Saturday, May 31, 2014

Beach Bitches

I'm joining Norma on the beach today...



See you soon, Bitches.

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Here Come the Brides

Following a screening of Thunderball in which James Bond sets their pulses racing with his Jantzen swimming trunks ...


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Peenee and Norma (pictured above) wonder which of them will be chosen as the next Mrs. Sean Connery...

Testicle Tuesday

Click pic to biggify and enhance your viewing pleasure...

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Monday, May 26, 2014

Let's Have a BBQ!


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Both our British Bitches and our American Bitches have a day off today so let's celebrate with a barbecue!


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Enjoy!

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Meanwhile, Up In The Attic

Mistress MJ stores her Christmas ornaments and spare houseboys in the attic. Or "loft" as the Brits call it.


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What's in your attic, Bitches?

Friday, May 23, 2014

Firm Up Fast!

Firm up fast at the Infomaniac Gymnasium!


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Now, for a limited time only, guests of the Infomaniac Inn may receive room service personal trainers!

German Cuisine

Germany is known for its quality beer, delicious sausages, and mouth-watering Apfelstrudel.

But have you sampled the other side of German cuisine? Behold. German cocktail weenies and Cheese Crack...




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But just when we thought it couldn't get any wurst worse, Infomaniac presents "Tote Oma"...



Translated into English as "DEAD GRANDMA," Tote Oma consists of minced blood sausage fried with onions and bacon (recipe may vary according to regional preferences.) This dish is also known as “Verkehrsunfall” or "TRAFFIC ACCIDENT."

Guten Appetit!

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Munchies

We're fresh out of sausage rolls so we've sent Norma out shopping for snack food at the Infomaniac Grocery Store...



Any requests?

Sausage Roll, Anyone?

Following kabuki zero's out-of-control Sissy Boy Slap Party last evening in the RUMPus Room (thank you, Cookie,) everyone was a little peckish.


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Thankfully, LX whipped up some sausage rolls in the kitchen. Feel free to take a nibble as he comes 'round with his tray of delights.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

kabuki zero's birthday party - continued


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Oh, don't tell me you didn't see this coming.

kabuki zero's birthday party

kabuki's birthday party really starts swinging when....


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Fill in the blank.

Birthday Girls: Cher & kabuki zero

Happy birthday to Cher...



and our kabuki zero...



Separated at birth?

Monday, May 19, 2014

The Return of Charles and Camilla

Charles and Camilla have returned to Canada.




Look away now if you're bored...


Sunday, May 18, 2014

Fancy a Fag?

You Bitches know how much Mistress MJ enjoys smoking accoutrements (but not smoking). Well look what Norma found!...



An automatic fag vendor!

Actors can do other things besides act. Lew Cody, for instance, blossomed out as a full-fledged inventor when he applied for a patent on an ingenious cigarette vender patterned after a movie camera. One turn of the handle on the camera and a cigarette is ejected from the lens barrel, as demonstrated in the photo.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Get Fit Fast

Melt those pounds away at the Infomaniac Gymnasium!

Try our newest line of equipment...


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See our Norma (below) for a demonstration...


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Friday, May 16, 2014

Blessed are the Bakers

Today we celebrate the Feast Day of Saint Honoré, the patron saint of bakers. Aujourd'hui c'est la Saint Honoré, le saint patron des boulangers.


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Is that a baguette in your basket or are you just happy to see me?


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As it says here, "If anyone needed a patron saint in the Middle Ages, it was the bakers. As Phyllis Magida points out in Eating, Drinking, and Thinking, bakers suffered "bakers' asthma" from inhaling flour dust, "bakers' knee" from nearly eighteen hours-a-day bending and lifting, and "bakers' eczema" - an infectious skin disease caused by the clogging of their skin pores by the flour. Bakers who were convicted of short-changing customers or using bad grain were subject to the "bakers' gallows, a terrible contraption by which the baker was hoisted in a basket and dropped 40 feet into a pool of mud usually resulting in multiple fractures."

