Friday, February 08, 2008

Filthy Friday

I am honoured to accept the prestigious Knudsen Award for Most Filthy Blogger 2008.

Knudsen has presented me with this award, in his words, “for yer contribution to lowering the tone of the Blogosphere in a likeable and amusing way.”

I am touched to be recognized for my contribution to society.

“Filth is my politics! Filth is my life!" --Divine, Pink Flamingos

Yet I shall never achieve the summit of smut as practiced by the late, great Divine who reigned supreme as The Filthiest Person Alive.

For I have yet to eat a dog turd.

Thanks for the award, Knudsen. It's a fucking honour.


  1. My Word!
    Your perserverence presenting pornographic paraphernalia and body parts that end with 'alia' has finally paid off.

  2. MJ - please keep your acceptance speech down to below 5 minutes and if you say "You like me, you must really, really like me!" - we'll have to come down to BC and eliminate you. And not even Manuel's arse will save you this time.

    And kudos to OK for recognizing true talent! Reading his blog daily makes you realize what a student of worldly events the man is. Truly a giant among men (and weemen) and even Alfred Nobel himself would have to take a back seat to Old Knudsen. (likely because OK had done something very rude and discusting to the front one....)

  3. He's on about your toxic minge, not your penchant for penises





  4. Dog turd with aldente cauliflower......Mmmmmme

  5. I would like to help you become an even filthier blogger, if it wasn't fer the distance between here and there!

  6. LORD FOP: And I see that your perseverance presenting yourself with an “aliaS” has finally paid off.

    NWT: Wasn’t it Halle Berry who said,

    “Oh my gawd. I'm sorry. This moment is so much bigger than me.

    This moment is for every nameless, faceless filthy blogger that now has a chance because this door tonight has been opened.”

    CONNIE: *laffs as Connie slips in radioactive fanny batter on his way out the door which has just been opened*

    TICKERS: Red or white? Which wine should be paired with dog shit?

    RONKNEE: You’re a real gent.

    It’s nice to know I come first where you’re concerned.

  7. So that's why they only let you keep cats?

  8. Show us yer minge!

    That'll lower the tone!

    Lower it right down, go on

  9. SID: Because it took me so long to leash-train you.

    Sit. Stay. Beg. Come!

    SMUNTY: Why don't I treat you to a close-up?

    *sits on Smunty's face*

    Tone lowered.

  10. Congratulations!

    Your putrescence knows no bounds.

    * puts on hazmat suit *

  11. That divine gurl was hot until Huge Grant stuck his dick in her.

  12. We are all so proud of you your Filthiness.

    Was pPink Flamingos the one with the man with a dead chicken tied to his todger

  13. IVD: You'll need more than a hazmat suit to protect yourself from my radioactive toxicity.

    *leaves trail of ooze on IVD's doorstep*

    KNUDSEN: She's still working that same street corner!

    BEAST: That's the one.

    And who can forget the furniture-licking?

  14. Congratulations you filthy minx

  15. CYBERSLUT: Thank you, you dirty Dane.

  16. I am here to say congrats and to also whine... I want a Knudsen Award. I even offered to pay the old Geezer for mine.


    But, you know, good for you.


  17. It's great to come here, have a laugh and watch you decimate all the people who try to outwit you!

    The rude pics are just a bonus.

    I'm a bit of a prude, aren't I? The pics aren't really rude. They are AWESOME!

  18. Any one of the cognoscenti will tell you that Strongbow is the only thing to drink with fresh dog turd.

  19. BOXER: To get on Knudsen’s good side you need to follow these instructions:

    A) Spend at least an hour naked in an ice-cold meat locker.

    B) Lie very, very still.

    An award will be forthcoming if you follow this advice.

    T-BIRD: Wait ‘til I post the nude pics of IVD!

    TICKERS: I was thinking Buckfast would be the obvious choice.

  20. Congratulations on a well deserved award!

    *Washes hands after leaving this blog*

    *Still feels dirty*

  21. I'd really prefer to write a check, but OK.

  22. BINGOWINGS: You need to wash more than your hands.

    BOXER: A cheque from you would bounce even higher than your tits on a trampoline.