Thursday, April 29, 2010

Welcome Wagon

Mistress MJ would like to thank all the newcomers who delurked on Delurking Day.



We hope you’ll come again.

To make you new bitches feel more at home, we’re asking our regular readers to help out.

We’d like all regular Infomaniac bitches to write a brief description about yourselves in the comments section.

That will give our newcomers a better idea of who’s who.

Just remember, Infomaniac is not a dating service.

Note: Some Infomaniac bitches are exempt from this exercise as they are either ill (KAZ); on vacation (Miss Scarlet and Random Chick); on hiatus (First Nations); or have gone to the dark side, i.e. Facebook (Donn). In other words, half of my Blogroll. But the rest of you bitches have no excuse.

42 comments:

  1. I am Official Infomaniac Pillow Fluffer and Personal IT Consultant To Mistress MJ.

    It is traditional for all newbies to ask The Mistress for a cake.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I provide witty comments. Brains and beauty. It's a challenge sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm just here for the laughs and fun--this place is like my fave bar where the patrons are funny and the good times are a plenty!

    Sometimes, I keep the newspapers and mail from piling up the Infomaniac steps when the Mistress is off on an exotic holiday/rehab. Just being neighborly.

    I like good food; good people; and good times. I like long walks on the beach, er...wait. And I'm in Texas! Howdy! And Welcome to Infomaniac!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm gay and I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE Kylie

    ReplyDelete
  5. That was what you wanted me to say, right?

    ReplyDelete
  6. i live in a rather large house on sunset boulevard with a monkey buried in the yard. max, my servant and ex-husband only lives to serve me. i pay him next to nothing.....wait a minute, i'm sorry, don't know what got into me. i live in a lovely trailer community outside of homosassa springs , florida. i spend my days making crafts, which i sell on ebay & grooming my pet cat, mr. pickles. my favorite TV show is HGTV and i attend as many josh grobin concerts as i can get to. ever since i had my gastric bypass, my life just gets more wonderful everyday, praise the lord!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Miss MJ imagines covering me with chick pea curry and romping together on my beautiful fireside rug.There are also vile fruit related fantasies.I am treated like a sex object.

    ReplyDelete
  8. References to my large feet, dazzling wit and charming hat show up here a lot because Mistress is jealous.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am also an animal welfare enthusiast , I visit often to ensure the wellbeing of Miss MJ's magnificent beaver

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am a lazy witch with absolutely no stalkerish tendancies. None.
    I'm also MJ's personal casting director, having managed to get her top billing in a number of Cusp productions. OK, so they might be my productions, but, if you were paying attention, you already know I'm too lazy to actively seek out other roles for her.

    Here, read these snippets about me as I can't be arsed to think of anything new/of my own:

    “Ever heard the phrase 'Friend of Dorothy'? Well, meet Dorothy. As queer as they come. A fully qualified, professional, mincing machine. Complete with neurotic split personality and everything.”
    An introduction by Piggy & Tazzy.

    "We are a witch. I say 'We are' because there are four of us in this one body. Although, technically, only two of us are proper witches: myself, Inexplicable DeVice, and my SubConscious. The other two are witches by proxy: The Host (who shall remain nameless due to the nature of his work) who supplies his body for interaction in the physical world, and his SubConscious - a stubborn and contrary piece of work if ever I shared a body with one. Together, we are a formidable foe with various collectable accessories (All sold seperately. Contents and colour may vary. Not suitable for children under the age of 3. No, 5. Actually, make that 8. Oh sod it, 16. And that's my final offer). Now bugger off. I'm busy!"
    No, really, I *am* busy, as my Blogger Profile says.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I tend bar at Informaniac. Only because the rest of the bitches are to slow to open the damn bottle.

    I'm also Robert Downey Jr's official stalker. Mistress is kind enough to post up pictures of himself, only if I'm good...which of course, isn't very often.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Tazzy and Piggy:

    Yorkshire's favourite cunts.

    We hate everyone in a loveable way.

    That's all you need to know.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I know ways to cook with insects, I come here for the sex and fashion tips.

    The downside to this place are the warty cocks, the cake-farts and there are too many Crocs for my liking

    ReplyDelete
  14. i'm here to provide southern comfort and hospitality, sugarpies! i host parties on the plantation and wear lovely gowns. xoxoxox

    ReplyDelete
  15. XL: I am Official Infomaniac Pillow Fluffer and Personal IT Consultant To Mistress MJ.
    It is traditional for all newbies to ask The Mistress for a cake.