And you Bitches thought the Oubliette was torture.

In France, St. Honoré's feast day is celebrated with a week-long festival of bread, "la Fête du Pain."

We here at Infomaniac wish to honor this occasion with... wait for it...



Do NOT click here.

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Indisposed

Mistress MJ continues to be indisposed.



It is possible she may require medical intervention.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Sending You to Muscato Land

Mistress MJ is under the weather and must spend the day with her head in traction.


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Since there's nothing to see here, we suggest you visit Muscato and wish him a happy birthday.

Monday, May 12, 2014

International Nurses Day


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Today is International Nurses Day. In fact, we employ several nurses here at the Infomaniac Medical Clinic.

So remember...


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Sunday, May 11, 2014

Do Us All A Favour

If you are a parent or if you know someone who is a parent, do us all a favour and teach your kids some manners.



And furthermore, if the little bastards are running around screaming and shouting in a store, get them the hell out of there.

Oh, and happy Mother's Day.

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Bottoms Up, Bitches!



Cheers! Santé! Prosit! Sláinte! Cin Cin! Skål!


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No matter what you say when you raise your glass or where you come from, here's to the weekend, Bitches!

Friday, May 09, 2014

To The Games Room!

Enjoy your weekend in the Infomaniac Games Room...


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Wednesday, May 07, 2014

Public Service Announcement #28

A man was reportedly doing naked push-ups right before a vehicle struck and killed him in Portland, Oregon on Sunday.



Police officers responded after receiving a call about a man running naked in traffic. They received other calls reporting that the man was doing push-ups in the roadway and was struck by a vehicle. He died at the scene.

Let this be a reminder to you not to play in the middle of the road. Instead, we invite you to use the Infomaniac Gymnasium.

This has been an Infomaniac Public Service Announcement.

Tuesday, May 06, 2014

Public Service Announcement #27

Please do not drive distracted.

In other words, no phoning, texting or checking your emails...

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No applying makeup or curling your eyelashes...

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And no obstructing the steering wheel...


Keep your eyes on the road, your hands upon the wheel

This has been an Infomaniac Public Service Announcement.

Monday, May 05, 2014

Donuts! Donuts! Donuts!


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Back in the day, when I lived in this neighbourhood, gentrification had not yet arrived and it was known "as a neighbourhood rife with poverty, crime, drugs, homelessness, and large numbers of people living with mental illness."

The only donut shop was a chain called "Country Style Donuts." The shop was completely lacking in ambience unless you consider hard orange plastic seats and harsh florescent lighting the ultimate in décor.

Mistress Maddie has informed me via her post here, that the neighourhood has a new donut shop. Can you guess what it's called?....



The donuts, although more expensive than the usual chain shops ($30 for a dozen donuts!) are made from scratch and the place is getting rave reviews. Not exactly the druggie's donut shop of choice anymore.

Last time I checked, the old "Country Style Donuts" had been made over into an upscale cafe but maybe it's a condo development now. The fleabag flophouse hotel across the street is now a trendy urban hotspot for the artsy crowd. They made a documentary about it. So yes, the neighbourhood has changed but you can now get a decent donut.


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I don't know whether this post is about donuts or gentrification. Or glory holes. I'll leave that up to you, Bitches.

Sunday, May 04, 2014

Reading Week - Books Edition



As Reading Week draws to a close here on Infomaniac, we'd like to know what you're reading, what you've recently read and can recommend, and what you're looking forward to reading.


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Thursday, May 01, 2014

Reading Week - Magazine Edition

As Reading Week continues here on Infomaniac, we want to know which magazines you enjoy reading.


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And where do you pick up your magazines?


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At a newsstand or bookstore? Library? Doctor's office? Or do you use a digital subscription service such as Newsstand, Next Issue or Zinio?

Put that magazine down for a minute and tell us, Bitches.


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