Saturday, December 07, 2013

Cock Rings and Chains and Things

Incorporate any of the items (in the text of this book or the photo) into a song.


[via Zenfancy]

My tune would be sung to "The Sound of Music" song, "My Favourite Things."

♫Men wearing cock rings attached to their noodles
Chains at the tearoom where I eats me strudels
Big manly packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favourite things♫

42 comments:

  1. Tearoom Glory = Earl Grey Teabags?

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  2. Studded jock straps
    And back alley encounters
    Assless black chaps
    And the smell of fresh poppers
    Elbow grease all over my dick
    These a few of my favorite things!

    When my wife calls
    And my kids nag
    And I'm feeling sad
    I simply remember a few of those things
    And suddenly I feel so glad.

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    Replies
    1. COOKIE: *keels over laughing*

      I think I just woke up the entire neighbourhood.

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    2. Now if only we could get the Westminster Abbey Choir to record it, a la Jerusalem from the Royal wedding.

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    3. COOKIE: The Westminster Abbey Choir?

      I can picture that.

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  3. "Oh come all ye cock rings...joyful and triumphant..."

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    Replies
    1. EFFINGBS: Burt, you’ve put me in a festive spirit!

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  4. If you want it then you gotta put a ring on it
    If you want it gotta chain and put a thing on it
    Tearoom glory... Oh Oh Ohh Ho
    Tearoom glory... oh oh oh ho

    I'm twerking as I write...

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    Replies
    1. PRINNY: Twerk it and work it, Bitch!

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  5. I will have to go away and work on this one. But mine would include dunking the hobnob and steamy chocolate.
    Sx

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    Replies
    1. MISS SCARLET: I am oddly turned on.

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  6. Mine would be to the tune of Dana's All Kind Of Everything:

    Cock rings
    Chains and things
    Tearoom for two
    All kinds of everything reminds me of you.

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    Replies
    1. MITZI: For those who missed the Eurovision Song Contest 1970, here she is.

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  7. Land of Tearoom Glory, Mother called Chi Chi,
    How shall we extol thee, who are born of thee?
    Tighter still and tighter shall thy bounds be set;
    Jeff Stryker, who made thee mighty, make thee mightier yet,
    Jeff Stryker, who made thee mighty, make thee mightier yet!


    Jx

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    Replies
    1. JON: Thanks to Bitches like you, there’ll always be an England.

      I’m tempted to insert “wider still and wider” back into that lyric. Teehee.

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    2. {Possibly not the moment to mention I am Welsh, not English.}

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    3. JON: Are you a Jones, Williams, Davies or Evans?

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    4. JON: Well then.

      Are you from Llanddewi Brefi?

      And were you the only gay in the village?

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    5. Another Bacardi and Coke please, Myfanwy Jones! Jx

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    6. Daffyd Thomas, you bloody fool! You could have had a bit of cock there.

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  8. I'm sticking with the xmas theme...

    Cock test you merry Endians with some chains, cockrings and toys-

    Remember Tea room glory is just for gay cowboys-
    To get their nut and many others, while on full display-
    O, writhing in agony & joy;
    This ball-gag will keep you from making noise...

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    Replies
    1. WALLY: ♫I’ll get you, I’ll get you in the END(ian)♫

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    2. From your lips to santa's ears.....

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  9. Oh, darlings, it's all as if we never said goobye.... *sniff*

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    Replies
    1. MUSCATO: ♫I Never Can Say Goodbye.

      No, no, no.
      There's a very strange vibration
      Piercing me right to the core.♫

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  10. From the famous musical "Sally In The Alley" (1917), The chorus of Under the Bamboo Tree.

    Cowboys all run
    and Indians all flee
    whenever the chains they see.
    Cockrings for you,
    Tearooms for me,
    Oh what a life there'd be.
    (repeat pianissimo)

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    Replies
    1. GROUCHY: I’m singing along but I failed to reach that final high note.

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  11. Mine would have to be Everything's Coming Up Cock Rings, sung of course,by the late Ethel Mermen. Some days it's all I see.

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  12. Five
    Five dollar
    Five dollar fat schlong

    Five
    Five dollar
    Five dollar fat schlong

    It's ca-ca-ca-catching on

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    Replies
    1. HAYWARD: I’ll never be able to look at a Subway sandwich in the same way ever again.

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  13. Those cover lines scan with Sonny and Cher's 'Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves' xxx

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    Replies
    1. LULU: ♫But every night all the men would come around
      And lay their money down♫

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  14. Replies
    1. It seems I heard it twice... grrr

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    2. LENI: Until now, I always thought Big Bob was a chain of restaurants but I was thinking of Bob’s Big Boy.

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  15. Cock Ring
    you make my heart sing
    you make everything
    Groovy ...

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    Replies
    1. MAGO: ♫Cock ring
      Hold me tight♫

      Delete
  16. chanukah, chanukah,
    chag doe min sov, sov,
    sov, sov, sov,
    sov, sov, sov,
    please take off your glove!

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