Sunday, May 04, 2008

SnUggs

I tolerated Uggs (short for Ugly) although they got on my tits.


Uggs




But when Crocs came along I was forced to put a pox on Crocs.





Crocs




Are you sitting down?

Because you’re about to witness a heinous fashion crime.

A pair of Uggs mated with a pair of Crocs and gave birth to THIS FUCKING MONSTROSITY




SnUggs




Have I walked onto the set of a horror film?

Look it over. There’s not a single attractive feature anywhere upon it.

There is NO EXCUSE FOR BAD DESIGN!

Who is responsible?

Is there a team of horned cobblers in Hell working feverishly around the clock to manufacture these abominations?







I couldn’t even wear them alone in the privacy of my own home with the curtains drawn!

And how the hell do you accessorize? What kind of outfit are you wearing to coordinate?

Do they come with a complimentary bucket for people to vomit into it when forced to look upon your ugly footwear?

It’s like a car crash. You just can’t look away. But force yourself, people. If you see them on a sale rack, run out of the store. Back away from the SnUggs.

If ANY of you purchase a pair of SnUggs, I’m cutting you off.

When oh when will the madness end?

Someone bring me a double martini. NOW!






DISCLAIMER: Infomaniac is not responsible for the nightmares that will result from staring at SnUggs.

34 comments:

  1. Ew. Now I have to go vomit.

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  2. They look sensible and comfy , and will last for years.
    What more could you want , they will go a treat with your pink PVC mack miss MJ :-)

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  3. Next thing you know, ol' Britney will be wearing these. WHITE TRASH buy this kind of crap....and think they look good.

    ewwww

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  4. I can just picture Maidy wearing them.

    She's the sort that likes that kind of thing.

    I wonder if they do them in tartan?

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  5. Wow I thought the Crocs craze had died out and they were happily long forgotten. Uggs included, not even celebrities wear them anymore.

    But SnUggs? Oh no, they are just hideous! Oh lord no!

    Like the squirrel said in Over the Hedge 'It never ennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnds'

    *vomits*

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  6. It looks like plastic from an old bucket or those cheap barbie dolls combined with well fake suede and faux fur by the way

    I hope they never make it to Denmark or I'd probably end up in jail or an asylum

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  7. The perfect accessories to lederhosen at a German beer festival. You wouldn't have to worry about the bloke next to you pissing on your toes.

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  8. i haven't seen the snuggs yet but imagine i will as those other pieces of shit are all over...who in their right mind would buy any of them...i hear people tell me how comfy they are...well i have a fucking clue people...you can get comfortable shoes that don't look like shit if you walk the hell out of payless and pay an extra buck!!! for cripes sake!

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  9. DINAH: Please use the complimentary bucket that comes with the SnUggs.

    BEAST: I don’t do sensible.

    Especially when combined with PVC.

    Thank you for your input, Mr. Blackwell.

    DORA: You’ve answered my unposed question as to which celebrity would be first to wear them.

    Britney could easily brush the Cheetos crumbs off them.

    PIGGY: Yes, speaking of trailer trash, they’re Maidy’s kind of thing.

    If they do come in tartan, I expect we’ll see a pair on your misshapen trotters.

    Oh, and I thought you were on hols.

    CYBERSHOES: I really had hoped you’d rush in to fix me a martini.

    But no, just thinking of yourself and SnUggs inevitable invasion of Denmark.

    Man the Viking ships.

    GEOFF: Call the VP of SnUggs Marketing.

    You’ve just hit upon a brilliant ad campaign.

    DAISY: Payless?

    While I love a bargain, I won’t set foot in any establishment promoted by Star Jones.

    I’d rather go barefoot.

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  10. a bargain is one thing...cheap shite is another...and star...well she is in her own category all by her lonesome...

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  11. nooooooooooo. Stop the insanity.

    Now.

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  12. Well on Thursday you can come over for a glass of milk

    That's all I can offer you for now MJ

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  13. I was actually looking for a picture of people having sex while wearing crocs. I couldn't find that, which is very fitting I suppose..

    Instead I found this

    http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/beauty/would-you-wear-these-crocs-high-heeled-sandals-165231/

    Oh lord NO NO NO! Did you see these before?

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  14. DAISY: Repeat after me...

    I will NOT wear cheap shoes.

    BOXER: Someone must be held accountable in hell for this.

    CYBERPOOF: Milk?

    I'm going to need a TRIPLE martini now that I've clicked on that link!

    I must take to my bed now as seeing those high-heeled Crocs has given me a case of the Vapors.

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  15. So that was news to you too?

    Quite revolting

    *sends his bartender over with a quardouble vodka martini*

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  16. A combination of sheepskin and plastic? Perfect combination to turn your feet into sweatboxes. Best not to take them off in polite company - the overwhelming stench would make people pass out.

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  17. CYBERPOOF: Oh thank heavens you've revived me.

    And I appreciate the extra-strength martini in lieu of smelling salts.

    BETTY: There's not an Odor-Eaters® product strong enough to cut through the SnUggs stench.

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  18. Pleasing footwear ... do they come with wooden soles too?

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  19. Of course, anytime.

    SnUggs, Crocs or other related footwear is so revolting and we need to stick together in this critical time of need

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  20. MAGO: Not unless you're planning to stick your finger in a dyke.

    CYBERPOOF: I am finding it increasingly difficult to live in a world of hideous footwear.

    Another cocktail, please.

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  21. Coming right up

    We can't have you sober with a post of atrocities like that

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  22. You'll cut us off? I got two pairs.

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  23. It is f*cking snowing here today so I must confess that these are lookin' pretty good right about now.

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  24. CYBERPOOF: A friend indeed.

    KNUDSEN: Proof that you never really loved me.

    Go with Anonymous Boxer then.

    But be warned.

    She only wants you for your cap.

    DONN: Evolution will see to it that future generations of Winnipegers are born with snowshoe-shaped feet.

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  25. Oh My... Who in their right mind would spend any money on those. I don't think you could pay me to wear them. UGH!!!

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  26. I am sure this unholy union is a sign of the impending apocolypse.

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  27. LEIGH: UGG!

    Welcome to Infomaniac.

    Remember to wear footwear that is aesthetically pleasing when you visit here.

    T-BIRD: They're made by a company called Aussie Soles.

    Blame Australia!

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  28. How lucky I didn't see this post yesterday.

    Btw, I'm buying a pair of Crocs.

    xo

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  29. MAIDY: Put on a pair of Crocs and instantly become unshaggable.

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  30. Oh fuck that's awful. I hope the Fasion Police beat them like Rodney King!

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  31. BABZ: Go right ahead and make a citizen's arrest.

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  32. OMFG isn't this too much?????
    I put a rant about it up a few weeks ago on the UGLY SHOE GROUP on myspace.

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  33. BROOKE: You are one of the enlightened.

    Continue to spread the word.

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  34. OH NO!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! What the hell will they come up with next?

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