Thursday, February 12, 2009

Infomaniac House of Beauty

Welcome to the Infomaniac House of Beauty!

Today we’re booking appointments for a trim…




Staff are standing by to take your calls…

44 comments:

  1. She looks a might chilled, now that she has been dethatched.

    Even the dethatchers are blue with the cold!

    Someone turn the heat up!

    Fourth!

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  2. get the shears out......I have issues......hairy issues....I once had a girlfriend who offerd to bpay to have my body hair electronically removed......it didn't work out with us.....

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  3. Manuel, I have horse clippers.... I have body clipped horses.... MJ could take pics while I clip yours and do a lovely post here for all to see. ;-)

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  4. With pleasure Aphrodite received the lovable offering

    of the small bonnet which wound the head of Samyta:

    It's, really, of exquisite workmanship and it gently smells of the nectar

    with which the goddess sprinkles the handsome Adonis.

    -----------
    The Greek text speaks of a "Locke", a twirl maybe ...
    (http://www.locriantica.it/english/figures/nossis.htm)

    Mary Quandt had her's in the form of a heart.

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  5. @mago--I thought they were "Schtroumpf"? Or maybe I made that up. At any rate, the dear little things have no business around those lady parts.

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  6. "Schtr(o)umpf" is the original Belgian / French name. In Germany they are known as "Schlümpfe", single "der Schlumpf". It was invented by the German publisher, Kauka, who's name shall be dis-honoured in eternity for all the crimes he committed to the fine art of comic-strip by "translating", "re-arranging" and what not: He shall burn in hell.

    Footnote: "Strumpf" in German means "sock" or "socks".

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  7. ouchouchouch!!!

    just the thought of that stuff growing back...owieeeee, owieeee, owieeee!!!

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  8. Smurfs were my youth obsession. I have about 3000 of them...never saw them doing that... but then again we never know what a smurf does when no one is looking.

    (in Portuguese they were called Estrumfe, that is the same sound as the original French name)

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  9. *stares at picture*

    is it Friday already?

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  10. If it is Friday, this marks a turning point of not having photos of fat old nekkid men burning our retinas.

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  11. Two thangs about Brazil come to mined;
    one, a poppler proceedyer what fancy city-Ladies do to thayer whiskers afore puttin' on itsy-bitsy yeller polkee-dot beekeenees,
    and two,
    the inviwrongmental problam of nativefellers deforestatin the jungall soes that thay can commence growin wacky tabbacky or cokayn.

    So how do you say Smurfs in Brazilyan?

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  12. Oh Smurfett is gonna be pissed.

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  13. PEEVISH: That was a very dignified “first”.

    A smidgeon of excitement as noted by the exclamation point but no use of upper case letters or unnecessary boasting or the one-upmanship so common ‘round these parts.

    BILLY: Mistress MJ will buff you up.

    MAGO: It’s hard to get good help these days.

    PONITA: Turn the heat up?

    This isn’t Winnipeg, you know.

    MANUEL: Your arse is sacred.

    Don’t ever let anyone pluck a hair from your glorious big hairy Irish arse.

    Thank heavens Little Miss Manuel respects the glory that is Manuel’s arse.

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  14. PONITA: Back away from Manuel’s arse NOW!

    MAGO: Mistress MJ would like to fashion your public hair into a Mohawk.

    LEAH: I believe that Mago is trying to say that he wants you to knit a pair of socks for him.

    Are you up for it?

    MAGO: Did you know that Leah is skilled in the craft of sock-knitting?

    Perhaps she could knit a funeral pyre scene involving Kauka.

    SAVANNAH: We’ll be gentle.

    Why don’t you book an appointment and try it the Infomaniac way?

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  15. FABULASTIC: 3000 Estrumfe?!

    Prepare me a nice Bacalhau whilst I contemplate your madness.

    XL: Mistress MJ has pillows that need fluffing.

    Pay attention!

    BOXER: Filthy Friday is cancelled this week and, due to popular demand, will be replaced with Fashion Friday.

    The people have spoken.

    PONITA: Just for that I’m gonna do an entire post dedicated to fat nekkid old men.

    Just watch me.

    BASS-ACKWARDS: Why don’t you ask your cousin Donn?

    You know…the one with the BIG BRAIN?

    CHER: She’s already got her pick of all the Smurfs in the village, the floozie!

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  16. KNUDSEN: You had me in a half Nelson at your place.

    Payback!

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  17. i wish my hipbones were so well defined.

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  18. I'll take a pedicure please. And come to think of it, a manicure would be much needed too.

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  19. CARNALIS: Trust me when I say they bruise easily.

    They've a tendency to arrive at a closed door before the rest of one's body.

    CYBERPOOF: You're in luck.

    There's a farrier on our payroll.

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  20. Thanks Mago for the lil history. Actually very interesting.

    And yes, I noticed the hipbones too...

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  21. But still, if the only choice is the tiny-scissors-wielding-little-Socks, I think I'll hang onto my Jewfro for now, thanks anyway...

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  22. Shame. Now no-one can play in her thicket.
    Sx

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  23. thinking of cutting my hair today...just can't figure out if i should cut north or south? Little help?

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  24. Do Smurfs use the pubic hair clippings to thatch the roofs of their cottages then?

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  25. Is that vagina smiling at me, or is it the medication?

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  26. IVD: Oops! That wrong number was me.

    Who else could it have been?

    By the way, have you ever actually seen ladies bits up close other than in pictures?

    No, I don’t suppose you see much of that down at the docks.

    LEAH: Besides giving a top-notch foot massage, Mago is our resident scholar.

    Do you store your knitting needles in your JewFro?

    SCARLET: Shame. Now no-one can play in her thicket.

    From what I’ve heard, there’s plenty of room in yours.

    DAISY: thinking of cutting my hair today...just can't figure out if i should cut north or south? Little help?

    Why not let our stylists go freestyle?

    Or would you prefer a shag?…haircut, that is.

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  27. PONITA: Ooops, er, I meant to say that.

    Everything Mago does is public…

    Foot massages, etc.

    BETTY: Do Smurfs use the pubic hair clippings to thatch the roofs of their cottages then?

    Good observation!

    Yes, they do.

    You might call it a cottage industry.

    SMUNTY: Is that vagina smiling at me, or is it the medication?

    You’re looking at it from the wrong angle.

    All vaginas sneer at the very sight of you.

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  28. This can't be right - they don't have Brazilian Smurfs - they are a European mistake.
    NB - this was before the Brits became European.

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  29. KAZ: Would you prefer to be coiffed by the Wombles?

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  30. come over for drinks, sugar! xoxox

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  31. Grrrr my comments keep dissapearing off your blog , it must be allergic to me .
    Is that IVD's front bottom ?

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  32. SAVANNAH: I’d love to come for drinks if only I weren’t about to go out for the rest of the day.

    Rain check?

    BEAST: One would naturally assume it was IVD’s front bottom.

    However, note that it’s not as large, loose or gaping.

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  33. Since IT is Friday night I can give myself some licence and say the following: The actual political crisis and this picture had me thinking on something that I just want to shout out of the window just wearing my silky red robe-de-chambre:

    YES, WE CUNT!

    (Good manners will return in a moment)

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  34. SAVANNAH: I'm drinking as I type.

    Cheers.

    FABULASTIC: Get the mouth on her!

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  35. much, much too thin to be real, i dare say. no doubt the girl who defined "mons"

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  36. SEA: *hums "I'm Your Venus"*

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