Saturday, October 06, 2007

A Crabby Bitch


  1. So is that horrendous, freakishly long, but slightly amusing neck.

    As are the orange peel thighs.

    As are the Beryl The Peril stripey stickings.

    As is the funny accent.

    Yay! First!

  2. 'Stickings' is a local Yorkshire colloquialism for 'Stockings'.

    But you knew that, didn't you?

  3. Can I rip your arms off??

    OK then just the one.

    You'll need that for self pleasuring.

  4. You've really been watching America's next top model haven't you?

    You know all about the importance of the neck now.

    How much hairspray did you have to use? it looks like a helmet

  5. It looks like she's used more Botox than hairspray.

  6. True

    What really amazes me is the comment about charm

    MJ has charm?

    Like a car crash maybe

  7. I thought I was the charming bitch of this posse.

  8. No Maidy. We're the charming bitches!

    We could charm the knickers off Mother Teresa.

    *shudders at thought*


    PIGGY: Oh shit. I didn’t notice the model’s neck. Fuck.

    Stickings? *consults Yorkshire-English dictionary*

    SID: The only thing being ripped off is the posting title.

    Did you notice my play on your “A Crabby Life” post title?

    Did you? Eh?

    CYBERSLUT & PIGGY: I have enough hairspray left to spray your big gobs shut, that’s how much.

    MAIDY: I was saving this pic for you but since you so seldom visit any of us anymore I couldn’t’ be bothered.

    PIGGY: Mother T. went commando, didn’t she?

  10. No. Its just that her knickers fell to her ankles, petrified.

    It apparently required the services of 3 master sculptors to chisel the off.

    Hence that stupid shuffly walk she sported.

  11. PIGGY: I thought she had a stupid shuffly walk because she had a Diving Nun stuck up her sari.

  12. I think this is MJ's way of sharing her 'secret' that she has crab lice.

  13. No, MJ. The Diving Nun was a myth to cover up the fact that she had a prolapse that push it's way through her wire brush covered cunt.

    Rimshot - Believe us, it was no secret.

    We did send her a bottle of Derbac lotion once, but she admitted to us that she couldn't bear to kill them.

    Feeds them every day, so she does.

    And they all have names. The adults and the squillions of babies.

  14. Ah, I see all possible avenues of nastiness have been covered, so I'll just toddle off...

    * crunch *

    Christ, MJ! That one was the size of a vacuum cleaner. I didn't so much step on it, as fall over it!
    I can see why you let it out to play, though. If a crab that size was hanging off one's muff 24/7, it'd play havoc with one's back.

  15. And neck!

    I wonder has she trained her crabs,like Smunty and his performing fleas?

  16. RIMSHOT, PIGGY, IVD & SID: I simply can't have crabs as there's no landing strip for them to cling to.

  17. Never mind all this long necks and crabs nonsense. For the love of Ike! Can't you just post some more pics of sexy seniors displaying their bollocks and dongs? Need less fluff and more eye candy.

  18. FYI, shaving will not get rid of the crabs; using a lotion such as Derbac will get rid of the crabs. Don't forget to launder the sheets and clothes and towels and to notify all your partners to treat themselves to prevent reinfestation.

  19. PERI: Sexy seniors? I'll post a pic of Piggy.

    BINGOWINGS: You seem to be an authority on crabs.

    Have they cleared up yet?

  20. MJ, I shall need to come in person with a large magnifying glass to see if you're all clear. I'll be very careful that the sun doesn't accidentally sear your skin through the lens.

  21. YAY 21st!!
    Isn't it about time you changed them fucking tights you dirty bitch.

    Crabby BITCH. Sponge Bob will be happy that you've pick that name.
    Sponge Bob loves crabby patties!

  22. BINGOWINGS: No, I was asking if YOURS had cleared up!

    TATAS: And you love crabby panties.