    The first newbie to ask for cake will get an extra slice.

    MICHAEL RIVERS: I provide witty comments. Brains and beauty. It's a challenge sometimes.

    And humility.

    You forgot humility.

    EROS: I'm just here for the laughs and fun--this place is like my fave bar where the patrons are funny and the good times are a plenty!
    Sometimes, I keep the newspapers and mail from piling up the Infomaniac steps when the Mistress is off on an exotic holiday/rehab. Just being neighborly.
    I like good food; good people; and good times. I like long walks on the beach, er...wait. And I'm in Texas! Howdy! And Welcome to Infomaniac!


    New bitches may also be interested to see how you look half-nekkid.

    CYBERPOOF: I'm gay and I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE Kylie
    That was what you wanted me to say, right?


    That pretty much sums it up!

    Well, that and your penchant for hot sweaty interplanetary manlovin.

    ReplyDelete
  16. NORMADESMOND: i live in a rather large house on sunset boulevard with a monkey buried in the yard. max, my servant and ex-husband only lives to serve me. i pay him next to nothing.....wait a minute, i'm sorry, don't know what got into me. i live in a lovely trailer community outside of homosassa springs , florida. i spend my days making crafts, which i sell on ebay & grooming my pet cat, mr. pickles. my favorite TV show is HGTV and i attend as many josh grobin concerts as i can get to. ever since i had my gastric bypass, my life just gets more wonderful everyday, praise the lord!

    Perhaps you would like to expound on your beauty secret…Velva cream?

    BEAST: Miss MJ imagines covering me with chick pea curry and romping together on my beautiful fireside rug.There are also vile fruit related fantasies.I am treated like a sex object.

    This is all you need to know about Beast, folks.

    MR. PEENEE: References to my large feet, dazzling wit and charming hat show up here a lot because Mistress is jealous.

    Newcomers beware.

    Mr. Peenee is the devil.

    BEAST: I am also an animal welfare enthusiast , I visit often to ensure the wellbeing of Miss MJ's magnificent beaver

    Once again…this is all you need to know about Beast, folks.

    ReplyDelete
  17. IVD: I am a lazy witch with absolutely no stalkerish tendancies. None.
    I'm also MJ's personal casting director, having managed to get her top billing in a number of Cusp productions. OK, so they might be my productions, but, if you were paying attention, you already know I'm too lazy to actively seek out other roles for her.
    Here, read these snippets about me as I can't be arsed to think of anything new/of my own:
    “Ever heard the phrase 'Friend of Dorothy'? Well, meet Dorothy. As queer as they come. A fully qualified, professional, mincing machine. Complete with neurotic split personality and everything.”
    An introduction by Piggy & Tazzy.
    "We are a witch. I say 'We are' because there are four of us in this one body. Although, technically, only two of us are proper witches: myself, Inexplicable DeVice, and my SubConscious. The other two are witches by proxy: The Host (who shall remain nameless due to the nature of his work) who supplies his body for interaction in the physical world, and his SubConscious - a stubborn and contrary piece of work if ever I shared a body with one. Together, we are a formidable foe with various collectable accessories (All sold seperately. Contents and colour may vary. Not suitable for children under the age of 3. No, 5. Actually, make that 8. Oh sod it, 16. And that's my final offer).
    Now bugger off. I'm busy!"
    No, really, I *am* busy, as my Blogger Profile says.


    Newcomers should be advised to steer clear of IVD’s warty wand.

    ROSES: I tend bar at Informaniac. Only because the rest of the bitches are to slow to open the damn bottle.
    I'm also Robert Downey Jr's official stalker. Mistress is kind enough to post up pictures of himself, only if I'm good...which of course, isn't very often.


    Note that Miss Roses is well into her cups and has misspelled Infomaniac.

    We needn’t ask her to walk a straight line.

    TAZZY AND PIGGY: Tazzy and Piggy:
    Yorkshire's favourite cunts.
    We hate everyone in a loveable way.
    That's all you need to know.


    Taz & Pig run a retirement home for tired old poofters.

    LULU: I know ways to cook with insects, I come here for the sex and fashion tips.
    The downside to this place are the warty cocks, the cake-farts and there are too many Crocs for my liking


    I’ve told you never to mention the C-word!

