to “click to enlarge” after I’ve posted to see the details in my photos.
But the question is … do YOU have to click to enlarge to see my photos clearly now?
p.s. I’ll catch up with all of you asap. The flu took the wind out of my sails.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Wednesday, November 09, 2011
WINNER of the Gayest Thing in Your House Contest!
Mistress MJ asked…
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who’s the gayest one of all?
Congratulations to our winner THOMBEAU who wowed us with his Gay Monopoly game…
What they’re saying about Thombeau…
I would KILL for Thombeau's Gay Monopoly.
- NurseMyra
Can I play Gay Monopoly with Nursemyra's son????
- Jon (Deep Blue)
Thom's gay "man"opoly is too wonderful. But how could anyone play? They'd all be busy screaming over those playing pieces!
- Normadesmond
And now our runners-up:
For any reason, if Thombeau cannot fullfill his duties during his reign as The Gayest One of All, the first runner-up will take over his place.
That man is MR. PEENEE with his combination linen closet/Barbie doll sex club!...
And congratulations are in order for our second runner-up; Canada’s own RILEY and his Barbra Streisand doll!...
A big round of applause for all our contestants!
Thanks for participating in our The Gayest Thing in Your House Contest.
YOU’RE ALL FABULOUS!!!
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who’s the gayest one of all?
Congratulations to our winner THOMBEAU who wowed us with his Gay Monopoly game…
What they’re saying about Thombeau…
I would KILL for Thombeau's Gay Monopoly.
- NurseMyra
Can I play Gay Monopoly with Nursemyra's son????
- Jon (Deep Blue)
Thom's gay "man"opoly is too wonderful. But how could anyone play? They'd all be busy screaming over those playing pieces!
- Normadesmond
And now our runners-up:
For any reason, if Thombeau cannot fullfill his duties during his reign as The Gayest One of All, the first runner-up will take over his place.
That man is MR. PEENEE with his combination linen closet/Barbie doll sex club!...
And congratulations are in order for our second runner-up; Canada’s own RILEY and his Barbra Streisand doll!...
A big round of applause for all our contestants!
Thanks for participating in our The Gayest Thing in Your House Contest.
YOU’RE ALL FABULOUS!!!
Tuesday, November 08, 2011
Tabulating Big Gay Results
Mistress MJ is now tabulating the results of The Gayest Thing in Your House Contest.
[via]
Good luck to all our contestants!
Hurry the fuck up, bitch. We do NOT have all day!
Good luck to all our contestants!
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