Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Pubic Hair Report

We break briefly from The Freakin' Green Elf Shorts Caption Competition to bring you this report from our Thombeau.

Here's something peculiar and possibly disturbing. Whilst reading a book I had checked out from the library, I chanced upon a pubic hair which had been carefully taped onto page five. What can it mean?



The book, incidentally, is "1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus".

Just thought I'd share~! Have a lovely day.

Note: Everything in italics is in Thom's words.

31 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. LX: Why don’t you relax in an Ektorp armchair?

      Delete
  2. I work in a library, and you cannot imagine the gross things people leave in books - used tissues, used bandaids, etc., etc.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. CANADIAN GIRL: You poor thing.

      I’m waiting for this to become law up here.

      Delete
  3. Are we sure this is a pube? I live in hope that it's a cat hair.
    Meanwhile, Mr Beastie has posted, which is rather shocking.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SCARLET: Dare I venture over to Mr. Beastie’s lair?

      Has the stench of rancid old cheese left your blog since he visited?

      Delete
    2. I'm in too much of a state of shock to smell anything.
      Sx

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    3. I'm still in shock from visiting his "vagina party."

      Delete
  4. Maybe its part of an elaborate voodoo timetravel plot? In 50 years time, some old witch is going to check the book out of the library and use the hair to resurrect the corpse of whoever it belongs to in order to save/destroy the world? Or Milwaukee?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MR. DeVICE: I’ve been to Milwaukee and it doesn’t merit saving.

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. WALLY: Put a frame around it and you could likely make thousands at Sotheby’s.

      Delete
  6. Apparently this book was checked out from the PUBIC LIBRARY!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Perhaps the universe is prodding you into weaving that merkin you've always wanted...

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    2. THOM: Did you borrow that book in New York?

      WALLY: He’s discreetly wearing it as we speak.

      Delete
  7. Sounds like a precolumbian groupie to me.
    I've seen what he's left in Aku Aku.
    It's not pretty.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JASON: We KNOW Thom’s actually reading “How to Attract Men” by Liz Renay.

      Delete
    2. THOM: Not if it works for you, baby!

      Delete
  8. What a shame using tape, it's bad to the paper. Either one of the previous readers was annoyed to have found it and glued it in as a silent protest, or someone wants to mark their territory. Just ask Dan Brown, he'll write another silly novel about it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MAGO: One should never attempt to repair the book oneself…always ask the staff to do it.

      And one should never tape one’s pubic hair into a book…but in this case, DON’T ask the staff to do.

      Delete
  9. "There's many a man has more hair than wit."
    William Shakespeare

    Jx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JON: “People always ask me how long it takes to do my hair. I don't know, I'm never there.”
      - Dolly Parton

      Delete
  10. Where is my chuck bucket....that is gross!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MISTRESS MADDIE: Don't expect me to hold your hair.

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  11. Its a very big hair , they must have a bush like a.......well bush. Not suprised they are doing a little light pruning while enjoying a good book

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. BEAST: Speaking of pruning, have you seen the state of Miss Scarlet’s unruly bush?

      And is it true that you’ve posted?

      Delete
  12. I hate to think what one would find in a copy of Tama Janowitz's Cannibal in New York.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. More like dental floss, i'd say!

      Delete
    2. HUGGY JON: Where have YOU been hiding?

      Here’s a card for you.

      Delete