Thursday, September 25, 2014

Perv of the Day

In a story that appears custom-made for Infomaniac, police apprehended a man on Saturday, wearing what appears to be lipstick and eye make-up...


His name? Calvin WANK.

Yes, you heard me. Wank ... the British slang term for masturbation.

Wank, age 56, of Deposit, New York, was arrested on the weekend for "touching himself" in a field and parking lot next to "Love's Travel Shop," a truck stop in the town of Kirkwood, about an hour south of Syracuse. He allegedly performed lewd acts, witnessed by several truck drivers.



The wanker has been charged with public lewdness and is scheduled to appear in court next month.

This incident appears to be unrelated to the Florida man arrested for masturbating while driving down Interstate 95, the California man arrested for masturbating while riding a bicycle, or the Florida woman arrested for masturbating on her motorcycle in her garage, with the door open.

12 comments:

  1. Gee, with that sexy cat eye thing he has going on, I think he should be nicknamed "Wink", Wink Wank.

    ReplyDelete
  2. THIS JUST IN: Man arrested for masturbating and attempting to open an exit door on a Virgin America flight from Boston to LA.

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's wank week!! It's always wank week at Westminster... now there's a slogan...
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's always Wank Week here on Infomaniac. Jx

      Delete
  4. First off, when I went home last week, I stopped at a Loves to rest my weary eyes. Second, he lived in deposit? I'll bet he made a few. Thirdly, do you think its right to expose Norma's brother like this? She was probably trying to keeps this from the paparazzi.

    ReplyDelete
  5. One should believe that truck drivers have something better to do than hang around and watch the Mr. Wank.

    ReplyDelete
  6. sweet mary sunshine! what was he thinking? that cleopatra eyeliner is all wrong for his face! i swear, sugar, but some people don't really look in the mirror before they go wanking, i mean out in public! xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm sure Norma could teach Mr. Wank how to cruise truck drivers. Without leaving a trace or Deposit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i did teach him, but he can't add 2 + 2.

      Delete
  8. it hadn't occurred to me to apply my mascara like that.

    ReplyDelete