    SAVANNAH: i'm here to provide southern comfort and hospitality, sugarpies! i host parties on the plantation and wear lovely gowns.

    Savannah tied with me in Princess’s contest for Most Appealing Frock.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I'm 90% beard and 10% penis.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I'm just here for the endorphins.

    Actually I provide an air of respectability to MJ's blog between polishing my silver and planning candlelight suppers...

    ReplyDelete
  20. Holey moley! What a cast of characters. The Brady Bunch it ain't, more like the Munsters. I feel at home already.

    May I have some cake please?

    ReplyDelete
  21. Riley, I think less the Munsters, more like the Aadams Family!

    Mistress, even if I were sober (wash your mouth out), I wouldn't walk a straight line. I'm incapable of towing the line, walking it, taking any notice of it...which is why I hang out here.

    Can't wait for FF now!

    ReplyDelete
  22. HEFF: I'm 90% beard and 10% penis.

    The new bitches should be aware that you’re not just a pretty face.

    Heff also has quite the green thumb and can cook!

    “Floral Heff” they call him.

    MICHAEL GUY: I'm just here for the endorphins.
    Actually I provide an air of respectability to MJ's blog between polishing my silver and planning candlelight suppers...


    New bitches should be told that “polishing my silver” is a euphemism.

    RILEY: Holey moley! What a cast of characters. The Brady Bunch it ain't, more like the Munsters. I feel at home already.
    May I have some cake please?


    Did someone mention cake?

    You get an extra slice for being first to ask.

    Oh, and it appears that Miss Roses is talking to you.

    See comment below.

    ROSES: Riley, I think less the Munsters, more like the Aadams Family!
    Mistress, even if I were sober (wash your mouth out), I wouldn't walk a straight line. I'm incapable of towing the line, walking it, taking any notice of it...which is why I hang out here.
    Can't wait for FF now!


    Please try to remember that these are newcomers and they may not be hip to the Infomaniac lingo, i.e. “FF”.

    New bitches: “FF” refers to Filthy Friday…tune in tomorrow is all I’m sayin’.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Gotta time these visits for cocktail hour - way too early for warts, crocs and cake farts. See you round 5ish, perhaps with a pressie of my own.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I am still around until Sunday...
    I can proudly state that I am the official Infomaniac beautician. I have a natural way with butter sticks and squashed dung beetles.
    Please make bookings well in advance and be aware that cancellations are non-negotiable.[see sub-section 17, paragraph 711 of the Informanic Bitches Handbook - appendix 274].
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  25. Having finished the knitting lessons, what did go withoout a stitch *sigh*, I turned my attention to Mistress MJ's highly attractive feet. Highheeled, stillettoed, now and then the little beauties simply need to relax.
    Oils, scents, a fine massage: Serving A Relaxed Mistress.

    CyperPetra still being the official shoe adviser?

    ReplyDelete
  26. RILEY: Gotta time these visits for cocktail hour - way too early for warts, crocs and cake farts. See you round 5ish, perhaps with a pressie of my own.

    I can’t imagine what you’re up to.

    And I’ll be out this evening, leaving the blog unattended.

    *fondles worry beads*

    SCARLET: I am still around until Sunday...
    I can proudly state that I am the official Infomaniac beautician. I have a natural way with butter sticks and squashed dung beetles.
    Please make bookings well in advance and be aware that cancellations are non-negotiable.[see sub-section 17, paragraph 711 of the Informanic Bitches Handbook - appendix 274].


    Let it be known that Miss Scarlet’s name has been cleared in the Mean Dirty Pirate Leprosarium versus The Infomaniac House of Beauty legal case.

    Please refrain from calling her “Leprosy Lezzie” from now on.

    MAGO: Having finished the knitting lessons, what did go withoout a stitch *sigh*, I turned my attention to Mistress MJ's highly attractive feet. Highheeled, stillettoed, now and then the little beauties simply need to relax.
    Oils, scents, a fine massage: Serving A Relaxed Mistress.
    CyperPetra still being the official shoe adviser?


    New bitches would be advised not to ask to borrow the massage services of Mago.

    This is a mistake that Miss Roses, Miss Savannah and Miss Scarlet have all made from time to time.

    As for CyberPetra, he’s probably out looking for some for hot sweaty interplanetary manlovin.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm the one who brings the vodka, begs for Old K's cap and sometimes cleans up around here after a big party.

    and I like to Box.

    Oh, and I'm not a dude. Let's get that very clear.

