Wednesday, August 20, 2008

TARDIS Traveller

Mistress MJ bade sayonara to Japan and is travelling in a TARDIS through time and space to points unknown.

Where might she end up next?


  1. Inside Piggy's big pants, if he's still alive that is.

  2. muff........probably (it's a place in Ireland)

  3. NWT: Lethbridge, Alberta?

    Go for the sunshine, stay for the rednecks.

    BEAST: *scans research files*

    Only one pub in Walton on the Naze?

    Mistress MJ might just as well land at The Rovers on Coronation Street.

    GARFER: *peers through a window, somewhere in Yorkshire*

    Piggy’s still alive though his blog is defunct.

    Word has it that Piggy and Tazzy will resurface in near future.

    Enjoy the peace and quiet while you can.

    MANUEL: Muff?

    I hear the diving is spectacular there this time of year.

  4. "a properly maintained and piloted TARDIS can transport its occupants to any point in time and space"

    Mistress MJ, have you read the instruction manual?

  5. Set the control for the heart of the sun.

    And beware the Trekkies' conference.

  6. fuckin A come to illinois...the corn is high...the beans are ripe...couldn't ask for more!

  7. XL: Mistress MJ is having problems with the sonic screwdriver.

    GEOFF: Trekkies?

    Mistress MJ is fearful of Klingons.

    DAISY: Mistress MJ has concerns about places where the inhabitants say “Fuckin’ A”.

    She might as well go to Lethbridge.

    And where there are ripe beans there are ripe farts.

    She might as well go to Bournemouth and crawl under Beast’s stinky duvet!

  8. Bangcock. Bangkoc. Bang...

    The big city in Thailand.

  9. It doesn't matter where she takes the Tardis. She's a woman, which means that she will get lost 11 times, dent all 4 corners, park it 2mtrs away from the kerb, leave gunk sodden tissues in the glove box and lock the keys plus the baby inside.

    Which one of us will get an hysterical phone call sometime later tonight (usually when the football is on), summoning help as she has either ran out of bio fuel or put the wrong type of banana skins in the flux capacitor?

  10. Planet of the Apes - more like Raquel Welsh than Helena Bonham - Carter

  11. TROLL: Ah Phuket.

    BOLLIX: And if I get lost, you menfolk will be no help asking for directions!

    KAZ: Howz about Raquel Welch in “One Million Years B.C.”?

    Strange, wasn’t it, that she was lacking the typical Neanderthal hairy body, receding chin and low, sloping forehead?

  12. the moss-covered american dream come true that is VERNONIA.

    here you will find a unique northwest blend of hardcore conservative butt ignorance and crystal gazing, dope smoking reincarnated zaniness as three cultures collide and inbreed in the glorious natural beauty of oregons coastal range! surrounded by scenic wonders (underwater, covered in moss) you will soon understand why Vernonia Oregon is known as 'the Rainbow at the End of the Road' (by the mobile home with a wrecked dump truck out in the front yard that a bunch of dogs are standing on barking while someone shouts 'SOMEONE WANNA SHUT TH MUHF*****G DOGS UP IM BEEN TRYINA WATCH MUHF*****G MARTHA STEWART)

    your tardis will go virtualy unnoticed amid the rich diversty of abandoned peterbilt truck cabs, giant ag tires, towering stacks of rusted steel drums and the partial remains of almost every car built by detroit during the 1970's!

    marvel at the peaceful mingling of native american and tarheel (aided by liberal lashings of Oly and Wild Turkey)! get lost in the amazing selection of native handicrafts (ki bricks of dank soaked in cherry coke, sawblades painted with scenes of mt. hood, chainsaw sculptures, meth) yes, you'll come by way of Tardis, but you'll stay for the unusually high percentage of amputees! Vernonia is calling you!

  13. Oddly enough, the TARDIS does seem to be headed toward the Pacific NorthWest.

    Control Room has no further comment on this matter.

    *battens down hatches*

  14. Are you in cahoots with WW and have kept it a secret all this time?

    I thought HE was the only one who did the time travel thingie.

    Nice Tardis, by the way. And how's Dr. Who?

  15. I think you're on a crash course to Ronson's Shoe Store.

  16. PONYGIRL: Beware.

    WW is circling Uranus.

    BOXER: Ronsons?


    More likely Davids.

  17. Hmmm.... that could be interesting....

  18. PONYGIRL: Very interesting and potentially dangerous as Uranus is a gas planet.

    I smell danger!

  19. if you could swing by the gun show on yer way home i have a .338 waiting for me there... no need to pick up any brass ive got some already fire formed and ready to load...

  20. Are you sure you're not actually Hurricane Faye?

  21. VOICES: Mistress MJ is more Gong Show than gun show.

    BOXER: You'll have to look into my eye to see.

    RANDOM: Disneyland?

    Not if they won't allow me to wear my musical panties.

  22. OI I dont have a stinky duvet
    Cheeky cunt

  23. This comment has been removed by the author.

  24. if you can travel thru time , you could go back and shag Young Knudsen

  25. Hmm, how about here to Vegas? We can put her to work in one of the canals upstairs underwater scrubbing the undersides of the gondolas and picking up pennies the tourists chuck in.
    Or we can send her next door to have a bit part in the Crazy Girls topless show.
    Or across the street to appear at the nudie bar.
    Whichever will get the most clothes off.

  26. BANGKOK. Yeah, I said it...Damnit ! Troll beat me to it !

  27. BEAST: Perhaps not but you smell like a ripe Limburger or a particularly pungent Pont l'Eveque.

    CYBERPOOF: Somewhere you've never been, obviously.

    BEAST: What makes you think Mistress MJ hasn't already done so?

    JOE-VEGAS: Click here to see part of Mistress MJ's Vegas experience.

    HEFF: Phuket you, too.

  28. Obviously!

    I hope you get stuck in Bankok doing the ping pong ball trick for the rest of your life.

  29. The Tardis only goes to alien worlds and England--past, present, or future. Stick with the alien worlds; the weather is much nicer.

  30. CYBERPOOF & EROS: Don't the pair of you have Olympic totty to report on somewhere?

    What about the Olympic Teabagging event?

  31. For a brief moment in time, we were able to connect personally with Mistress MJ.

    However, the Sub-wave communication system has failed and she has been silenced once more.

  32. I've only just blogged about my Olympic Boyfriend.

    No teabagging though, at least no mention or photos of it.

  33. huh, i dont know where you would want to be other than right here next to me!!!

  34. Somewhere neck deep in perversity, no doubt.

  35. 63mago too tired to sign in7:48 PM, August 20, 2008

    A goddam bed.

  36. CYBERPOOF:A Canadian?

    Alexandre Despatie?

    Oh my! That pic you have of him in the red trunks is particularly revealing!

    TONY: Drat. She's late for the Dock Pudding Championships.

    VOICES: *TARDIS zooming in again over Pacific NorthWest yet focusing, oddly enough, on Inner Voices*

    Stay tuned.

    MAXI: Why stop at her neck when we could she could be in over her head in it.

    MAGO: Would you like a TARDIS for your bedroom?

  37. Mistress MJ:

    No, don't go to Lethbridge. I would suggest Neepawa, the birthplace of...oh, I can't remember her name now.

  38. If you happen to run into Bill and Ted tell them I still waiting for them to pick me back up from Caligula's party ... I'm getting a bit worn out.