Thursday, August 04, 2011

YOUR GARDENING PHOTOS!

Thanks to all the Infomaniac Bitches who submitted photos of their gardens, plants and flowers.


Note: Clicking on most of these photos enlarges them and shows off their beauty. Apologies that I couldn’t make them bigger on the screen. Oh, and this is not a contest as some folk think…it’s simply a glimpse into your gardens.

Let’s have a peek into your secret gardens now, shall we?

MS. FIRST NATIONS
Rancho FirstNations, under fierce attack by Imperial Daleks.


THOMBEAU
Here's a bit of my garden! It's sort of between blooms, but you get the idea. I planted everything but the trees, put in the stone walkway, etc.. Have veggies, too, but they're not as photogenic. I love gardening, it's something I never got to do during my 25 years in Chicago. And it helps keep me sane, whatever that means. Anyway, these may not be the sort of pics you have in mind---the only naked troll was the one behind the camera!---but I thought I'd share.



MITZI
Mary Mary quite contrary. How does your garden grow? I thought you might like this picture of old whore Libby Ellis.
I took pity on a bag of dahlia tubers displayed on a discounted shelf in Wilkinsons. The tubers had started to sprout in their torn plastic prison. That was four months ago and just look how they have rewarded me, although I'm not a dahlia person, they're well worth the 10p I paid for them. The ivy growing up the wall is a cutting I took from Norman Clegg's house from Last Of The Summer Wine.



WALLY
This is my garden in New York City.
The best thing about it is that if you are in any room of my apartment and look out any window, this is what you see, not buildings, cars, trains and people.
Many different flowers, spring, summer & fall, If you are feeling peckish grab a nectarine or a fig or a bunch of grapes, savory herbs grow all around.
I walk barefoot around this, my home, and my little dog Mickey has never worn a leash; he runs free...






AYEM8Y
We've been having the most beastly heat and drought this summer and as a result most of my potted plants have suffered a horrible death. Yes that is a water hose. I'm to lazy to turn the damn thing on.


CHICKORY
I know, I know. I forgot to pose nekkid while being mounted by a rooster or something.



BOXER
This is how I grow flowers. I don’t. Instead, I pot rusty metal ones that will not die from my lack of attention.



BEAST
Note from Mistress MJ: Beast hasn’t time to write a blurb due to his hectic schedule as kitchen slave at Café C. Nonetheless, he manages to find the time to maintain a lovely garden oasis in Bournemouth, England. Click on his last photo to see the funhouse mirror!







JASON
Here's my fairy ring which sprung up
just this morning!


INEXPLICABLE DeVICE
I was quickly flicking through the blogworld the other day to see what I'd been missing and thought to myself I must do some hoeing! Unfortunately, time has escaped me, so I cannot offer anything of mirth or innuendo. Instead, I offer an update of Castle DeVice's vegetable garden as of the end of June. For those that are interested in its progression, there's a couple of photos in this post that show the 'before' and 'beforer'.




GEOFF
This is the lavender bush the bees love so much. Unfortunately there are fewer bees this year than last. We are sad to see the bees disappear.



STEPHEN


MR. PEENEE
When we moved to Chez Peenee 14 years ago, the backyard was covered in an invasive weed called Scotch Broom. I pulled each and every one of those bitches out by hand and have been fighting with the yard ever since. I am pretty sure I am not winning.



LX
The Cycad is my favorite yard plant because of its color, shape, and size. I have used these as feature plants on Maui and in Austin. Some people refer to these as "Sago Palms." They are idiots.


PRINCESS
Some shots of around my garden, none current, as it is mid winter here (Australia) and the place looks a mess!











MISS SCARLET
Here are the pictures of my poorly plant. I believe it's a clamatis.
But as you can see in the second pic... where there is life there is hope...




RANDOM CHICK
I've attached my entries for your Garden Party contest...or Greenery Contest, or whatever it is. As long as we get to see more arses I don't care! These photos are from our low-maintenance garden. We just planted stuff and let it grow and it went wild! We'll be having corn, squash, zebra tomatoes, and green bell peppers for dinner forever!!