    ReplyDelete
  28. BOXER: I'm the one who brings the vodka, begs for Old K's cap and sometimes cleans up around here after a big party.
    and I like to Box.
    Oh, and I'm not a dude. Let's get that very clear.


    She has a vodka FOUNTAIN, bitches.

    So be nice to her.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I bring the Brooklyn, and my hopelessly romantic attachment to everyone here.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Frobisher - A professional cabaret artiste. Warm, funny, slightly shy. A certain amount of personal tragedy in the past - but remarkably unscarred. And more than a hint of unparalled sexual athletasism.

    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  31. LEAH: I bring the Brooklyn, and my hopelessly romantic attachment to everyone here.

    Leah has neglected to mention her lust-driven Alan Rickman fixation which you can read about here.

    FROBI: Frobisher - A professional cabaret artiste. Warm, funny, slightly shy. A certain amount of personal tragedy in the past - but remarkably unscarred. And more than a hint of unparalled sexual athletasism.

    Excuse me? SHY?

    *checks to see what planet I’m on*

    ReplyDelete
  32. Miss J stops by briefly whenever she thinks they're not watching her at work.

    ReplyDelete
  33. MISS JANEY: Miss J stops by briefly whenever she thinks they're not watching her at work.

    In that case, we suggest you DON’T stop by, even briefly, tomorrow (Friday).

    No, really.

    ReplyDelete
  34. i am kabuki zero. I am in winchester virginia. I am currently enjoying my status as a gay megastar who looks for love, tutors the masses, and maintains a sensible head at all times. (the magic penguin made me say that). stop by -blow your mind.

    ReplyDelete
  35. KABUKI: i am kabuki zero. I am in winchester virginia. I am currently enjoying my status as a gay megastar who looks for love, tutors the masses, and maintains a sensible head at all times. (the magic penguin made me say that). stop by -blow your mind.

    Not just a megastar…a GIGASTAR!

    More than your mind will be blown at Madame kabuki’s.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I'm here because I love Mistress MJ's wit and her hilarious comments on my blog. Her own followers are legion.

    I try not to visit on Filthy Friday's due to my delicate constitution.

    ReplyDelete
  37. JILL: I'm here because I love Mistress MJ's wit and her hilarious comments on my blog. Her own followers are legion.
    I try not to visit on Filthy Friday's due to my delicate constitution.


    Yet notice how Jill has left her comment ON a Friday!

    ReplyDelete
  38. I am La Diva of La Diva Cucina and write a food blog that has nothing to do with perverts, voyeurs, oubliettes or cheesy dicks. I love the sea and try to live between Sydney, Miami and any other fabulous locale that grows a palm tree.

    I love Filthy Fridays as I often get bored and love cleaning up coffee that has squirted through my nose onto my keyboard after seeing Mistress' post. I'm sick that way.

    I enjoy being snarky, drinking copious amounts of booze, bossing around the houseboys and trying to steal Robert Downey Junior from Roses. I make cocktails too but prefer to just drink them.

    Roses, darling, when WILL that pitcher of Manhattans be ready?!

    Besitos!

    ReplyDelete
  39. I'm here because, beneath my proper exterior, I'm a wanton bitch in heat.

    ReplyDelete
  40. LA DIVA CUCINA: I am La Diva of La Diva Cucina and write a food blog that has nothing to do with perverts, voyeurs, oubliettes or cheesy dicks. I love the sea and try to live between Sydney, Miami and any other fabulous locale that grows a palm tree.
    I love Filthy Fridays as I often get bored and love cleaning up coffee that has squirted through my nose onto my keyboard after seeing Mistress' post. I'm sick that way.
    I enjoy being snarky, drinking copious amounts of booze, bossing around the houseboys and trying to steal Robert Downey Junior from Roses. I make cocktails too but prefer to just drink them.
    Roses, darling, when WILL that pitcher of Manhattans be ready?!
    Besitos!


    I think Miss Roses has passed out again.

    You’re not going to let that pitcher of Manhattans go to waste, are you?

    TJB: I'm here because, beneath my proper exterior, I'm a wanton bitch in heat.

    Your Secret Gentleman Place is flamin’!

    ReplyDelete
  41. MUTLEY: Hay? What ? oh....

    Newcomers may have noticed that Mr. Mutley often appears dazed and confused.

    Please assist him in finding a cozy place to nap while we carry on.

    ReplyDelete