ROSES
Please find attached two pictures: inside bush and outside bush. The inside bush...well actually there are several. The big one is a devil's ivy, there are two orchids and for the life of me, I can't remember what the purple/silver variegated plans are called. The outside bush...those were my adorable Hellebores.



COOKIE
The garden (and the roses) peaked about a month ago.


Let’s welcome to Infomaniac two new Infomaniac Bitches: CoreyJo and IlDuce!...

COREYJO
Here is a Peace Lily I received when my 2 year old daughter Maggie Alice past away. In front is a Redwings gnome I bought my husband for Christmas the year Maggie Alice was born. These items sit where you will see them anytime to go to any room in the house.


ILDUCE
The front garden, up until two years ago this was all grass & chain link.



KEEP HOEING, BITCHES!

And thank you for sharing your beautiful greenery with us.

Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Domestic Dilemma

Mistress MJ is well aware that you're anxiously waiting to see everyone's gardening photos.

They WILL be posted later this week but in the meantime, Mistress MJ is having trouble with The Help...

[photos via]

My question is this...

How do YOU keep your houseboys under control?

Wenis Wednesday

First it was Wenis Wasps.

Now this...

[via]

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Back to Work

After numerous holidays and divertissement, Mistress MJ must get down to work.

[via]

Expect to see your gardening photos posted at some point this week.

Monday, August 01, 2011

Holiday!

Mistress MJ has a day off to celebrate Colonel By Day in which we take part in heritage lace making, rug braiding, and attend musketry demonstrations.

Oh who am I kidding? It’s another excuse to get liquored up!


See you soon, Bitches!

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Gardening Pics Reminder

Thanks to everyone who completed their HORTICULTURAL HOMEWORK and submitted photos of your plants and flowers and gardens.

Mistress MJ has received barrels full of photos!


You bitches worked hard to come through with those gardening photos!


The deadline for photo submission is TODAY so there’s still time to participate.

You can find details here.

Mistress MJ has guests this weekend hence the lack of blogging updates, comments, visits to your blogs or replying to your email messages.

All will return to “normal” soon.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Thursday, July 28, 2011

No New Post


Nothing to see here, move along!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Back to the Garden

Mistress MJ wishes to thank those of you who’ve submitted photos of your gardens, plants and flowers.

[thanks,Thombeau]

The rest of you have until Sunday to send in your pics. Details here.

Unfortunately, I haven’t had time to pop round to visit everyone so let me know how you’re doing and what you’re doing and I’ll see you as soon as possible.

p.s. Did you know there is a medical condition known as “Watering-Can Scrotum?”

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Of Gardens and Gaultier

Mistress MJ has returned and is pleased to see that some of you bitches have completed your horticultural homework.


Others need a reminder that your garden pics must be submitted by Sunday, July 31st.

Click here for details.

If Mistress MJ does not see more photo submissions in her inbox soon, she will not show you her photos from "The Fashion World of Jean Paul Gaultier: From the Sidewalk to the Catwalk" at the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts (Musée des Beaux Arts).

And unless you live in or are travelling to Montreal, Dallas, San Francisco, Madrid or Rotterdam, you’ll miss the chance to take in this extraordinary exposition as it travels from 2011-2013.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Calling All Hoes

Attention all gardeners!

Mr. Nude Infomaniac trimming hedges

YOU HAVE HORTICULTURAL HOMEWORK!

Mistress MJ will be in Montreal until early next week and when she returns, she wants to see some action in her inbox.

So….

Regardless of whether you have a fully landscaped garden or simply a houseplant, we want to see it.

Take a photo of your garden patch, your houseplant(s), that vase of flowers on your kitchen table, the weed poking through your foundation or whatever greenery you have around the house either indoors or out. Gnomes or other garden ornaments are acceptable too. Undoubtedly, Ms. Nations will be sending a photo of her toilet planters.

Send your photograph via email by Sunday, July 31st. (Don’t say I didn’t give you enough time.) My email address is in my Blogger Profile.

Be sure to include a little blurb about your greenery to go with the photograph.

We’ll publish a special gardening post with all your photos in near future.

Now get your green thumbs unstuck and show us your greenery!


Note: I won’t be responding to your gardening email messages as I’m on holiday but rest assured that I’ll be happy to read them nonetheless upon my return.